Tabitha slept and had a chaotic dream. Then she woke with a small, clear thought. Owen Mallon hadn’t been able to pinpoint what time he had met Tabitha that morning after her swim, but he had said that their conversation was drowned out by the noise of helicopters. In her mind, she spooled through the CCTV: those two children in their strollers had both pointed up into the sky. It must have been then. Most probably it meant nothing, but she should remember to write that on the timeline tomorrow.
She couldn’t go back to sleep. There had been something else. She rummaged around in the corners of her memory and couldn’t find it. Above her Dana whimpered and turned over. Tabitha could hear the rain falling outside. April showers. It came to her that she had to write her defense statement by May. What even was a defense statement? And what was her defense? “I can’t remember doing it. I can’t remember anything. It must have been someone else, someone who was stuck in the village as well . . .” She went over the names: Rob Coombe, Luke, Dr. Mallon, Mel the vicar, Shona, Andy . . . She needed to talk to Laura again, to Shona. She needed to see Owen Mallon. She lay with her eyes open, staring into the darkness, and the little timer in her head ticked on.
Thirty-Six
Tabitha was in a hurry when she almost bumped into Ingrid on the landing. She tried to move past, but Ingrid started talking about a girl who had slashed her wrists.
“She was taken to hospital,” she said. “That’s when you know it’s bad. When they take them to hospital they have to fill out a proper report, it goes on the record. If they can fix them up here, they can fudge it.”
“You’re a cynic,” said Tabitha.
“Just realistic.”
Tabitha started to move away. “I’ve got to go. I’ve got a visitor.”
“I’ve been meaning to talk to you,” said Ingrid, almost physically preventing Tabitha from moving past her. Tabitha shifted uneasily. Laura was her visitor. Tabitha had been almost startled when she agreed to come back. The idea of being late and that Laura might leave was nearly unbearable.
“We can talk later,” said Tabitha.
“I might not be here later. I’m having my hearing.”
“That’s good, isn’t it? You might be getting parole.”
“I hope so.”
“But they won’t let you out right away, will they?”
“No, but they’ll move me to an open prison.” Ingrid gave a faint smile. “To prepare me for life back in the real world.”
“That’s fantastic,” said Tabitha, trying to edge away. “Really, good luck. You deserve it.”
“I just wanted to say that I’m sorry I wasn’t more help.”
“You were more help than most people.”
“And you’re really doing this?”
“What?”
“Defending yourself.”
“It’s starting to look like it.”
“You’re sure it’s a good idea?”
“I’m not at all sure. I wasn’t able to convince my lawyer and now I think I can convince a jury. Sounds crazy.” She put a hand on Ingrid’s arm. “I’ve really got to go but, as I said, good luck.” Then she thought of something. “I haven’t got many friends out in the world. If you give me your number, maybe I can give you a call.”
“Anything,” said Ingrid, putting her hand on Tabitha’s. It was a gesture that felt like pity and Tabitha didn’t like it at all.
“Sorry, sorry, sorry,” said Tabitha in a rush, sitting opposite Laura. She expected Laura either to say that it didn’t matter or to issue some kind of rebuke but she didn’t reply at all. She looked paler than when Tabitha had last seen her.
“I told people I was coming to see you,” she said. “I didn’t want to keep it a secret.”
“Of course. I’m glad you’ve come.”
“I told Luke and he didn’t seem to approve but then he doesn’t approve of anything I do, and I told Dr. Mallon at the funeral.” She paused. “I suppose I should say that we finally had the funeral.”
“The funeral,” said Tabitha. “Oh. I didn’t know. How was it?”
“It was good, in a way. That sounds terrible, doesn’t it?” As Laura spoke, she was looking past Tabitha, as if her attention was on someone standing behind her. “There’s so much to prepare and it’s all a bit complicated and it becomes easier to talk to people because you’re talking about arrangements, not about Stuart dying. The day itself was quite relaxing. It was nice listening to the hymns.”
“Did the police come?”
“Just DCI Dudley.”
“The one in a suit with the grim face.”
“He does wear nice suits, yes. I wouldn’t like to comment on his face. He’s been kind to me.”
What had Luke said about him? Yes, that he’d thought the case was a slam dunk.
“Were there lots of tributes?” she asked.
“The vicar said a few words.”
“What did she say?”
“Oh you know, the usual sort of thing. She said he was the heart and soul of the village. She said he kept people on their toes. Including her.”
“What does that mean?”
“As you know, Stuart preferred his services a little more traditional.”
“You told me about his letter to the bishop.”
“There you are then.”
“What else did Mel say?”
“Just the usual things that people trot out. She said he liked to get things done and that he didn’t suffer fools gladly.”
“I’ve heard that before and I’m never quite sure what it means. It sounds like being angry with people who don’t deserve it.”
“I don’t think he was exactly angry.”
“So what was he?”
“I think he saw people’s weaknesses. He had a sort of sixth sense about them.”
“Did he see your weaknesses?”
“Mine aren’t so hard to see,” said Laura. “You don’t need a
