From what I heard, some people in Declan’s family were a little miffed that Maddie isn’t Catholic, but they had a priest marry them at a really cool space in the West Village, and once everyone saw how pretty it was I don’t think anyone cared that it wasn’t at a church. Everything was gold and silver and black and white. Mom was matron of honor, of course, and I got to be a bridesmaid! We wore gold dresses, and I was paired up with Eddie!!! As Great Aunt Mel would say—could you die?! So pictures of us might end up on celebrity gossip sites! I keep checking but nothing yet. Oh well I’m totally going to send them some.
Maddie wore a glittering silver and white gown and when Declan saw her walking down the aisle with her dad, he started crying. Not like a big baby, but like a man who is head over heels in love with his stunning wife. It was really cute, and the way they looked at each other…it made me want to grow up.
This beautiful old lady named Mrs. P-something got up and read a Russian poem at the reception and she was all funny and dramatic. And then Mel got up and gave a speech that was also funny and dramatic but in a totally different way. Declan’s nonna baked like fourteen different kinds of Italian pastries, and she made me eat all of them. I will probably need a whole new wardrobe because I gained like twenty pounds overnight. None of it went to my boobs though, unfortunately.
The first song that Maclan danced to was “Come and Get Your Love” and they did the Star-Lord thing together. It was really funny. But also kind of hot. At some point, Declan got up and sang “The Way You Look Tonight” to Maddie. He was kind of drunk and messed up the lyrics, but it was sweet anyway.
I think literally all of the adults in my family are either still drunk, or they are totally hungover. Maddie and Declan left for a couples resort in Antigua. One of his lawyer friends had told him about it. He was at the wedding and whoa! I might have to go into corporate law instead of writing. I wish it wasn’t the middle of winter and that the ceremony was at a pool, because I bet that guy has like a ten-pack of abs.
But back to Maclan. I think both of them are really happy that Maddie changed jobs. This way they can be an actual couple and not worry about who’s supposed to be the boss in their relationship. Because obviously Maddie is. But Declan is still Boss Butt. Wait I’m not supposed to talk about his butt anymore. Oh well. The assistant that Maddie found for him is an older lady. She was at the wedding, and she reminds me of the principal at my school. She keeps him in line at the office and Maddie keeps him in line at home, that’s what my aunt says.
She wrote me a long note in the card along with my bridesmaid gift, thanking me for seeing things with her and Declan even before she was able to. She didn’t exactly acknowledge that I’m the reason they got together, but she did say that if I hadn’t kept stealing her phone to text Declan, they might not have had as good a time together over the holidays last year as they did. So that’s something.
And Declan keeps promising to buy me a car when I get my driver’s license, so that’s cool too.
Well, I guess I should go check on the baby since you’re probably still sleeping, ya big lush.
Yes, I know you’re still reading my journal sometimes, Mom. Maybe this year you’ll stick to your New Year’s resolution of NOT snooping around my room anymore. Love you anyway.
Happy New Year.
EPILOGUE TWO
DECLAN: Babe. You need to come back immediately.
MADDIE: <woman facepalming emoji> Dec. I literally just got in the car. What’s wrong?
DECLAN: She won’t stop staring at me.
MADDIE: Well, you’re her daddy. She probably can’t believe how handsome you are. Also, babies can only see things that are 8 to 12 inches from their faces. If you’re looking at her in the crib, then you’re probably just a big handsome blur to her.
DECLAN: But she’s not blinking.
MADDIE: Pretty sure that’s normal, babe. Newborns only blink like twice a minute.
DECLAN: Are you sure? What if she’s scared of me? I think you should come back.
MADDIE: Babe. I have loved being at home with the two of you all week, but I need to get out of the house for like half an hour. I’m just going to pop over to see Bex and everyone at her place for a few minutes. You’ll both be fine. Just let her go to sleep.
DECLAN: I can’t stop staring at her though. She’s so beautiful. And I don’t want her to think she’s alone.
MADDIE: Well, why don’t you tell her how you feel? You’re so good at that now, remember?
DECLAN: I just told her you guys are the most important people in the world to me, and she rolled her eyes. Wonder where she learned THAT?
DECLAN: Oh wait! She just blinked. She’s fine. It’s cool.
MADDIE: See?! All is well. I’m gonna start driving now. I’ll be back in half an hour. One hour, tops.
DECLAN: Be back in half an hour.
MADDIE: <face with rolling eyes emoji> Bossy!
DECLAN: I think we both know who’s the boss in this family now, and she just pooped her pants. And now she’s crying. Perhaps you can hear her from the car, because holy shit she is screaming. Please just come back now.
MADDIE: I showed you how to change her diaper, Big Daddy. You got this. Sing Ciara a song and give her a kiss for me. I love you.
DECLAN:
