‘What are you doing here?’ I stammer. ‘I didn’t see you inside.’
‘I’m Callum’s lawyer. We’ve kept in touch since school. I couldn’t make it earlier because I was wrapping up a big case. I just arrived in time to hear your farewell speech. Quite a story.’
I close my eyes. Mark. First love, first fumble, first naked breast Mark. Slept with him behind Doug’s back, Mark. Don’t tell me he’s come out here to gloat.
‘Yeah, well you’ve had your laughs now.’
‘It’s not laughs I was looking for.’
I hear him approach me. He reaches down and takes my hands, pulling me up to face him.
‘Although, I’d take that as part of the package.’
He kisses me. Slowly, gently. Oh my God, I’d forgotten how good he was at that.
Suddenly, I pull back.
‘Mark, I need to ask you something first.’
‘What?’ he replies, puzzled.
‘Are you married or gay? Have you ever been prone to psychotic acts of vengeance? And have you ever been paid for sex?’
He throws his head back and roars with laughter. He eventually composes himself enough to speak.
‘Not that I know of.’
I smile and curl my fingers through his hair.
‘Good. Permission to proceed granted.’
I almost got another snog. Almost.
‘CARLY!!!!’ It’s a hysterical Sarah.
‘Over here,’ I yell.
She runs towards us, gasping for breath.
‘It’s Kate. Her waters have broken and they’ve called an ambulance. She’s screaming for you; wants you to go with her.’
Panic! ‘I have to go, it’s an emergency!’ I say as I kiss Mark, then start to run after Sarah.
I’m ten feet away when he shouts, ‘Cooper, is your life always like this – one drama after another?’
‘Always,’ I reply, grinning.
‘Well, I suppose I’d better get used to it, then.’
And as I watch him laugh and shake his head, I think…
What if… there’s a happy ending after all?
Epilogue
One year later
I’ve been Mrs Barwick for six months now. Mark always jokes about two things: one is that he’s spent his life saving my ass and the other is that he always had money in the bank until he met me. His wedding present to me was to pay off my credit cards, much to the relief of the financial institutions involved. My present to him was to throw three packets of contraceptive pills, two diaphragms and a family size box of condoms (you can never be too careful) down the loo and start trying for his much-wanted brood. Unfortunately, my contraceptive armoury wasn’t biodegradable; we kept our local plumber in business for a week. We decided to settle in London and he transferred to his company’s office here. I don’t want to be nauseatingly sentimental, but God, I love him. He’s everything. We fit perfectly and I still can’t believe that the right guy for me was there all along, and I didn’t see it.
Our future kids will have two gorgeous cousins to play with as Carol and Callum are expecting twins next month. Carol is delighted about it now, but it took her six months to get over the shock of losing her figure. She’s covered up every mirror in the house. They can’t decide on names for the babies. We suggested ‘American’ and ‘Express’; at least then she’ll bond with them immediately.
Michael finally danced with Kate’s sister, Karen, at the wedding and they’ve been together ever since. Or so we think. They went into Michael’s bedroom twelve months ago and they’ve yet to come out.
Sarah and Nick also got married this year. Sarah is still studying and hopes to be a qualified teacher by next summer. Nick treats her like a princess. They were made for each other.
Basil is a thing of the past. Jess tipped an ice bucket over him at Kate’s millennium party and he was last seen heading back to his wife, his tail firmly between his legs. We read in the papers the next week that she’d rejected him, though. Seems she’s shacked up in Brisbane with the French rugby player; she told the Sun that she’d never realised what a real orgasm could feel like. Jess is now awash with passion for the very journalist who exposed her affair to the nation. It brings a whole new meaning to having press contacts.
My mum and dad are talking about reconciling. My mum has ditched Ivan and my dad’s on some twelve step recovery process, having finally admitted that he drinks too much. Trouble is, he can’t seem to get past the step where he has to walk by a pub without entering it. Mum is ever hopeful though. In some crazy way, I think she missed having someone to nag.
We see a lot of Joe and Claus. They decided to make ‘J.C.’s Heaven’ an international chain and opened their second one in London last month. Claus now doesn’t let Joe out of his sight. I don’t think Joe minds.
Phil and Lily came to the opening too, as did Tom and Ellen. They all stayed at our house for a week and I was sad to see them go. Still, we’ll see them again at American and Express’s christening. Carol couldn’t decide who to pick as godparents, so they’ve ended up with twelve. It’ll be like the Last Supper at the top table.
Doug Cook won’t be there. He’s gone into hibernation since Saskia left him. She was ‘spotted’ by a film producer who was on one of her flights and she’s now in LA, testing for Baywatch.
She’ll probably meet Sam there. He’s been signed up to play the lead role in the movie based on his screenplay, The Gigolo. I believe he did all his own research for the part.
And Kate? Well, Kate’s been fired from her job for threatening a diva client with a hot-brush. It’s probably for the best. Since Bruce won the award of ‘UK Architect of the Year’, she’s been frantically busy moving house, hiring nannies and cleaners, shopping and socialising. Now
