“Wow. Very true,” Lance said. “So, you’re right. I guess I don’t want anything different, except that I want somebody to see me for who I am now.”
“And, in this way,” the doctor said, “what they’ll see is literally what they’ll get. You’re a much more honest and open person now, just because life has given you enough lemons to make lemonade, as they say, but you still have the peels and the wreckage around you. So, anybody who loves you now will love you for who you really are on the inside.”
“Does that mean my physical body is so hard to love?”
“Not at all,” the doctor said. “But the physical becomes secondary. Not the primary focus.”
“But sexual interaction is good,” Lance argued.
“It’s divine,” the doctor said with emphasis. “And a very welcome part of any long-term relationship. And honestly, I’ve seen that lovemaking happens many times too, yet I don’t think it has as much to do with the physical attraction. I think it has to do with that special spark between two people, and, once that spark is there, the physical just becomes a conduit for the emotions. And, more often than not, the physical body, the aesthetics of it, makes no difference.”
“I hope so,” Lance said, “because otherwise it’ll be a little tough to find anybody who’ll like this.” And he motioned at his body.
“Looks to me like you’re already well on your way,” the doctor said with a big grin.
Lance realized the doctor meant Jessica, and Lance felt something settle inside himself. “Maybe and maybe not,” he said, “but I’m grateful that I can even talk about this right now and can even think that potentially she’s there on the same pathway with me.”
“Exactly,” the doctor said.
Chapter 10
Jessica’s days carried on in a regular pattern of constant work. Visiting with Lance, more work, visiting with Lance, a couple trips into town for a breather, and more work. Finally, after a week had gone by, they were back up to full staff again. She walked with a cup of coffee down the hallway to check in on Lance. It was early yet, ten minutes before her rounds were due to start. She knocked on his door and heard him call out. Opening the door, she stepped in, and he looked up in surprise.
She smiled. “I know I’m early,” she said. “I just somehow ended up at work a little bit too early, so I have time for a cup of coffee and thought I’d stop in and say hi.” His smile was real, and she loved that about him.
“You know you’re always welcome here,” he said. He dropped what was in his hands.
Looking at it, she asked, “Sheet music?”
He nodded. “It is,” he said. “I used to write music too.”
He gave her a lopsided grin that reminded her of a little boy caught doing something he wasn’t supposed to. “Wow,” she said in awe. “You really are multitalented, aren’t you?”
“Well, I was,” he said. “Trying to get the fingers to do what I need the fingers to do now? Well, that’s a different story.”
“But you don’t have to figure it all out right away, do you?”
“No,” he said. “Not necessarily. As long as I’m figuring it out and making progress.”
“That’s true.” She smiled at him. “I didn’t bring you a cup of coffee because I wasn’t sure if you were ready or not.”
“I’ll get one when I head down for breakfast,” he said. “I was just looking at some songs and wondering if I wanted to try writing again.”
“Well, if you need anything,” she said, “just ask.”
“Thank you,” he said. “I might.” He looked down at the pages, picked them up, and tucked them into the bottom of a big notebook he had.
“Is that a special song?”
“Not really,” he said. “It’s one I’ve been working on for a long time.”
“That means it’s definitely special then,” she said. She looked at her watch and groaned, hopping to her feet. “Honestly, the time whips by when you’ve got to head to work.”
He laughed. “The time just whips by, period.”
She waved at him and headed to her office. Once there, she sat down and started her day.
Shane popped his head in a couple hours later and asked, “Have you talked to Lance at all?”
“This morning for a minute,” she said, looking up from her computer monitor. “Why? What’s the problem?”
“No problem,” he said. “His hands are definitely strengthening up nicely. The shoulder needs more work, but it’s getting there too.”
She beamed. “That’s great,” she said. “I know he’s been quite concerned about playing music.”
“Not only playing music,” Shane said, “but apparently our boy is very talented and actually has played in several bars and clubs.”
She looked at him in surprise. “He mentioned that. I’m not surprised, as he does seem to hold an audience.”
“I was hoping that maybe we can get a little more music back into his life, but we still have some patients and staff who don’t find it appealing,” he said.
“I was thinking about asking Dani if maybe on Saturday or Sunday he could have an hour, and they could shut their doors and ignore him for that sixty minutes.”
“That’s not a bad idea,” he said. “To schedule it ahead of time, so they can deal with it however they choose.”
She nodded. “He does go down to the pastures a fair
