“Hey, you know what they say—YONO!” She waves her fork around in the air.
I laugh so hard I almost spew fake whipped cream everywhere. “It’s not YONO. It’s YOLO.”
“What? I thought it said YONO.”
“Where—in Piper’s journal?”
“Shhhh!!! What journal—I had no idea my daughter had a journal. I thought it was short for you never know. Like you never know what might happen.”
“That would be YNK.”
“Oh yeah. I just had a baby. Shut up.”
“YOLO stands for You Only Live Once.”
“Yeah. That too. You only live once.” She checks the door to make sure no one’s around and whispers, “You don’t have to do it in the garage. You can do it on the ferry on the way back.” She winks at me and then shoves more pie into her mouth.
“Hah! Right.”
Bex waggles her eyebrows. “You wouldn’t be the first—all I’m saying.”
“Wait—have you done that?”
“My lips are sealed,” she says, grinning and nodding. “I promised Josh I wouldn’t tell anyone. Which is why I never told you. And I’m not telling you now.”
“Nuh-uh! Shut up. You did not!”
Her eyes are practically bulging out of their sockets as she nods vehemently. “No, we would never do that. Especially not last year when we were coming home from Christmas dinner, and you were inside the boat with Piper and Mom and Dad.”
“Whaaaaaat? You and Josh did it out on the deck? Come on.”
“No, we definitely didn’t, because Josh would never do such a thing—and I also didn’t give birth to an infant nine months later. I’m just saying—baby it’s cold outside, so no one else is around and YOLO. But wear a coat because it really is cold.”
I shovel the rest of the pie into my mouth while contemplating this. “I can’t bone my boss on the Staten Island Ferry. I mean, he wouldn’t even set foot on the Staten Island Ferry.”
“What is he—a Kardashian?” she says, imitating my aunt. “Everyone rides the ferry. You already rode your boss in Ohio, so why not give him what every man really wants for Christmas?”
“Public sex while he’s freezing his nuts off?”
“Fine then. Don’t have sex with him, but invite him over.”
“I can’t. We can’t have dinner with both our families two nights in a row—we aren’t actually dating.”
“Why are you so afraid of this?”
“Of what? Of ruining this perfectly good temporary fake dating arrangement with my moody boss?”
“Everything’s temporary until it isn’t. Nothing’s real until it is. Every guy you’ve ever been with ‘for real’ has been unworthy of you, and you finally have this guy who—”
“I don’t have him.”
“Please—every relationship you’ve ever had has ended either because you finally realized the guy was unworthy or because he told you that you deserved better than him, but that always meant he wanted to start seeing someone else. And you do deserve better. You’re finally with a guy who’s on your level, and you don’t even want to admit that it’s a thing. I’ve seen the picture. They don’t make ’em any better than that. Look at that picture of the two of you on your phone, Maddie. You’re a couple.”
“Yeah. For six, maybe seven more days. Wait. Where is my phone?” I feel around for my phone, but I don’t have any pockets on me right now. “I should probably check in on him. Make sure he ate dinner.” I find my phone in my coat pocket, on the bed in my aunt’s guest room. I see that there’s a missed call from Declan and call him back.
He answers immediately and hesitantly. “Piper?”
I burst out laughing. “Um. No. Would you like to speak with her—who shall I say is calling?”
“JK LOL. How’s it going?”
“Fine. How are you? You sound cold. Are you outside?”
“Yeah. I’m just…walking around.”
“Where? By your office?”
“Not really. You having fun with your family?”
“Yeah, they’re great. It’s nice. The baby’s so cute, but he’s asleep right now. You sound hungry. Did you eat dinner?”
“Not really.”
“Dec. You haven’t eaten all day?”
“I was working. By myself. I forgot.”
Ohhhh fuck it. YOLO.
“Do you want to come over? I mean, we’re done eating dinner, but there’s plenty of leftovers and dessert. I know it’s not part of the plan. What you planned. For us. I mean you and me for the…as part of the…what we discussed before about…” Holy shit, am I stammering? I’m stammering. I do not stammer. Pull it together, Cooper. “It’s really low-key and very Staten Island, but you’re welcome to join us if you don’t have anything else to…” I pause because I hear a police siren going by the house outside, and at the same time, I hear a siren through the phone.
“You sure you want me to meet your family? I don’t want to impose.”
I shuffle over to the living room, past my family who are watching Love Actually on a gigantic big screen TV, and peek out the window. “Oh my gawd,” I whisper into the phone as I stare out at my boss down on the sidewalk, all bundled up in a puffy coat, scarf, and beanie.
“What is it?” my aunt calls out from the sofa. “Is my neighbor throwin’ his trash in my bins again? I swear to gawd this time I’ll kill him.”
“Dec,” I say into the phone. “What are you doing here?”
“OMG, is he here?!” Piper jumps up and runs over to the window next to me.
“Is who here?” My sister comes over to look.
My niece’s hands shoot up in the air as she does a victory dance. “It’s Declan! He’s out front! I gave him the address, and he came!”
“Gave who the address? Who’s Declan?” My mother gets up from the sofa to join us. “Dad—pause the movie!”
“Where is everyone going all of a sudden?” my dad asks. “This is my favorite part of the entire film.”
When Declan looks up from the
