I slept in the rooms on his and, I presume, Raphael’s floor now that he was staying in the Court of Command. Meanwhile, I imagined, the other soldiers slept in barracks with small hard pillows and gray blankets. I lay comfortably in my bed on fluffy pillows and beneath feather covers. They probably slept in beds with metal springs.
Michael had said I’d graduate to the war-camp training level. Those were the tents on the level just before the city gates. How would I survive those if I was accustomed to what amounted to luxury? In my bedroom, I looked around and decided then and there that I would move to the barracks. I would give up this wonderful warm place in favor of soldiering onward like everyone else. Though it seemed stupid to leave this room, I didn’t see another way. I had to survive this world and survive him most of all. I had to surround myself with other mortals instead of angels, particularly the most powerful one. I had to…stop remembering. I’d already bitten my tongue a million times when I’d almost said something from Before. I would adapt my thoughts, actions, everything, and become one of the mortals from Michael’s world. I couldn’t go on like this. She’s not my girlfriend.
Every soldier owned a backpack. I packed mine with only my uniform and toiletries, then hit the door. I turned and scanned the room. I’d miss it for sure. It was beautiful and warm and sat on what seemed to be the top of the world. I closed the door behind me and headed for the stairs. Michael’s door opened, and he smiled when he saw me, then pointed at the pack on my back. “Going somewhere?”
“Yes, Commander. I’m going to the barracks.”
He shook his head. “Return to your room and meet me at the baths in fifteen minutes.”
I descended the steps.
He appeared before me, blocking the way.
I tried to move past him, but gave up quickly because resistance was futile. “I can’t live in the room at the top of the world and still survive the world you’ve made. I have to grind like everyone else.”
“Ah, I see. But you also can’t control your thoughts or your mouth.”
“And I never will if I’m not given an opportunity to practice self-control. The Before never existed.”
“That’s right.”
“I’m going to keep telling myself that.” Except that my parents had existed, and they must be out there somewhere. Or so I kept hoping.
“Excellent. Hmm, it seems my actions downstairs have motivated you further. You are entitled to other things that seem to motivate you. All the things I can offer are at your disposal.”
“I’m not your girlfriend.” It felt good saying it. I squared my shoulders.
“Of course not, Julia. I do not have girlfriends. I am an immortal archangel.”
“And I am a mortal human.”
“That’s right.”
I hadn’t considered his immortality. A thought occurred to me. “You will live forever.”
He nodded.
“My time is limited, and I don’t have decades to spare healing a broken heart.”
He smiled, and I swore everything around us brightened, including my mood. “It sounds like you’re breaking up with me.”
He was teasing me. Gah, why did he have to be so…so loveable? “I am.”
“Tomorrow,” he said.
“Tomorrow what?”
“Give it until tomorrow.”
I leaned against the wall and bumped the back of my head. “When you are immortal, tomorrow doesn’t even count, but every day counts for me.”
“Perhaps we could discuss days in the baths.”
I chuckled. “I’m not bathing with you, Commander.”
He pressed his body against mine. Warm hands cradled my cheeks; golden eyes bore down on me. “I shall have you know this is my world, and you’re mine. Therefore, I shall have you. Baths or no baths, I will tear down your walls,” he brushed my cheek with his, “and when I do, you’re going down too, soldier.”
I held his wrists, pulling to try to get him to stop touching me. No luck. “I’m just another thing for you to conquer,” I concluded.
“Of course.” He leaned back, looking genuinely surprised I’d even say such a thing.
“It sounds like you have a war plan.”
“Certainly. What kind of other plan is there?”
“That would make me…” I paused, trying to wrap my mind around his way of living, thinking, or his way of being in general.
“My opponent.” He smiled, eyes twinkling. “And winning concludes my war plan.”
“And what happens with me after you win?”
“Nephilim.”
“Hm?”
“Nephilim. The mortal reign over this realm is finished. I will make Nephilim. An angel born of a mortal.”
“Oh, okay. And when you say make, do you snap your fingers and create one?”
“I’m not the maker, Julia. I will breed my soul’s mate. You’re it.”
My brain short-circuited, and I drew blanks, staring at him. “I’m sorry, what?”
“You heard me.”
“I’m not your girlfriend, or wife or…breeder?”
“You’re my soul’s mate.”
“Holy crap.”
“Very holy.”
“You want me to have your babies?”
“Precisely.” Michael kissed my forehead, then wrapped me in a hug. His wings around me, his scent, his skin, his hard body… I didn’t stand a chance. He consumed me. He could heal and comfort and war, and fuck, and make babies.
“Those who remember must die,” I reminded him. “They’re susceptible to Lucifer. What if…”
He pressed a finger over my mouth and whispered in my ear, “Those who remember are lost. You’re very much found.” He picked me up, and I yelped. He
