The other two men flinched, but she ignored their reaction and bid them a gracious goodnight.
As soon as they left the room, she turned to him. “What was that—”
“Once we’re back in our quarters,” he interrupted.
She frowned but followed him silently back to their rooms.
“What was that all about?” she began as soon as the door closed behind them.
His mouth descended over hers.
Chapter Fifteen
Serena’s indignation at the abrupt departure from dinner vanished as she lost herself in John’s kiss. Her doubts faded away as well at the hunger with which he kissed her.
When he finally lifted his head, she smiled up at him. “What was that for?”
“I shouldn’t have left the way I did earlier. I can’t ask you to be open with me and then stomp off when you hesitate.”
“Thank you,” she said softly. “Did you find anything when you stomped off?”
“Not really. I didn’t want to leave you so I mainly just lurked around outside. But there is one thing…”
“What?”
“I think this place is even larger than it appears,” he said slowly. “My cybernetic enhancements include sound propagation—a way to detect if something is solid or hollow. Either there are a number of unexplored caves or there are a lot more rooms than they showed us—rooms with no obvious entrance.”
Her heart rate increased. “A secret lab in a secret lab?”
He grinned and shook his head. “It sounds ridiculous, doesn’t it?”
“No, it doesn’t. I logged into the system while you were gone, and there are hidden entries in there as well, I’m sure of it.”
She hurried into the office and he followed her, watching curiously as she pulled up the log records she had noticed earlier. “I’m sure there should be more here.”
“Secret records in the secret records,” he said ruefully.
“Exactly. I started a small decryption program earlier. Let’s see if it worked.” Her hand trembled as she opened the program. A few seconds later, lines of data began scrolling down the screen. “It worked!”
“What does it say?”
“There is another lab. And they’re working with nanites.”
“To create more hybrids?” he asked grimly.
“No, I don’t think so. These look like much smaller, more targeted efforts and… that’s strange.”
“What is?”
“It looks like the scientists are using themselves as subjects. But there are so many more names here than people we have encountered so far…”
“Perhaps their experiments weren’t successful.”
Despair washed over her but she kept reading. The experiments became fewer, but they lasted longer.
“I think that may have changed. Here. Patient 236. This was six months ago, and there’s no record that the experiment failed. What if they’ve been successful?”
“Successful? You have to be kidding. Would you trust them?”
“I might.”
“Why, Serena?”
He had asked her to be open with him. But then again…
“Why are you here?” she asked. “You never did tell me.”
“I told you I was in the military,” he said slowly.
“Yes?”
“I suppose in some ways, I still am. They’re the ones who sent me to Mars.”
Her stomach felt queasy. “To spy on GenCon? To shut us down?”
“To shut them down if they are violating the law.”
“By creating the hybrids.” And by creating the technology that’s my last hope.
“Not necessarily. It’s a grey area, especially if they consented to the experiments. But we can’t let them take over Mars. You know that—that’s why you tried to stop them.”
The rational part of her agreed with him, but the familiar taste of betrayal filled her mouth. “So that’s why you’re really here. I should have known.”
“No, I’m here because you asked me to accompany you.”
She wanted to believe him, she really did, but she couldn’t.
“It doesn’t matter anyway,” he added. “You’ve just told me that there’s no evidence that they are creating hybrids here.”
“No,” she agreed absently.
“But that isn’t really why you wanted to come here, is it, Serena? It wasn’t about the hybrids at all, was it?”
“No.”
“It’s about this, isn’t it? But why?”
She intended to lie, intended not to tell him about her deficiencies, but when she opened her mouth, the truth rushed out. “I can’t have children. I was… damaged. A long time ago.”
His face softened. “I’m sorry. I know that must be difficult.”
“Difficult?” She heard the bitterness in her laugh. “I wanted—I want—a child so much. To not be alone. To have a family.”
Saying the words made her feel more exposed than if she had been naked in front of a hundred people. She schooled her face into the familiar mask and turned away from him. He came up behind her and put a big warm hand on her back. She wanted to lean into the support he offered, to turn and bury herself in his arms, but the place inside her that had been hurt so terribly wouldn’t let her. She shrugged off his hand.
“You don’t have to be alone,” he said softly. “And you don’t have to give birth to have a family.”
“I don’t expect someone not of my blood to love me.”
“Blood doesn’t guarantee love. My mother proved that.”
“No! My child will love me. He’ll never betray me.”
“Serena, I love you.”
Tears rushed to her eyes, but she refused to let them fall. She wanted to believe him—she wanted desperately to believe him—but she couldn’t. He had lied to her once. Was this just another lie?
“That’s very nice of you,” she said politely. “But it’s not enough. I want a child.”
There was a long silence, and she was glad she couldn’t see his face.
“I see,” he said finally. “And you’re here because you think that the technology that GenCon used to create the hybrids can restore your ability to have children.”
“Yes,” she whispered, almost afraid to say it out loud.
“Serena, you can’t. You’ve seen the abominations they’ve created.”
“It doesn’t have to be like that. Your nanites work—they heal you.”
“This isn’t the way.”
“You don’t know that!”
“I see.” His voice sounded heavy, tired. “And this is more important to you than anything else? Even a man who already loves you?”
“Yes.”
“Then I guess that means it’s time for me to leave.”
No! She didn’t want him to leave.
