However, she had no time to gather her thoughts properly because Keegan had swooped on a small dais in the bay window. The sun had come out and the view over the gardens to the lake and snow-topped fells was to die for. How could Keegan not fall headlong in love with the place?
‘Is this it?’ Keegan was almost breathless with wonder. ‘Where we actually make our vows?’
‘Yes. This is where the registrar will conduct the ceremony,’ Lottie said. ‘We hold the wedding service in here and in the winter months we serve drinks in the drawing room while this space is rearranged for the reception.’ She glanced out of the window at the sun glinting off the lake. ‘In summer, we do drinks on the terrace; obviously, that’s not possible in December … But you can still have a wide choice of menus, or any kind of reception format – sit-down or buffet. As casual or formal as you wish.’ She reeled off the patter, still feeling as if someone else was saying the words.
‘Oh, I want a formal sit-down. I want silver service, little place names, a top table, speeches – the whole traditional English shebang.’ Keegan called to Connor who was at the window, with his back to them. ‘That’s what your mum’s always dreamed of, isn’t it, Connor? I know my folks will go nuts for it too.’
Connor’s face seemed to have turned pale under his tan. ‘Is there time to get them over here?’ he asked. ‘You know how busy the flights from Oz are at this time of year. Would it be better to delay things a while?’
‘They’ll get here,’ Keegan declared. ‘If I have to fly them all out first class.’
Lottie stopped her jaw from unhinging again. She was used to wealthy clients at Firholme, but Keegan was taking it to another level – she hadn’t even asked how much it would all cost.
‘I’m sure it won’t come to that,’ Connor said hurriedly. ‘I was only thinking through the logistics. Christmas itself is less than eight weeks away. What about all the legal stuff? The licence?’
Joining him, Keegan stroked his arm. ‘We’ve gone through all that, baby. Now we have a venue and date we can book the registrar. I’m sure they’re not busy this time of year, are they, Lottie?’
‘Probably not,’ Lottie said. ‘But I can help you with all of that.’
‘There you are, Connor,’ Keegan said triumphantly. ‘Lottie will take care of everything for us. Aren’t we lucky? Now, I need to touch up my lipstick if you’ll show me the way to the washroom?’
Flicking her hair over her shoulder, Keegan swept off to the cloakroom, leaving Lottie and Connor alone.
The silence was painful before Connor spoke. ‘Keegan’s joking about the first-class flights.’
What? Those were his first words after unexpectedly reappearing in her life after over a year?
‘It’s up to you,’ Lottie said tightly. ‘I totally understand that Keegan would want her family to be at her wedding.’
‘Yes, but there’s no way we’d fly them here first class,’ Connor insisted. ‘Business class maybe.’
‘Connor, you really don’t have to apologise or explain anything,’ Lottie said, wishing she hadn’t been left alone with him. ‘I’ll do anything I can to make sure you have a happy day and that your mum has a wonderful Christmas surprise. I’m so sorry she’s been ill. I wish I’d known.’ Lottie just stopped herself from putting her hand on his arm in comfort. With her own mother living so far away, Lottie’s relationship with Fiona had probably been closer than it might normally have been. ‘I wish I’d known. I would have gone to see her or sent some flowers and a card. Poor Fiona.’
‘She understood why you didn’t …’ Connor glanced away guiltily. ‘Why I hadn’t told you. In the circumstances, she knew it would have been really awkward for you.’
Really awkward for Connor, she thought, but stayed tight-lipped. Her natural sympathy for him and his parents trumped any bitter feelings towards him. However, she’d resolved to take control of the situation they’d both found themselves in.
‘How close we once were is irrelevant now,’ she said, although she felt that her relationship with Connor was all too relevant, given the hurt and anger she still felt.
‘True … and I apologise. I never should have turned up without making an appointment, but Keegan was all for haring up here the moment I happened to say that Mum loved Firholme. She said we could look round, have a coffee and then when she mentioned about possibly getting married to that guy on reception, he said he would find someone to show us round – the wedding events manager, he said; he didn’t use your name or I would have twigged.’
‘You still wouldn’t have been able to stop Keegan from getting married here, though, would you?’
‘No … I suppose not. When she gets her teeth into an idea, it’s very hard to stop her.’
It was on the tip of Lottie’s tongue to say ‘I can imagine’ but she stopped herself. Henceforth, she had to be scrupulously professional with her ‘bridal couple’ and that meant being enthusiastic and welcoming. She was finding it almost impossible with Connor, however.
‘Jeez, Lottie. I’m so sorry for landing here like this unannounced. It’s unforgivable. I’d never want to hurt you; you must understand that?’
But you did hurt me, Connor, she thought. You’re still doing it now. Words dried in her throat. She’d finally got her life back on track, but now he’d ripped the dressing from a still-healing wound. The pain was sharper than she’d ever imagined it could be – because she hadn’t imagined it, she’d half hoped she’d never have to see him again because it was easier for her. She didn’t think she could bleed again at a look or touch from Connor; now she knew she could.
‘I can tell Keegan we can’t hold the wedding here if you really want me to,’ he said, but with a look
