Avery’s voice faded away, so I looked over at her just in time to see Deon and Sicily walking out of the front office. Avery stopped us from moving any further just as Deon’s eyes landed on us.
“Hi, Deon. Hi, Sicily,” Avery greeted. “How are you guys?” Sicily opened his mouth to speak, but Avery held up her hand. “Why don’t you go second?” she asked, and then she turned an interested gaze to Deon.
Deon looked at Avery for a few seconds, and then his dark gaze fell on me. Behind the tough guy was nothing but disappointment and sadness. I’d almost feel better if he were just plain angry, but what I got instead was way worse. After looking at me for about thirty seconds, damn near causing me to break out into a sweat, he turned his back to us and walked toward the front door to the school and out of sight.
Sicily winced. “Oh, hey, ya know. He’s just a little anti-social. Don’t let it bug ya. See ya, ladies,” With that, he turned and raced after Deon.
“Ouch.” I looked over my shoulder, and Colette was coming up to stand on my right.
“What was that about?” Alistair had walked up and was now on Avery’s left, holding her hand. “He didn’t look too happy.”
“Who knows?” Avery answered for me. “Come on. Let’s go get something to eat. I’m starving.”
“Me too,” Alistair added. “I’ve been wanting to try that new sushi place.”
“Hey!” Colette yelped. “They’re competitors, you know.”
“Obviously,” Alistair responded. “That’s why I want to try it so I can trash it and talk about how much better your family’s place is.”
“You’re a horrible liar, Ali,” Colette growled.
“So I’ve been told.” He pulled on Avery’s arm. “You in?” He looked up at me. “Cherri?”
I waved a hand forward. “Uh, you guys go ahead. I’ll catch up. I just wanna talk to Colette for a few minutes.”
Avery raised an eyebrow at me. “You sure?”
“Totally. Text me and let me know where you end up.”
Avery shook her head. “Okay,” she said, and she and Alistair walked out of the school hand in hand.
When they’d been gone for enough time, I linked my arm through Colette’s arm and started to walk toward the front door as well. Avery was my best friend, and she always gave me sound, logical advice about the right thing to do and the best way to do it. She was calm, cool, and collected, and sometimes, when you were specifically trying not to do the right thing, it was best to seek advice from someone like Colette, who made her legacy in being a little more self-serving.
“What’s up?” Colette asked. “I take it things aren’t going well with Mr. Prison?”
Side-stepping the insult, I pressed on. “No. I’m pretty sure I fucked that up for good, so it looks like I’m sticking it out with Nathan. I guess that’s what I’m hoping you can help me with.”
“Honey, I’m not into threesomes,” Colette said.
“No,” I replied. “Not help like that. I, just… How do you do it? How do you separate yourself from an emotional response to something and just view it for what it is? How do I make staying with Nathan make sense since, clearly, that’s what the rest of this year is going to look like for me?”
“Sweetheart, everything in life has a purpose, and if there’s anything I’ve learned, it’s that when it comes to relationships, the purpose is either true love, like what you would maybe have with Mr. Prison, or the purpose is everything else.”
“I don’t get it.” We walked through the parking lot and over to my car and stopped.
“Just view your relationship with Nathan like a business arrangement. Goods and services. Currency in exchange for product. You’re the currency. Having you around. You’re beautiful, smart, charismatic. I think very highly of myself, and even I know that you’re the total package. So in exchange for having you around, you get to partake in Nathan’s services. You have needs, so let him satisfy them. If you want something shiny, let Nathan buy it. If you need references for college, let Nathan’s court earn you notoriety. If he’s willing to spoil you in exchange for your presence, that’s not a bad deal.”
“Okay,” I said, starting to get it. “But what if Nathan is not satisfying, rarely buys me shiny things, and I can already get college references on my own?”
She chuckled. “You can walk most any place, but a car will get you there faster.”
That phrase washed over me like a muddy wave of enlightenment. “Reap the benefits?”
“Exactly, just ask for what you want.” She shrugged. “And maybe buy a vibrator.”
I sighed. Just getting close with Deon was the most excitement I’d ever experienced in the bedroom. I hated thinking that was behind me forever. “Yeah.” I pulled Colette in for a hug. “Okay. Thanks for the advice.”
She smiled. “Of course, cutie.” She winked at me. “I’m not going to that sushi place, so tell Avery and Alistair that I said I’ll see them tomorrow.”
“Will do,” I replied, waving as Colette walked off toward her own car.
Thinking of living life the way Colette described made me feel like I was laying a permanent coat of dirt over my skin, but regardless of that, I couldn’t deny the sense it made. I went to her for that sort of advice, after all, and nothing she said was false. Nathan wasn’t anyone’s prized possession, but if the weeks following his little outburst at the store had shown me anything, it was that his remorse was often paved with gold. If I was going to be stuck with him for the foreseeable future—things clearly weren’t going to work out with Deon—then what was the harm in getting some benefit out of the relationship?
When I climbed into my car, I noticed that I had a text from Avery, telling me
