“I’ve got to admit,” Stana says, “it was kind of brilliant. I mean, would you have given him a shot if he hadn’t gone on and on about this girl?”
I bite my cheek. “Honestly? I don’t know. It’s Owen—he’s easy on the eyes, in a band, and successful. I doubt it would be hard for him to find someone. So who knows, but I won’t say I’m mad he gave me the little push.”
Em grins. “I just love it, the two of you together. I mean, what friend group has the entire group paired off with one another?”
“Uh, like every cheesy teen romance movie or TV show?” I offer, knowing that our situation is not the norm.
“Whatever.” Em waves her hand, dismissing me. “Anyway, I think it’s romantic.”
“Me too,” Stana gushes.
“You two.” I playfully roll my eyes but don’t hide my smile, knowing deep down I feel the same way.
Despite a peaceful four months since Rosie’s birth, I knew there was bound to be a bad day in our future. I just didn’t realize it would be today. She’s absolutely hysterical for no reason, red faced and angry. I’m near tears when Owen buzzes on my door after the day we’ve had.
I pat Rosie on her back as I walk to the door, hopeful it will get her to stop crying. She’s been fed and had a fresh nappy, so I have no idea why she won’t settle.
“Jesus, Lottie, are you okay?” He eyes me, then Rosie.
“I can’t get her to stop crying.” I hiccup as he reaches forward and takes her out of my arms. She still cries but begins to calm down.
“What the hell?” I say. “I’ve been doing exactly what you’re doing for over an hour.” I wipe my sleeve across my snotty nose, recoiling at the thought of how I must look right now.
“Babe,” Owen says, placing his free hand on my shoulder, “why don’t you go take a shower? I’ll do my best to soothe her.”
“But what if she needs me?” I ask, worried about even leaving the room.
“I promise if she needs you, I will bring her in right away, okay?”
I nod, my chest still shakily moving up and down.
“Is someone giving their mum a hard time?” I hear Owen whisper to Rosie as I walk into the bathroom. I can’t help but laugh at his baby voice toward her. She has him wrapped around her little finger.
I don’t waste any time throwing off my stained clothes and getting under the spray of the hot water, relishing in every single moment. Yet, not wanting to leave them alone for too long, I quickly wash my hair and hop out. The cold bathroom tiles jolt me back as I wrap the towel around myself to dry off before dressing.
“Sorry that took so long,” I say as I exit the bathroom, rubbing the towel through my locks. I quickly look around the room, finding Owen making tea in the kitchen, Rosie nowhere to be seen.
“Where is she?” I asked, my voice slightly panicked.
Owen walks over with a steaming hot cup of tea and takes my hand with his free one.
“She’s asleep. I promise she’s okay.”
“She slept for you?” I can’t keep the shock out of my voice. I’m her mum and I tried for hours, and she went down for him within minutes?
“Lottie, I can guarantee it wasn’t me. She was so exhausted, I think she honestly didn’t have a choice.”
I look around the room, still not believing she’s asleep.
“But why didn’t she sleep for me?” My lip can’t help but wobble at the question.
Owen’s eyes soften when I snuggle into his side. “Because you’re her mum and she probably wanted to stay up with you. She loves you the most in this world, you know that.”
I sniffle a few times, knowing he’s just being nice. I probably smelled and Rosie could sense my own hysterics coming on.
“Do you want something to eat?” he asks.
Shaking my head, I cuddle into the couch.
“Why don’t I turn on a show and we can just relax? I’ll keep an eye out for Rosie, okay?”
I nod, feeling my eyes already closing as I lean into him. Next thing I know, it’s lights out.
I wake up with a jolt, my body jumping off the couch, the apartment now dark. That tells me I’ve been asleep for some time. Owen is no longer on the couch, but a pillow is under my head, along with a blanket on top of me.
I doubt he would leave without telling me, so I walk out of the living room and push open the slightly ajar door to my bedroom.
The sight before me nearly brings me to tears. Owen is asleep in the rocking chair, Rosie protectively held against his shoulder as she too is out like a light. An empty bottle sits next to him, my mind thankful I don’t need to go over her feeding schedule with him. Owen being Owen, I said it once and he didn’t forget.
As if sensing my presence, Owen stirs, his eyes opening while a sleepy smile lines his lips. “Hey,” he whispers, voice husky.
“Hi,” I mouth, unable to move from the spot I’m in. It’s these small moments when I see him with her that I wish it. I wish he were hers. And that brings me back to the fact she has a dad, one who refuses to be here. The thought alone crushes me, because how could any father not want this beautiful girl? How could anyone abandon her?
I motion my head toward the bed, somewhere Owen and I have yet to share. But it’s late, and there is no way I’m making him leave now. He seems to understand, slowly standing with Rosie in his arms. I hold my breath while he places her back into her cot, still sound asleep.
I don’t hesitate to get
