“I don't know. I needed to tell you this, all this, and I wanted your thoughts on it. You have always been such an important person in my life and it matters to me what you think.”
“Emma, I love you, sweet girl. And I am so excited to see you become a mother. Now, I can’t tell you whether to let this gentleman into your life, but I can tell you the right thing to do is to let him know he is going to have a child. That doesn't mean he has to be a part of your life in the sense of a husband, but that child has the right to have a father. Wouldn't you agree?”
“Absolutely. I have the best daddy in the world, and I would want any kid of my mine to have that. But I am not sure about how he can be in my life. Don't you think that love sometimes isn't enough? What if he goes back to how he was before, running around like a playboy? Or what if he…”
“You could do that all day. What if, what if. That will drive a person crazy. What if he really has turned over a new leaf though and has become the man you want him to be? For you and your unborn child? Would you want to take that risk?”
I nodded my head yes. Maybe if I just motioned it, but didn’t say it, I wasn’t confessing.
“What about seeing him one day over at Breigh’s with a family, another wife and children?”
“I don’t want to even think about that. It would crush me.”
“I think you have your answer then. Above all, Emma, pray. God will guide you. He always does guide me. My old bones will be eighty-eight this spring and he hasn't let me down once. Sometimes he guides me where I’m unsure or scared, but there is always a reason. Trust in his plan.”
“Reason, season, or lifetime.”
“That’s right. So what is Cash? If he was a season, then he taught you something, whether you know it or not. Then reason, you know this one well with Breigh. And finally for your lifetime. That one’s pretty self-explanatory.”
I started to answer and she put her hand up. “Don't tell me. Pray on it and see where it leads you, my dear. Now finish those cookies and drink that milk. It’s good for the baby.”
She walked slowly to the fridge again and topped off my milk.
“Boy, do I love a visitor. I don't get them as much. You are welcome anytime, you know that?”
“Yes, ma’am. Thank you.”
I had a good feeling I wouldn’t be moving from this spot until she kicked me out.
22
CASH
“Hi, Mr. Galloway,” the guard said as I walked in. I had been here a total of three times in the last couple months, but he seemed to remember me for some odd reason. I had hoped it wasn't because my father was bribing him somehow, yet it wouldn't have shocked me.
My father was a master manipulator.
Hell, I grew up idolizing a man, that now years later, I realized was nothing like I wanted to become. Or had become. Today I came to see my father because I wanted to update him on my life. In a way, rub it in his face.
Was it wrong? You bet.
Out of the times I had visited him, one of us had walked away mad. His character had become crystal clear to me, and I had wondered how I was so blind to it previously.
I sat at the glass window waiting to talk to my father, now seemingly a man I wasn't sure of how to think of him.
What was he to me now?
When he appeared before me he had a shit-eating grin on his face, a look I had seen him wear man times when he thought he had won someone over. I always thought he had the upper hand. And usually did.
“Didn’t think you would be back so soon.”
It was my time to smile. “Well, I have some news I wanted to share with you.”
“If it doesn't help me get out of here then I really don't care.”
I froze, shocked by his comment. Selfish son of a bitch. I fought a growl that was rising in my throat.
I felt I was literally out of my body, observing moments of my bad behavior and the way I acted toward others. Even my own blood.
I raised my voice slightly to get his attention but not to cause a scene. “Believe it or not, it has nothing to do with you. You would think I learned my lesson from working for you, wouldn't you? Anyway, you can get up and walk away if you want but I am going to tell you why I came.” I waited a minute to see if he was going to stay put. Which he did.
“I got accepted into the police academy. In fact I’ve already started.” I watched to see his reaction and the anger filled his eyes. We had the same eyes, in fact, people used to say I was a spitting image of his face. I recall thinking that was a compliment years before, certainly not now.
“I can’t believe you would turn on me like your brother.”
I began laughing. It started as a chuckle and then it grew. What was first a quiet sound became loud, almost obnoxiously so. It pissed him off and I found joy in that.
“You turned a company that my grandfather started into a stealing, thieving disappointment. You would have turned it all on me if you could have…and I know you tried. You have always looked out for yourself rather than your wife and children. What kind of man…”
He stood up and slammed the phone onto the table so hard pieces flew, hitting the glass window.
I didn’t stand up, I sat exactly where I
