“I’d like to sleep on it,” I finally decide. “It’s a lot to process. If I don’t take the pill, I’ll need to speak to a doctor, find out what’s best.”
“If you want, I’ll go with you.”
“You will?”
“Of fuckin’ course.” His tone questions how I could think anything else. “I’ll be with you, whether there’s something to concern us or not. If you’re mine, babe, that’s it. I’m yours for life.”
I still can’t believe how I got so lucky. How did I get this big bad biker in my life? Do I want to commit to him? What does that mean?
“Where does this leave Alicia?”
He draws in a breath. “With us, of course. I suppose I’ll have to ask her permission if we’re going to tie the knot, but I’ll find some way to persuade her. Look, babe, I know she’s your girl. I can’t step in and be her father, but I can be a man in her life. Heard some shit about stepdads, but the man who ended with my mom wasn’t so bad. Didn’t give a damn at the time, but he did get me out of a fix.”
“The cop? What happened to him?”
“They married shortly after I joined up. Got himself killed on active duty while I was in the military.”
“Your mom?”
“She found some other sucker to marry her soon after his death. He hated bikers. She took his side, and well, I never saw her again. She was happy in her new life and didn’t want me rocking the boat. She died a few years back. I went to the funeral, only to be asked why I’d fuckin’ bothered, and that she’d left nothing for me. As if I wanted anything.”
“Who the hell said that?”
“Her latest husband and my brother. Well, we’ve never been close. I think he resented that he still remained in contact with her, while I had moved on. He got caught in the role of dutiful son, and I suspect got roped into paying money to her. If she’d left anything, he was entitled to it.”
My heart breaks for him and how it seems like he didn’t have a loving family to fall back on. No wonder he thinks so much of his MC. “Sometimes when we’ve seen the worst, it makes us want to do better ourselves.”
“You got that straight, babe. Which is why I won’t be introducing myself to Alicia as a stepdad. She wants a relationship, it’s up to her.”
I yawn, loudly.
“Babe, go to sleep. One thing about problems, they’ll still be here tomorrow.”
And he, in turn, has got that right.
How is it that men, whatever’s on their mind, seem able to go straight to sleep by the time the light is switched off?
The one good thing is—I find as I can’t turn the thoughts off in my head—he doesn’t snore.
Chapter Thirty-Two
Grumbler
It was all systems go in the Styles’ household when I woke up alone this morning. Despite me normally being a light sleeper, Mary had managed to vacate the bed without me knowing. The sounds reaching me are that of mother and daughter already about and talking.
I grab the clothes I was wearing last night and slide into them. Finally, I put on my cut and replace my phone and my wallet, the latter with its traitorous contents, back in my pocket. Then, finger brushing my short hair, I leave the bedroom.
“Breakfast?” Mary asks, cheerily. “Not that it’s much. We make do with toast or cereal in the mornings.”
“Toast is fine.” My eyes narrow as I see Alicia wearing a cheeky grin and holding out her hand to me.
“What?” I shake my head in confusion, sure that I must have missed something.
“Money,” Alicia taps the palm of her hand. “To buy some earplugs.”
“Alicia!” Mary’s eyes about fill her face having widened so completely.
We’d been quiet, I think. Then I fall back on my Satan’s Devils’ spiel where we never deny or confirm a thing. “You didn’t hear anything.” I scoff.
Shrewd teenage eyes look at me, then she giggles. “That’s not telling me anything.”
But I do take out my wallet, extract a twenty and pass it to her.
“Grumbler,” Mary squeaks. “You don’t have to give her money.”
“I know I don’t,” I reply, winking at Alicia. “But the kid could do with a treat. Buy some donuts or something.” Pausing, I add, “Or, earplugs.” I wink at the girl who seems quite cheery this morning. It seems if she’d known we had done the deed, it didn’t bother her.
“You like school?” I pull out a stool and perch on it.
“Well, school’s alright. I want to catch up with Marisa. I’ve missed her this weekend.”
She wouldn’t have missed her if she’d been where she’d said on Friday night, but I keep that to myself. Mary catches my eye, and I suspect she’s thinking the very same thing.
A horn beeping outside tells me the prospect I’d summoned has arrived.
“If you’re not going to keep your lift waiting, you better get a move on,” Mary warns her.
Alicia runs to the window and looks outside, then turns, looking disappointed. “He’s got a truck.”
As Mary rolls her eyes, I chuckle. It’s not difficult to see Alicia was hoping to turn up at school on the back of the prospect’s bike.
The next few minutes are taken up with Mary making sure the kid has everything. Turns out she’s forgotten half her stuff, and the pair of them rush to locate it. Then, just as she’s about to disappear through the door, Alicia runs back to me and gives me an unexpected hug. After an awkward pause, I hug her back.
“I like you for Mom,” she whispers in my ear. “So I might invest in earplugs.”
I bat her off, trying not to laugh, in case I give the words spoken in confidence away. “Go get some learning, kid.”
Then I hear a giggle, followed by a slam of the front door. Now it’s just me
