“Please, just stop, okay?” Noah gave her a peeved stare. “Didn’t we have this talk already? I’ve got a lot of logistics running through my head and I need to keep it all straight in order to get us where we need to be. We’re nowhere near safe yet, even though this place is secure enough for tonight.” He shook his head and scowled, turning away to pace the room. “All your chatter about diapers and clothes and what you’ll do when you get home is driving me insane.”
The small bubble of joy that had risen inside her at the thought of freedom and hot baths and a life where she didn’t have to look over her shoulder constantly burst. Deflated, her shoulders sagged and she lowered her head to stare at her toes. She’d only been trying to help, but it seemed she’d made things worse.
Crap. Exhaustion mixed with her depression, quickly morphing into defensiveness. He didn’t have to be such an ass about it. Yes, he was frustrated and on edge. So was she. She still managed to be polite and upbeat, while he was just being a dick.
She rose from her chair with as much dignity as she could muster, head high and chin raised, walking past him without a glance. “Well, pardon me for having ideas. I’m going to take a bath now, if it won’t annoy you too much.” She reached the bathroom door and stopped, looking back at him over her shoulder, feeling every bit as bitchy as he’d acted moments before. “And if it does bother you? Tough shit.”
* * *
The bathroom door closed with a resounding thwack and Noah just stood there, staring at it for a long few seconds. What the hell had just happened there exactly, he couldn’t say. What he did know was that his blood was thumping through his veins and if he didn’t know better, he’d say he was turned on as fuck.
Though that situation quickly went away, thanks to the crying baby who’d woken up at the loud ruckus.
Dammit. Slowly, Noah turned to look over at Gracie on the bed and back at the bathroom door. Soon, the sound of running water let him know that nope, Serena wasn’t coming back to deal with this.
Shit. Just shit.
Carrying the kid in that sling through the jungle was one thing. She’d been remarkably unfussy, and when she had started crying, Serena had been quick to step in for a feeding or a diaper change. Picking her up now, when she was all red and squalling and seriously pissed off, and trying to soothe that away was quite another. Great.
Okay. Fine. Think, man. Think.
He set his phone aside and walked back to stare down at Gracie. The first rule he’d learned in conflict resolution as a SEAL was to manage stress quickly while remaining calm and alert. He took a deep breath to ease the tension knotting his muscles, then knelt beside the bed to put him and the baby at eye level. The next step was to control your emotions and behaviour. If he acted nervous and upset too, chances were good the baby would pick up on that and react accordingly. So, he needed to keep his shit together as much as possible. He flexed his hands several times at his sides to limber up his fingers then gave the kid what he hoped was a reassuring smile while her little face scrunched up even more with unhappiness and her tiny cheeks turned splotchy.
Please let this work. Don’t screw this up.
This was worse than his last round of hostage negotiations in Beirut. At least then, he’d had his SEAL teammates to fall back on in case he messed up. Now, it was just him and around ten pounds of fury and frustration here on the bed. Through the bathroom door, he heard the water shut off, then soft humming. Humming? Yeah, Serena was getting back at him for the way he’d acted earlier, and damn if he didn’t feel a little guilty about that. Maybe he had been too harsh on her, but he was doing the best he could here. She wasn’t the only one out of her element these days.
And speaking of elements, things were still stormy on the infant front. Noah rolled his neck and shoulders, loosening the tension there before widening his smile. Gracie tracked his movements, her little legs kicking and her wails dialing down a few notches.
Good. Right. Keep going.
Next step, pay attention to the emotions being expressed. Well, he didn’t speak baby, but from her tears and cries and angry fists flying, it was pretty obvious Gracie was not a happy camper. Tentatively, Noah reached out a hand toward her, his heart stumbling when she latched on to his finger, holding on tight.
“Wow, that’s quite a grip you got there, kid.” His smile this time was genuine. “Not sure what kind of sports you like, but you could be a major league pitcher with that grip.” Noah grinned and jiggled his finger, chuckling when Gracie’s crying subsided in favor of a drool-filled smile. “Do you want to be a Cubbie, huh? Your daddy is a die-hard Cubs fan. Yes, he is. And maybe someday, when you grow up, they’ll let girls play in MLB, because that would be awesome. Yes, it would. Gracie could walk onto Wrigley Field and own the place. Yes, she could.”
Gracie cooed and squeaked as if that sounded like a
