I look away from him briefly. "I don't want my parents to know. It's embarrassing."
"Okay, whatever. They won't hear it from me. You don't tell your mom much, do you?"
"It's not like she would care," I tell him. And she wouldn't. She's never around, she never really listens to me and I long ago stopped confiding in her. All she cares about is selling houses and Ethan.
Manny's brow is furrowed and suddenly I have this urge to reach up and smooth his forehead out.
"So...you're probably taking Gina to prom?"
"Uh, no." Manny shakes his head, as if trying to clear something from his mind. "No, I'm taking that Brandy Crane chick. She's a junior."
"Oh." I nod and act like I have the slightest idea who Brandy Crane is. I feel a sudden stab of jealousy which is totally insane. I mean, Manny and I aren't together or anything, so why would it matter to me?
Someone grabs me from behind and I feel Ryan give me a sloppy wet kiss on the cheek.
"Found the perfect one!" He holds up the first suit he tried on like an hour ago. "Hey, Manny!"
Manny nods at Ryan. "Ryan. Nice suit."
"Okay let's pay for it before you change your mind!" I push Ryan towards the check out and give Manny a little wave.
I can feel his eyes on my back as I move away.
◆◆◆
Prom night is the same as it was the year before. And the year before that. When I was a freshman a senior asked me to prom but Mom wouldn't let me go. So, this is my third prom and once again Mom is following me around the house with her camera, snapping pics while Ethan takes video.
I check my hair in the mirror again, it looks pretty decent. I'm wearing it up in a french twist with tendrils hanging down. My dress is gorgeous and Mom is letting me wear some of her more expensive jewelry, including her real pearl drop earrings.
I leave my room and start down the stairs, but Mom makes me go back up so Ethan can get video of me walking down.
"Oh my God, Mom, it's not like I'm getting married!" I roll my eyes, but dutifully do my walk down the stairs.
"That's gorgeous, just gorgeous!" Ethan is acting like he's shooting a major film. I wish my Dad could be here, and Steve. I miss them so much and I really could do with good "Dad" talk and even some of his stupid jokes.
The doorbell rings and Ryan arrives, holding my corsage.
"Ohhh!" Mom is getting all teary eyed, snapping pic after pic as Ryan pins the corsage on my chest. "Okay, now Ryan, you put your arm around Taryn, and Taryn, you kiss Ryan on the cheek!"
"Mommmm!" I groan and Ryan grins. Finally, Mom and Ethan get all the footage and pics they need and Ryan and I take off in his car for the country club, where the prom is being held.
Ryan is bubbling with enthusiasm and I think I'm doing a really good of faking it. Truth is I want to be at home. I used to love Prom, but really, right now, who cares? Not me.
But I paste a smile on my face and let Ryan walk me into the club where the place has been decorated to look like a space ship, of all things. I take one look around and burst out laughing but Ryan thinks it's cool.
"Wow, man it's like being on the moon!" He's turning in circles and staring up at the ceiling where they've hung stars and planets against a black back-drop of crepe. Mannequins dressed in space suits line the walls and I see Patrick and Jason posing two of them into a compromising position.
My smile fades when I see them. "I didn't think those two would be here."
Ryan follows my gaze. "Just ignore the idiots. Come on, let's find our table and then we can dance."
There's a DJ playing the latest music with some older slow songs thrown in now and again. I spy Manny and his date. Brandy is plump but pretty, I guess. Manny looks like really hot in his tux. The boy cleans up good.
I try to have a good time. I really do. But all around me it feels like people are watching me and whispering. I don't even know if they really are anymore, to be honest. It just feels that way. Ryan and I slow dance and I bury my face in his neck so I don't have to see the others. Kim is here with Jason and that idiot Kendra, is with one of the wrestlers. Pam and Kyle are together and Patrick is now with Linda. I turn my face away from each couple I see and swallow the bitterness.
Then Michael comes in with Ava. He's a chaperone apparently, dressed in a super sexy navy tux that makes his blue eyes even more dazzling. Ava is wearing a dress that is obviously meant to coordinate with his tux. It's a tight-fitting backless halter type dress covered in sequins with a slit up one side. They make a beautiful couple and she hangs on his arm like he might escape.
My eyes cloud with tears and I quickly blink them away. Then Michael looks at me from across the room and I can't read his expression. He holds my gaze for a long moment then his lips slide into a smirk and he raises Ava's hand to nuzzle a kiss across her knuckles.
Tearing my eyes away I put my lips to Ryan's ear. "Let's leave. Please?"
He pulls back and frowns at me. "What, now? The Prom's just started!"
"I know, but..." I push myself against him. "I want to be with you. Now. Like right this minute, Ryan."
He gulps slightly and then nods and I have to practically run to keep up with him as we dash towards the
