“And, I suggested it was time to have a chat and deal with what really made him scared to deliver babies in the practice.”
Aggie’s mouth dropped open and she turned to April. “No way!” She closed her mouth and held her hand over it, looked at April again, and shook her head. “Oh my goodness! I never put two and two together. How clever are you?”
“It just made sense to me. I’m interfering and I don’t have the right too, but I’d be slack if I didn’t try to help him. You should have seen him, Aggie. He was pale, shaking like a leaf with a cold sweat on his forehead. And there was Sally, bleeding out before our eyes.” She took her glass back and gulped a mouthful down, brushing off the drops of condensation that dripped onto her lap with her other hand.
“But once he leaned in and committed to that first cut, it was like magic, a different Drew delivered that baby and saved her life. It was simply amazing.”
“Wow.” Aggie took the glass back, had a sip, and handed it over again.
“Yeah, wow. I want that Drew all the time. The confident, full of the joys of life person that I loved. He can’t be that man if he’s still hanging onto things he has no control over. Hence my suggestion to Bradley.”
“Hmmm. You know what I think?” Aggie turned to face her.
“No, what?”
“I think you did the right thing. He might be pissed about it now, but given time to chew it over, Drew will understand you did it with the best of intentions.”
April passed back the glass. “I hope you’re right.”
Aggie drained the glass. “Guess what he said to me?”
“Bradley? No idea.”
“He said I knew where he was when I decided I was ready.” She started chewing on her thumb nail, her focus on the harbor.
“Maybe it’s a good idea. You can’t keep it tucked away forever. Look what it’s doing to you, honey.”
Aggie jolted to her feet. “I don’t want to discuss it. I’ve told you why before.”
“Yes you did, but you don’t have any semblance of a decent life. You hide away in that bakery during the night and sleep all bloody day. What kind of existence is that?”
“You of all people know why I can’t be anything else. Don’t even start that crap with me.” She bolted off the porch and stormed down the pathway to the road.
What had she done? April knew it was risky to bring it up, especially now, but her lover wasn’t the only one who needed to deal with issues. Aggie had more than most and it killed her to think that she would live her life alone because of it. At least her brother had been open to sharing his pain eventually. Aggie buried hers so deep, most people had no idea she was living on the edge of her nerves and that scar tissue could tear at any time.
But it would seem that Bradley saw more than most.
Chapter 21
The weeks dragged on as winter started to make herself known. Drew treated her normally at work and during their off time he was attentive and kind. Even so, April noticed a distance in his eyes. When he made love to her it always felt as though there was someone else in the room. One night at his house overlooking the point, April brought it up.
“Drew, we can’t go on like this. I love you dearly, but it’s like you’re not really here.”
He sat up in the bed, turning away from her. “You’re being silly. Of course I’m here.”
April grabbed the sheet around herself and got out of the bed, walking over to the window. “You might be here in body, sadly your mind is somewhere else. Have you seen Bradley again?”
He sighed and rubbed his hands over his face. “I don’t need to see him.” Drew looked away. “I’m sorry. I’m still having trouble getting my head around everything that happened. If you could just give me some more time to sort it out in my mind.”
“And that’s what Bradley’s for. Come on, Drew, you’re the one who got my kids talking to him. Surely you can see how useful that one on one is with him?” Frustrated she walked into the bathroom and picked up her clothes. He wasn’t going to listen to her, she could see that.
He stood up, and walked toward her. “Yes, but…
“I don’t like being pushed away. You might not mean it, but it hurts, okay?”
“I’m not pushing you away.”
She brushed past him, tossing her clothes on the bed. “You are. Every time you turn away or don’t answer me, that’s pushing me away. Every time you withdraw into yourself when we’re together, that’s pushing me away. I don’t understand what’s going on anymore.”
“You know what happened. I’m trying to deal with it. If you keep treating me like this, it won’t help.”
“No, I see that now. And I’m sorry if you think I’m nagging. I don’t mean to.” She’d hoped that since he’d moved into the house, he was dealing with his pain. It seemed she was wrong.
He turned on the shower. Moments later he was standing under the water, his head directly under the shower head where he couldn’t hear her words. She dropped the sheet to the floor and grabbed her clothes, pulling them on as she stumbled from the room. April skipped down the stairs and ran outside to her car.
The drive home was rough. She ignored the ringing of her cell phone and pulled up outside her house. Taking a moment to compose herself, she wiped away the tears and put on her game face. Atticus would notice right away that she had been crying, he always did.
It took her a couple of minutes to slow her heart before she felt comfortable going inside. Atticus sat on the couch, a book in his hand. Beside him on the couch, lay Leo fast asleep.
“What happened?
