“Did you send my brother in to die to protect Levi? I know he was your close friend back then. Did you have to choose between your friend and my brother?”
“No, but I won’t be able to convince you. You’re judge, jury, and executioner, and you always have been.” He hadn’t even given her a chance to try to explain. Three days after his brother’s death, he’d moved out, and she hadn’t heard from him again until he’d sent her divorce papers. He hadn’t fought for their marriage. He’d decided she wasn’t worth fighting for and he’d moved on.
He pointed to the computer. “How else am I supposed to make sense of this? You hid an entire investigation from me.”
“We knew we would have to keep secrets when we got married. We both worked for the Agency and that meant putting a wall up when it came to certain missions. It was classified and beyond that, Ezra didn’t want you to know he was using drugs. He begged me. I was worried if I told you, he would hurt himself. He couldn’t deal with the shame you would have heaped on him.” She felt every bit as helpless now as she had then.
His jaw went tight and he started to pace like a lion in a cage. “So now this is my fault? I’m the bad guy here? Apparently I was the only one who wasn’t doing something criminal. If you knew my brother was doing drugs and you didn’t pull him off of his team, you’re just as bad as him. He was the fucking medic.”
She was screwed. It didn’t matter which way she went. This was always how they ended. “I was trying to protect him the only way I could. By that time there were some bad people after him.”
“So you took his team on an op and decided it would be better to let him die?” His face was an angry mask.
“I’m done, Beck.” If she talked much more the real truth would come out, and she suddenly realized it wouldn’t save her. It would bury her deeper, and she would have given up a piece of her soul.
“You’re not done. This is now an investigation of you, and if you don’t want me to turn you over to Levi, you’ll comply with everything I tell you to do. And no, I’m not going to touch you again, so you can get that straight out of your head. You’re the same snake I always knew you were. The stupid thing is I’d convinced myself we had a chance. That pretty pussy of yours made me think you could do no wrong and I was the one who fucked up. I was actually thinking about a future with you, about kids and a house.”
“Well, it’s good that you know the truth then.”
“Yeah, because wouldn’t you make a hell of a mother. You’d be exactly like your own. You’d use that kid to make yourself look respectable, but you wouldn’t give a shit.”
Something inside her died in that moment, some light that had started to flicker back to life.
He went quiet as though he realized he’d gone too far, but the damage had been done.
She turned away. “I’m going to bed.”
“I shouldn’t have said that,” he said on a sigh. “I’m mad and I’m struggling to understand.”
She nodded. “You’ll figure it out. You always do.”
She would be the bad guy. It was the role she played in his life and she was done.
“I’m not joking about the investigation,” he said, his tone back to commanding. “I’m going to find out what happened then, and you are going to tell me everything you know.”
Sure she would. He thought that because for the most part she’d been indulgent with him. She’d dealt with his anger because she’d loved him, and she’d thought somewhere deep down that she could fix him. In some ways he was every bit as bad as Levi. He thought he loved her when what he mostly did was hurt her.
She’d done things she wasn’t proud of, done things she deserved his scorn for, but she’d loved him. She’d wanted the best for him even if it meant sacrificing.
“Of course.” She would agree to anything to get away from him. She needed to plan because she couldn’t stay with him. She had no one who would help her. Well, no one she could call. There was one person in all the world who couldn’t deny her aid.
“I’m going down for a run,” he said. “There’s a treadmill on the second floor. I shouldn’t talk to you when I’m this angry. I need to burn some of this off and then maybe I can look at you and be somewhat civil.”
He wouldn’t have to look at her ever again. Drake had been very correct in what he’d said. She had resources Beck didn’t know about.
She stood and watched him walk away from her and planned her escape.
In the end, it was easy. She packed a small bag, put a hoodie on, and walked out the door. The security system gave her a full minute before the alarm went off, and that was more than enough time to get lost on the streets of Paris.
She made her way to the apartment she kept and took the chance to enter. It took her exactly five minutes to get to the safe, get the cash, gun, and passport she kept there. She was hiding in the tree in the back of the building when Beck got there. She waited until he’d strode out, yelling at someone on his cell.
When she was sure he was gone, she walked to the road and hitched a ride out of town. From there she took a train to the south of France and chartered a small plane to take her into Italy. Every now and then she would feel eyes on her and change direction.
