I was gasping. Leo was panting. We stared at each other. The intensity in his eyes made me drop my eyelashes.
‘Does everyone feel like this on their first kiss?’
"Are you okay?" He asked. I raised my eyes and looked at him.
Both of us, standing in the middle of this beautiful greenwood. The cool breeze swayed the tree branches—allowing them to lose their loose leaves to fall, in the background behind Leo's face as he was looking down at me. The view was so beautiful and magical I couldn’t deny the feeling erupting inside me, it wasn’t sexual or erotic—it was spiritual, invoking happiness. My eyes fell on his swollen lips. I touched them, and the sweetness spread on his lips showing his pearly white. I moved up and kissed them. My action not only surprised me but I'm sure he was shocked too. I wanted to feel happy again and he was making me feel blessed. Leo—he had me compelled so easily.
My hands went over his shoulder, slowly my fingers slipped in his hair. It was lovely, kissing him again. Leo grabbed my thigh and picked me up, making me sit on his hips. My tongue entered his mouth, dancing with his own. I sucked on his tongue, and he moaned. Leo carried me forward until my back was against the tree. He stepped closer between my legs and pressed his chest against mine, deepening the kiss. Our tongues mingled once again.
My body was in a quiver of excitement. I think I was falling in love with him. And as soon as this realization dawned on me, I suddenly paused.
He was still dazed, like under my spell. My heart ached to break this special moment, but it was necessary to stop. My feet touched the ground and I shrugged him away.
"We should go," I said and began to walk away. I reacted cold, didn't even spare a glance at Leo, or turned around to look at him.
'It was only a kiss, it means nothing—nothing.' I thought to myself. 'I've to get my act together and stay focused. I'm not going to let a guy ruin my plans.'
But I was already committing mistakes—repeatedly. This heart of mine was slipping away, flying to be with Leo.
'This was a mistake. This kiss was a mistake. A big mistake.'
'No. No. The kiss was magical.'
We reached where the car was parked. I went to open the car door, but it was locked.
"Unlock the car."
"Stop fighting me, Aries."
"This is wrong." I breathed out, managing to find my voice.
"You kissed me..." He said.
"It was a mistake." I snapped.
He yanked my elbow and made me face him.
"Mistake. How could you deny it? Do you really think nothing happened here, Aries?"
"It was a stupid slip-up, Leo. You should just forget about this." I stepped to the side, and just as I was leaving, he came up to me and caught my hand. I was too embarrassed to look at him and kept my head bowed down. He grabbed my chin and made me look up at him. I peered in those damn blue eyes. The spark was now diminished and had a sad look in them.
"You can't deny, Aries. You... Kissed... Me." He came closer, our faces were inches away.
"It didn't mean anything."
"You're lying," he held me, pushed me against the car, and closed in with both of his hands. He was not planning to let me go free.
"You like me. You got feelings for me, admit it. You were kissing me...and with affection." Every word from his mouth tortured me, it evinced the love he had for me.
"Stop it, Leo," I whispered. I felt completely defeated.
"Why are you trying to hide what's in your heart? When you just showed me, the way you feel for me." He nuzzled his nose on my cheek and I closed my eyes.
"There is only sorrow, you won't find anything in it." I dropped my forehead on his shoulder. Tears were rolling down my cheeks.
I knew I was the one causing him stress by being difficult. A big part of me wanted to hold his face in my hands and kiss him again. But I have to be strict because the day he learns the truth about me, he will only hate me, and my heart is too weak to take on that kind of pain.
"I'm not worth it, you're better off without me. I'm not the girl you want, Leo. Your personality is too big to have me."
"Why are you making up stuff? If you don't like me then just say it to my face, Aries. I can handle it." He cut me off, harshly, raising his voice a little.
"Say it!" He shouted.
I looked down, feeling guilty. I felt terrible, watching Leo having a heartache.
I never received anything from anyone all my life. And here he was, dreams in his eyes and love in his heart, and I was rejecting all the goodness he has to offer to me.
"I promise I won't bother you again. Just say the word, Aries."
My head snapped up to look at him. 'No.' He was asking me if he can leave me. 'No... No. I don't want that.'
'Wait, what am I saying? What was I doing?'
In this torture situation, I was facing with this external conflict, with my inner conflict of interest, between my heart and his love.
‘I can't take this anymore, I can't... I need to put a full stop to this.’
"I can't, I can't do this," I said it out loud. I was crying. "I'm not the one for you, Leo."
"Stop saying that." He looked at me. His face was serious. "You're mine, the only one for me."
"Let me go, Leo." I put my hand on his chest to push him away.
"No, I won't." He argued back angrily, grabbed both my wrist, pinned them behind my
