“Oh you silly, stupid, girl.” She throws her head back and laughs. “I already have.” She steps closer, her tall frame casting a shadow over me. “Every time you call and he doesn’t pick up? I’m right next to him, watching as he silences the phone.” Another step closer. “When you beg for him to come home? All it takes is one word from me, and he drops everything to be by my side.” Her finger taps her chin. “Now, I wonder why that is?” A smile spreads slowly across her face before she spins on her heel and walks out.
My fingernails dig into my palms so hard I’m sure I’m breaking skin. I trust Chase.
I love Chase.
But I can’t stand the way this feels.
We’re back at the apartment, and Lindsay’s leaving. Finally. Chase walks her to the door, speaking low, close to her ear. I analyze every single moment between them, unable to tear my eyes away. Her earlier words have soaked into my skin. They’ve mixed into my bloodstream and reached my heart, causing fissures with every beat.
I feel the couch dip beside me. Jax’s arm settles around my shoulders. “Sweetheart, you stare any harder, and you’ll burn a hole straight through her.”
The sting of my eyes makes me blink, but I don’t turn away.
“Just talk to him, Alina. Don’t drive yourself crazy with the ‘what-ifs.’” He pulls me closer, dropping a kiss on the side of my head.
The front door closes. Chase walks back over, stopping short when he sees Jax and me on the couch. “You two look cozy.”
My breath whooshes out at his audacity.
Jax laughs. “Yeah, well… someone had to make sure your girl was taken care of while you were busy with the local trash.”
I stifle a smile, my mood warming at Jax’s show of loyalty.
Chase’s jaw tics, like it always does when he’s holding back what he wants to say. “What the fuck is that supposed to mean?”
Jax levels him with his stare. “Which part?”
The silence is deafening.
“Anyway, I’m beat, bro. I’ll see you two in the morning.” Jax stands up and stretches, walking down the hallway, leaving Chase and me alone.
Chase sidles up to me on the couch, his arms winding around me. I don’t return the embrace.
“Baby,” he whispers. “Come on, Goldi, don’t be like this.”
I bristle. “Were you ever gonna tell me, Chase?”
“Tell you what?”
I run my hand through my hair, my foot tapping. “Oh, I don’t know. How about we start with the fact you’ve been tellin’ me you’re workin’ when you’re really spendin’ your nights in another girl’s apartment.”
He releases me, sitting back. He sighs, looking down at his hands. “I did work that weekend.”
“That’s not the point!”
“Goldi, you have to know Lindsay’s just a friend. You do know that, don’t you?” He scoots closer, reaching for my hand.
I jerk it out of the way. “She doesn’t want to just be your friend.”
“She’s in a fucked-up place right now and needs someone to lean on. That’s all.”
“Oh, really? What’s wrong with her?” The mocking in my tone doesn’t go unnoticed.
He tugs his hair as he stands, pacing the floor. “She asked me not to say.”
I scoff, rolling my eyes. “Predictable.”
He walks toward me. “Goldi, listen to me. I don’t fucking want her. I want you. I love you.”
The dam bursts on my emotions. His words stab my insecurities, making them gape open and bleed. Tears trickle down, and I don’t bother to wipe them away. “You have a real funny way of showin’ it lately, Chase.”
He sinks to his knees, pushing his body between my legs. “Don’t cry,” he whispers, brushing the tears from my face.
I turn my head into his palm, squeezing my eyes shut. “I need you to choose me, Chase.”
“I do choose you.” His grip on my jaw tightens, forcing me to look in his eyes. “I’ve been fucked-up after Lily. I know that. I’ll do better. Just… just don’t give up on me. Please.”
The lovesick girl inside of me grasps his words, hanging on for dear life.
14
Alina
Eighteen Years Old
My toddler group’s second recital is this weekend. When it comes to two and three-year-olds, “choreograph” is a loose term. That doesn’t stop everyone I love from showing up like my routine’s on Broadway. I appreciate their support. I never realized how much I would fall in love with teaching dance. Now I can’t imagine doing anything else with my life.
There’s a studio about twenty minutes away in downtown Chattanooga that’s offered me an internship. At first, I wasn’t sure if I would accept because it would mean skipping college. But Jax encouraged me, saying college will always be waiting. He may be biased though, considering he chose to stay in Sugarlake as a mechanic, instead of furthering his education. His late daddy always dreamed of having his car restorations in the movies, and Jax is set on seeing that dream through.
I haven’t told Chase about the internship yet, but I’m planning to this weekend. He was hoping I would apply to ETU, but I know if I don’t take advantage of this opportunity, I’ll regret it.
“Hey, sweetheart.” Jax grins, shutting the sliding door to my backyard.
“Hiya, Teeth.” I smile.
He rolls his eyes. “Stop calling me that. These babies are one-hundred percent au naturale.” He runs his tongue over his pearly whites. “You ready for the big night?”
“I’m more than ready. Nervous, but my girls are gonna steal the show, you just wait and see.”
He clicks his tongue. “I don’t know. I heard the eight-year-olds have some killer moves this time. I’m not sure your toddlers can keep up.”
I smack his chest. “You shut your mouth with that kind of talk, Jackson Rhoades. I’ll have you know my kids can out-dance those eight-year-olds all day long.”
“Oh yeah? And why’s that?”
“Because they have me, of course.”
“Now that I believe.”
My cheeks flush at the compliment, the air shifting as he loses his grin.
He clears his
