“So much for breakfast,” I yawned. “But I might have time to whip something together,” I whispered.
“If you do it naked and I can watch.”
“I think I can arrange that.” I started to move, sliding off the bed, but he grabbed me and had me pressed against his chest again.
“I changed my mind. I’ll have you for breakfast.”
“But I have an appointment at the office.”
“Cancel it.”
I knew I had to tell him. Now was as good a time as ever, or he’d never understand why I had to rush off. He’d go digging, and I didn’t want him showing up at the station while in the middle of the interview. I searched his face just in case it was the last time I’d see how lovingly he smiled at me. I sat up, looking down on him as he settled his arms beneath his head on the pillow.
“What’s up, Shannon?”
“I have to tell you something. You might not like it.”
“Oh? I doubt you could ever say or do anything I wouldn’t like. So why do you think that?”
“Trust me, I’ve gotten to know a little about you.”
He remained relaxed on the outside, but I could sense he was very alert on the inside. He drew the back of his hand across my cheek and brushed against my lips as I kissed his lingering fingers. “Yes, you have. And I believe it goes both ways.”
He waited.
“I have taken on an interview this morning. It was arranged before I knew you were coming, or I certainly wouldn’t have done it. But it’s a human interest story.”
In my silence, he whispered, “What, Shannon?”
“It’s a story on your housing project for Navy SEALs. And I’m interviewing Rebecca today at ten. That’s who I’m meeting.”
At first, he didn’t believe me. Then his eyes got dangerous and he began to breathe deeply. He stared at the ceiling and stopped touching me. I knew telling him was the right thing to do because he’d find out anyway. But I so regretted having to tell him at that moment. Out of the side of my vision I could see he’d focused on me again with something deep and penetrating. I slowly returned his gaze and started to explain further. I was even prepared to give an apology, but he put a finger to my lips.
“Does she know?” he asked.
“Does she know what, Marco?”
“About this. Us. Boston.” His voice was a little louder, anxious and scratchy.
“No. Never in a million years.”
His eyes didn’t wander from mine. I knew he was serious. “I want you to tell her, after the interview. Tell her you love sucking my cock, tell her we’re gonna screw all day and all night.”
While I was mildly pleased he didn’t toss me from the bed and leave, I could see that I had hurt him and he was reacting like I knew he would. A wounded bear. As he began to say something in anger, it was my turn to stop him with my fingers to his lips.
“No, Marco. She has nothing to do with us. Nothing about us has anything to do with her, unless you bring her in.”
His eyes sparkled, new light brightening the darkness at the centers. He cocked his head to the side to listen.
“I’m going to just go in and do my job. She’ll find out, or not, but not from me and not this morning before or during the interview. You have my permission to tell her if you want, because that’s not my call. It’s yours.”
“Really? You’d let me do that?”
I couldn’t tell if he was being sarcastic because his mood was still stormy but I relied on the color in his eyes and those tiny smile lines at the sides of his lips. And his voice. He was soft, if not raspy. He was patient, staging himself in case he had to control an outburst. I could tell all this just because I’d seen it years ago when he argued with Em about getting married. He’d held her off, and although she cried into his arms, he promised to return to her after that first deployment. And he did.
She was the one who didn’t return. They never had counted on that.
“Why spoil our chances with each other, Marco? This is all new, exciting, and exactly what I want. Don’t let her spoil it, like she’s spoiling the rest of your life. Don’t give her that much power.”
He reached out to touch my arm, and then changed his mind and covered his eyes with his forearm. I wasn’t going to let him know his emotions were showing no matter how much he tried to hide them up. That was part of the Marco I wanted to be with.
“So, don’t bring that woman into our bedroom,” I said as I peeled his arm from his face, took his hand in mine and kissed his palm. He watched. Then his powerful fingers slid up my neck, into my hair, where he took fistfuls and pulled me down so he could ravage me with kisses.
“I need to fuck you, Shannon. Hard,” he whispered in my ear, flipping my body over onto my back.
“Oh God, yes!” I said, relieved, my arms pulling him down on top of me. It was the only answer I was capable of giving him. My body wasn’t nearly enough, but I didn’t mind sharing my complete surrender to him. He could take a chance on me and I wanted him to feel like he could take me any time.
I was his vessel. I didn’t stop him to put on a condom he never asked for because it didn’t matter what the outcome was. Judie would tan my hide if she ever found out how risky it was, but I just didn’t care how un-modern and stupid I was being because there were some things more important than being appropriate.
My tears were hot
