But with Kayla, something tugged on his heart that he preferred to keep fairly separate. He cared for her. He wasn’t cold with those he led or counseled. But Kayla gave him a visceral sensation. He hated to see her cry. He wanted to stop it. But maybe she didn’t want him to stop her. Maybe she wanted to cry. Maybe she only sought shelter and care from him.
What a strange thought.
“It’s not so stupid. Sometimes you’re allowed a moment or a night to digest the latest bad news or event. You know? Yes, there are children starving and always someone worse off somewhere, but right this second, you’re allowed to feel bad about what happened to you.”
She sniffed and rubbed her face against his hard chest. In a muffled tone, she said, “I thought you’d scold me for being so spoiled. My dad is rich and famous. I’m well loved and well fed and protected and given every possible chance in the world. There will be others, right? So I’ll be fine in the long run.”
“If you thought I was such a condescending jerk, why did you come to me?”
Her shoulders shrugged under his arms. “I don’t know. I still wanted to see you.”
“Still? You really think I’m that insufferable?”
She lifted her face high enough to glance up at him with a small half smile. “It would not be too far out of the realm of possibilities for you to be, especially with me.”
He couldn’t help smiling back. Pulling off the stray strands of hair that were caught in her lips, he said, “I counsel and listen to many people for a living. You know that, right?”
“Right. But you usually scowl at and scorn me for fun.”
“I used to,” he corrected her.
She smiled up at him. “Did my pussy make you nice?”
He gave her a stern look. “Was that really necessary?”
“Yes.” She giggled. “It made me laugh, so yes. And I expected you’d give me that exact look. Eyes halfway bulging behind your glasses, head tilted, mouth puckered… it was definitely necessary.”
“Maybe you’re right. Maybe it’s because my dick finds you kind of cute?”
She gasped. “I can’t believe you said that.”
“Well, of course, it’s true. But…” he tilted his head and gave her a tiny smile, “it’s much more than that.”
She stilled and sighed, pressing her head closer to his chest. “Is it? More than that? What is it?”
He rubbed his chin on the top of her head. “I don’t have any idea. Nothing I planned or expected. I can tell you that.”
“You started it. So you can’t say you didn’t plan it. I can though. And yet here I am. Sneaking out at night to cuddle up to you. It’s a bit depressing.”
“I didn’t mean to start it. And you should never go anywhere at night without your guards again. Ever. You’re too old to be sneaking over here. And what’s so depressing about me?”
“Well, first, you are not at all my type. A pastor? I can’t imagine my friends’ hysterical reactions. It makes me shudder. Secrecy is a great idea. And I sneak around because I’m still a rock star’s daughter. The very thing you had to endure with Kathy is here again. Kind of ironic, huh?”
“I won’t deny the irony. Yes.” He frowned at learning she was embarrassed about him, his job, and his calling. He felt irritated by her and… crap. She kind of evoked something stronger in him. Anger? Yes. And a little bit of hurt. It never occurred to him Kayla would find him unacceptable. “Kathy was never embarrassed about me.”
“Kathy always tried to smooth out your social gaffes. She tried to convince us that you didn’t mean some of the judgmental, antagonistic remarks you made.”
He waved a hand around dismissively. “Oh, that. That was mostly just to piss you guys off. None of you liked or approved of me. I knew that. It was odd for me since most people do, owing to my calling. And if you give me that much credit for it, I have to assume I’m not terrible at it.”
“I had no idea you did that to piss us off.”
“Why wouldn’t I?”
“I didn’t know you could be that devious.”
“So you preferred to think I was just that clueless and rude?”
His head tilted with interest and made her laugh. It felt good after how disappointed she was. “Yes. Actually. But it’s interesting to realize you aren’t.”
“Interesting? There is so much about us that I find interesting; more than I would have ever pegged. Considering our start…” His words faded off again as soon as he tried to validate their connection.
“To this? Yeah, I would have never guessed.”
His hand dropped down, running over her arm and palming her hand in his. “Want to stay?”
“Here? Me and you? On purpose? Are you admitting that?”
“Completely on purpose. Yes, I’m admitting that to you, at least.”
Her eyebrows lifted. “At least. But I’m hungry and I don’t want to have sex. Do you still want me to stay?”
He smiled and his heart swelled and lifted. He did want her to stay, to do absolutely everything and nothing with him. If she stared at him reading, it would be better than being all alone. “Yes. I really do. We can order a pizza.”
She nodded and released him as he turned to pick up his phone. “What do you like on it?”
“Anything but green peppers.” She made a face.
He nodded. “I can live with that.” He pressed some buttons as he spoke.
“You order takeout often?”
He tossed his phone to the couch. “Yep.”
She glanced around. “That’s not exactly high-brow cuisine.”
He snickered. “There is nothing high-brow about me. Look at this place.”
Judging by the way she studied him, she thought differently. He wondered if she
