He calls to confirm the time of her arrival, anxious and apologetic, “I realize it is a burden and a nuisance,” he says. “You know how I feel about public occasions. Sometimes one must conform to other people’s weaknesses...” She assures him there is no need for him to worry, even if in every other respect he could not count on her as a daughter, she understands what is required of her on public occasions. Not to be present at this event would be unthinkable. “That’s what I think, too,” he says with satisfaction. “Did you get my letter?” he asks, “I wrote you a long letter in answer to your questions. You should get it tomorrow. Why are you suddenly interested in these things?...I could tell so much more. But you will be here soon.”
...YOU ASK how did my mother manage in Galanta. She had twelve children. Two died. She was either pregnant or breastfed the babies. Therefore she hardly had menstruations. Mother did not stay in bed more than a day after delivery. She got up and worked. When visitors came she jumped quickly into bed to be congratulated.
THE APPLE SCENE
Mother prepared our school lunch. We were at the exit door to leave for school. Before me were two or three brothers. Mother handed our bags to us. I was the last in line. Mother stood near me and gave me an apple, what the others did not get. (Fruit was a rare thing.) The others noticed this, Mother and I were embarrassed. All my brothers—in front of me—hated me, though they didn’t show this. Only by innuendos. I was in the middle. The elders wanted to rule over me, the youngers to exploit me. All were in my way. I fought against both sides. I was isolated, but I was the stronger. (“Der Starke ist am mächtigsten allein”—Freud about himself, quoted Goethe.)
LITTLE SAMUEL’S DEATH
I could have been two or three years old. I had a little charming brother whom I loved more than anything else. He got sick. At that time, we did not have any serum against diphtheria, whooping cough; no antibiotics. He was dying. He was put in the studio in a wooden crib. People gathered in the studio. They were reciting (as is customary) psalms. My mother and two sisters were standing by, close to each other. The life of Samuel (it means “the name of God”) was close to the end. An elderly Jew held a goose feather in hand to see when the breathing of Samuel did not move the feather any more. Suddenly he cried out the S’ma Yisrael (Harken Israel), which meant that my brother expired. And I was there, unnoticed, observing. I felt that life is utterly impossible, bitter, the dangers are tremendous; that these people should be able to do better and not to let my little, beloved brother die.
I spent my life with the other boys in the yard of the synagogue where our family lived. I went twice daily to service. In the synagogue there was burning the eternal light. The light flickered. I was told that the spirits of the dead are dwelling there and when the living come in for the service, the spirits of the dead have to be reminded that the living are coming in for the service and the spirits have to leave. One was supposed not to meet them. So I followed the shamesz, the man who had, among many other things, the duty to open the door of the synagogue. There was a thick and heavy door. The man had a big key. He knocked on the door with this heavy key, reminding, urging the spirits to leave. There was already a considerable hole due to previous knocking on the door. In the synagogue, there was a sort of chair on which the circumcision took place. The removed foreskins were collected in a box attached to the back part of the chair. With several boys we once raided this chair and dispersed the dried-up foreskins on the floor.
HOW OLD WOMEN URINATED IN GALANTA ON THE STREET
I often witnessed the following scene. (There wasn’t a possibility in Galanta to find a facility for urination, besides at home.) It was always with two women together; they met and chatted. When they left, I found a puddle at the place where they were standing. It was dry before. Later on as a medical student, I understood that in old women there is a possibility to accomplish this without (much) soiling themselves. (Women wore long dresses.)
FATHER’S WALK FROM THE HOUSE TO THE SYNAGOGUE
He started to pray the moment he left the house for the synagogue. And he did so until he reached his prominent place in the synagogue. Nobody would have disturbed him. Leaving the synagogue, he stopped for a few minutes to talk to a member. It was like when a king would do such a thing. (Today a rabbi of a reform congregation would stop and tell even a dirty joke to a member.)
GRANDFATHER, THE FAMED REB SIMON OF NYITRA
I did not know him; he died shortly after I was born.
He didn’t leave behind any writings, but the following hochmes (wise sayings) were often repeated in our house. When disciples came to ask him what a man needed in order to be happy he answered, “A yid soll man sein und appetit soll man haben.” (One should be a Jew and one should have a good appetite.) He used to say that he couldn’t understand how a goy can be happy: he does not eat kosher food and does not apply tefillin (phylacteries).
He didn’t understand birds. From his study window he would see a bird fly from one branch to the next, rest a while and fly on to another branch. Why couldn’t the bird stay where it
