I had begun to cry, although I fought it as much as I could. Grammy scooted over the Kleenex that I would need.
“And then, the other night at Emma’s, Cash showed up. He kissed me and I slapped him. He was behind all this…and he is…and now I’ve lost Wyatt. Worst of all I had told Wyatt I loved him, and there is this part that regrets it…”
Rhonda’s eyes got as big as saucers and she looked angry. “That Cash!” She shook her head no in disapproval.
Grammy spoke up then, “Don’t you ever regret telling someone you love them. Ever.”
I cried and then excused myself. I thought I would feel better having talked about what happened, but I didn’t.
I felt lost and empty. I wished Grammy’s comfort could cure me like it did for so many years, and make the pain go away.
But this wasn’t possible.
Not anymore.
WYATT
Rhonda called me to her house, asking that I come over as soon as possible. She gave me very few details, but I made my way over there dropping everything that was going on.
Who was I kidding? I’d been functioning on half a cylinder, quite honestly, since losing
Breigh.
When Rhonda told me what had happened with Cash kissing Breigh and how terrible Breigh felt and looked at church, my heart ached. I was glad to hear she slapped him, but I still had something to do about that. It certainly wasn’t said and done without my knocking him on his ass.
“I don’t know what you thought happened but…” she said sternly and disappointed.
“I was wrong. So very wrong.” I put my head in my hands, not wanting to see the look of disappointment in her eyes, at me and my actions.
“To say the least.” She paused. “Cash has done so many things to you in your life, but this is a new low. And you took the bait. He played you like a fiddle.”
She paused. “You let him take something from you that you love…still…”
I looked up at her and listened. Her voice was coated with frustration.
“You said you loved her, but then you walked away…and even if you have a come-to-Jesus meeting, and you get what happened and want to fix it…I can’t say if I was her that I would.”
“What?”
Her comment surprised me. She had always been straight on, telling me like it was without a filter but this…my eyes were tearing up and I felt like I couldn't breathe.
“Tonight I saw her at church with Helen. And she was broken, Wyatt. She is hurting badly. I know she loves you, that is clear, but I think you may have really ruined this one.”
“I thought with what happened with Cash and what had happened with April…”
“She’s not April. That’s like you saying everyone is like your piece of crap father, or your mother, who is a loon half the time. All people are different.”
“I was scared.”
“She was too, but she let you in, she thought you deserved to know the truth of what really happened. With Cash and between her and her ex. Yes, her ex. Helen had told me what happened last Sunday.”
“I should have listened and taken her word for it.”
“Yeah, you should have, but you didn’t. Shoulda, woulda, coulda, Wyatt.”
“Breigh could have been the love of your life, like Kurt was mine, and you wouldn't even let her tell you what happened. You owed her that at the very least…”
I stood determined to process everything Rhonda said.
“So what do I do now?”
“I can’t tell you that, but I can tell you that if it was the love of my life, I wouldn't let them walk away for good. Make her listen, and if she still won’t take you back, then make sure you tell her how much you love her, and you are thankful for the time you had with her.”
“I don’t know if I can…”
“Well, then that’s your problem, not mine, isn't it?”
BREIGH
The knock at my door remained at the same pace for the last thirty minutes. I thought I heard the repetitive sound but was napping after the meltdown I had. I was exhausted and could no longer keep my eyes open.
I opened the door and spotted Wyatt sitting in my rocking chair on my porch.
“What are you doing here?”
He walked toward me with a look of determination. He took my face into his hands and kissed me. I pull back shocked and mad at the same time.
“You can’t just come here and kiss me like that. Not after what…”
“I know, Breigh. I came here to apologize. I made a huge mistake. Tons of them, actually. I didn't trust you, I didn't listen to you. I didn't hear what the woman I love was saying.”
“You discarded me like I wasn't worth it. You didn't fight for me. You said you would always be there for me, and you…” I started to tear up. I didn't want him to see me cry. I wasn't going to be weak around him. He had already seen me that way.
“I screwed up in so many ways. God only knows how bad I feel for how I hurt you. I am so sorry.”
“Thank you for that.” I stepped back into my doorway and reached for my door to close it. I didn't know what else to say, I didn't know what would make this better.
“Please don't shut me out.”
“You mean like you did me?”
“Breigh, please don’t. Please let me prove my love to you. I love you. I love you like I have never loved another person in my life. I have been miserable since we broke up. My life isn't the same without you.”
“You made that call, though.” I wanted to so badly stand strong. I wanted him to know he hurt me but also that he didn't break me.
But he did.
“You are right. And I can’t take that back. All I
