“Do you want to tell Hamish how many times she left you alone, Alex, in pursuit of her career? Highly unacceptable, no matter what you say.”
“Gran…”
“It’s okay. Relax and we’ll get through this.”
Alex whirled on Hamish. “No, it’s not okay. Gran keeps blaming Mom, but she wasn’t there. She didn’t know what really happened.” Anguish shone in his eyes.
“Why don’t you tell us, then?” Hamish deferred to Frederick. “If you don’t mind, that is.”
Frederick shook his head. “I think a good clearing of the air would be beneficial right now. Go ahead, Alex, tell us what really happened that night.”
Alex dropped his gaze to the pup on his knee. “She got a phone call, quite late it was. I’d gone to bed, but she came in and told me she was going out and wouldn’t be long. I could have gone next door to the neighbours’ if I wanted or they would have come over. I said I was alright by myself. I’m not a little kid anymore.” He swallowed and Hamish kept his eye on him ready to intervene if it became too much for the boy.
“I’ve been alone before. Being at home while she met an informant to gather information wasn’t a big deal. Usually she wasn’t out for that long anyway. All part of her job, you know.”
“Can you back up a bit and tell me exactly how she reacted at the funeral because that happened before this episode if I have it correct, didn’t it?”
Lucy sat up and spat the words out before Alex could speak. “She never went! Left poor Alex to bury his father alone. It was disgraceful.”
“Lucy, let the boy talk.” Her husband tried to calm her.
Alex twisted in his seat, his eyes screaming out for understanding. “It wasn’t her fault. It was because she loved him so much, I guess. At least that’s what the doctor said to me. She was getting dressed that morning, made sure I was ready for the funeral and then went to her room. I heard a thud and ran in. She’d, uh …” tears filled his eyes, but he swallowed and carried on, “she’d collapsed on the floor of the bathroom. I called an ambulance and they came, took her to hospital. Doctor said it was delayed shock or something.” He wiped a hand across his face and sniffed loudly.
Hamish ached for him.
“The doctor wanted to keep her in for a few days so I phoned the funeral director and told him we might have to postpone Dad’s service because of what happened, but it was too late. They told me they couldn’t do it, everything was ready. So I went by myself.”
“You did well, then. Your mother must have been proud of you, Alex.” Hamish could only imagine the impact that would have had on most teens.
“She came home from the hospital three days later.”
“And we arrived the day after that.” Lucy glanced up at her husband. “It was as though nothing had happened. Billie was her normal cheery self.”
“I doubt that, Lucy. Some people have trouble dealing with grief and I believe she is one of them. It doesn’t mean she didn’t care - she just didn’t know how to cope with everything that had been thrown at her. It’s not as uncommon as you would think.”
“I think she put herself in danger afterwards too.” Frederick spoke up, casting apologetic glances towards his grandson. “Her behaviour became risky and sometimes downright dangerous from what I’ve heard. It’s almost as if she thought she was invincible.”
“Which is what I was trying to say. She went out because someone had information about a story she was working on. It had to do with some big government thing, some politician who Mom thought was crooked. Anyway, when I woke up she still wasn’t there. I went to school and figured she’d be home that night. Instead the police knocked on the door just after I got home from school.”
“The police?” Hamish gaped at Frederick. Why hadn’t he been told this?
“Sorry. My hands were tied.” Frederick blushed, embarrassed.
“Never mind now. Tell me what happened, Alex.”
“They’d charged her with murder.” His shoulders drooped in defeat or embarrassment, Hamish couldn’t be sure which.
“What?” Surely that couldn’t be right. Not the Billie he knew. It didn’t fit.
“Someone reported hearing gun shots in a back alley and called the police. When they arrived, Mom was sitting on the ground with the body of her snitch, a gun in her hand and they blamed her. She didn’t do it of course, but they arrested her anyway until it was sorted out. Gran and Grandad had already gone home. Mom had said she was fine, so I was on my own again.” He shrugged his shoulders as if it was no big deal.
“We only left because she insisted she was alright, Alex. Billie is very good at making people believe her. You know we wanted to bring you home with us.” Lucy sat forward in her seat but Frederick held her hand. “It shows how she was under enough stress to do this before and she could do it again, leave her son only thinking of herself, which is what I believe she’s done.” Lucy didn’t seem to want to let go of the Billie running away, idea.
“I don’t think so. Mom was excited about this job. Even though she wasn’t at the same level as she was in America, she felt like she was settling in and getting to know people. She wouldn’t leave me like this, Gran. I know she wouldn’t. Besides, she called me and told me she had to finish something before she came home.”
“She left you before, darling and that phone call seemed suspect in my opinion. And lets not forget how long ago it was.”
“But this was different, I know it was and no matter what you think, she had nothing to do
