Had Kayla seen the articles? Did she think it was well written? Did she think it was accurate?
Or would she refuse to read the article because she didn’t want to be reminded of me?
I sighed and got out of my chair to go to the window and look out at the city.
In each and every one of those pictures, it was clear on my face that I was looking at a woman I loved.
Suddenly, it struck me.
Kayla was looking at me with the same look in her eyes in all those pictures. She had genuine feelings for me, just as I did for her. If I was hurting now, how must she be feeling as the one who had to put a pin in things all for Lisa’s sake? Was she questioning herself? Did she resent Lisa for this? Did she want to call me more than anything and explain it all?
Did it matter?
I loved her. That was what mattered. And I was quite certain she loved me, too.
I’ve come too far to give up now.
I loved my sister. Lisa was one of the most precious people to me in my life. But she didn’t get to choose who I fell in love with or wanted to spend the rest of my life with. She didn’t get to tell me no, and she didn’t get to stop Kayla either.
No, I refused to let her stand in the way of the best thing that had ever happened to me. I wanted Kayla.
And at the end of the day, I was still Lukas Holt. The new and improved Lukas Holt to be sure, but I was still the guy who went for what he wanted. I was still the guy who put it all on the line even in the face of rejection.
Now was not the time to throw in the towel and go soft.
Chapter 36
Kayla
“Lisa, pick up your phone,” I said into Lisa’s voicemail service. I’d called several times a day for the past four days and she’d sent each and every call to voicemail. I’d texted and emailed and received no replies. “We need to talk about this. You can’t ignore me forever. I understand that you’re upset and that I hurt you, but please, give me a chance to tell you what happened. You know me. You know I wouldn’t do this to you on purpose. Things just… I don’t know. They got away from us. Please. Call me back.”
I hung up the phone.
I knew she wouldn’t call me back. Lisa was as stubborn as her brother. Once she’d been wronged, or felt like she had, she would stick to her guns and hold a grudge against her enemy until the end of time. I never thought I’d be on the receiving end of that stubbornness but there I was.
Suffering.
I wanted my best friend back. I also wanted my lover back. But I couldn’t have either of them.
The guilt and shame that I’d felt on Sunday morning had long since morphed into despair and, to my surprise, anger.
I was angry at Lisa’s reaction. I was angry that she didn’t seem to care about Lukas’ happiness, or mine for that matter. She could only see this thing from her side, and for some reason, she thought it was all about her. It wasn’t.
It was about me and Lukas and how happy we made each other—how much better we made each other. Couldn’t she see that? Couldn’t she see through her own cloud of fury long enough to realize that this was real?
I wouldn’t have risked our friendship for something that wasn’t real.
I raked my fingers through my hair as I sat at my desk at the Good Fellow’s head office. I had so much pent-up frustration because she wasn’t giving me a chance to speak my piece. I needed to get it off my chest. I needed her to hear me. Otherwise, I was going to be stuck in this lonely place for eternity.
I wanted my relationship back with Lukas but I knew I wouldn’t sacrifice my friendship with Lisa for it. Somehow, I had to get her to understand how I felt about him. I had to get her to listen.
I grabbed my purse and left the office, locking up after myself. Clearly, the phone calls and virtual messages weren’t working. I needed to take drastic action.
I hopped on the bus and rode it to the closest stop near Lisa’s duplex. There was no way to know if she’d be home, but I figured she’d be trying to spend as little time as possible at Lukas’ office that she could. So, naturally, the first stop was her house.
After walking six blocks from the bus stop to her duplex, I found myself standing at her front door feeling more than a little nervous.
I’d thought of everything I wanted to say to her on the bus but now my mind was blank. There was nothing but white noise up there.
It doesn’t matter. You need to buck up and knock on that door and make her listen to you. If you’re not willing to put it on the line, then you never deserved Lukas in the first place. Right?
My fingers tingled as I lifted my hand to the door and knocked.
To my surprise, the door swung open and Lisa stood there with her phone pressed to her ear. Her eyes narrowed on me as she spoke to the person on the other line. “I’ll have to let you go, Mrs. Weiss. Can I call you back in an hour?”
She hung up
