Her throat tightened, a lump forming at the back of it. “What am I even doing?” she muttered to herself, shaking her head in disappointment. “You’re not even here, Dad. You haven’t been here for a while now.”
Ignoring the sound of her heart breaking all over again by yet another man who was supposed to be her family, she grabbed her plate and began cleaning up.
•••
Carmen’s fingers ran over the different fabrics of the clothes hanging in her closet, the blouses and skirts swaying gently as she released them from her temporary hold.
What was exactly acceptable to wear on a first date? She knew that she didn’t put much of an effort when she went to that party two nights back, but she didn’t really care because she’d felt comfortable in a simple turtleneck and jeans. It kept her warm and allowed her to dance freely.
But tonight was going to be different. She was going out with the sole purpose of spending the night with the boy she loved, and that meant putting in an effort.
Not wanting to dwell too much on it, she pulled on a pair of unused black jeans, ripping off the price tag still attached to it, and chucked it across the room.
Her hands were just about to reach for the cream-coloured camisole when her eyes caught a flash of black and she recalled Asa’s words which now resonated in her head.
“I’ve never seen you completely in black.”
“It, uh, it actually looks really good on you.”
A fond smile crawling across her face, she reached for the black camisole instead, feeling the silk slide smoothly across her skin as she slipped it on. Carmen would have been contented to go out with him in just those clothes, but wearing a sleeveless top would be plain stupid considering the November air was growing harsher by the day. Her gaze flickered to the clock and saw she had only about fifteen minutes left. She quickly threw on a red bomber jacket and paired it with a grey scarf around her neck.
After applying some eyeliner and brushing through her hair until she was satisfied with her appearance, Carmen spared her reflection one last glance and then headed out towards the living room, only to hear the doorbell ring.
Her heart instantly leapt to her throat at the sound, and her feet picked up speed until she was practically skipping towards the door. Wrapping her palm around the doorknob, she pulled it open to find Asa standing on her front porch, a make-your-heart-skip-a-beat smile on his face.
“Hey,” Carmen breathed out, her mouth stretching into a wide grin without her being conscious of it.
“Hey you.” He smiled softly, his eyes drinking her in as if they were capturing this particular moment and committing it to memory. “You’re wearing mostly black,” he commented, biting down on a corner of his mouth to obviously suppress the huge smile that was threatening to take over his face.
“Someone once said it looks good on me,” Carmen said, stepping out of the house and locking the door before slipping the key into her pocket.
“That someone was definitely right,” Asa replied, slipping his hands into his pockets, a gesture that caused Carmen to take in his appearance.
The cream-coloured crew neck sweater he wore hugged his torso, defining every single muscle from his broad shoulders to his sculpted chest and leaving very little to Carmen’s imagination. It was crazy, honestly, the way she’d always known that he had the looks that caught every eye and a body that made heads turn and yet it was the one aspect of his being that she’d never really given much thought to.
She’d fallen in love with the way he uttered her name as if there was a constellation waiting to be named after her.
She’d fallen in love with his mind, the same one that recited a seventeenth-century quote to her in his truck.
She’d fallen in love with his heart, the very one that returned her art journal purely out of the belief that she deserved her kindness back.
And she’d fallen in love with his soul, a soul strong enough to make a confession of being in love with her even when she was just a broken version of herself.
After all that—after telling him she loved him back, after being kissed by him ’till she was gasping for air—here she was, now beginning to fall in love with his body, too.
Realising she was probably staring at his form for a little too long, Carmen looked up at Asa to find his eyes already on her, causing her cheeks to grow warm.
“You don’t blush often,” he told her, voice serious. “But when you do, I swear to God it drives me insane.”
“Were you born with that smooth tongue or did you have to pick up lessons along the years?” Carmen asked cheekily, lifting a corner of her mouth into one of her signature teasing smiles.
“Does it really matter?” Asa asked, that mischievous glint present in his eyes as his lips formed a lazy smirk. “Because you weren’t complaining about my smooth tongue that night in the park.”
Carmen’s jaw dropped as all words abandoned her, and something like fireworks erupted in her stomach. “Asa!” she hissed, wishing the ground beneath her feet would just crumble and drag her down with it.
He laughed and pulled both hands out of his pockets, walking towards her and pulling her into a tight embrace. “I’m sorry,” he said, the ghost
