* * *
An hour later Billie had showered and dressed, she was determined to explain. “I have to go back to the house. Don’t you see that, Hamish? Something happened to me there.” Billie pleaded with her hands, desperate for him to understand. “I need to find out what it was. How on earth can I go back to Sydney and not figure it out? It’ll kill me to leave it like this.”
“The doctor said you need to rest.” Hamish kept his calm while her mind was a mass of swirling questions that demanded answers. She had to make him understand.
“I get that, but he also said I was fine.” Billie crossed her arms, annoyed at his logic. “Lucy and Father won’t be here until late afternoon. They can meet us at the house, for goodness sake. Leave a message at the office for them.”
“I think we should wait.”
“No. There’s something I have to deal with. How do I explain it to them, the final piece to the puzzle? If I don’t sort it out, I’ll never feel like me again. Does that make sense to you?” How could she explain it to him when she didn’t understand herself?
He tapped his finger against his cheek but didn’t say anything. Just stared at her with that calm look of his until she wanted to scream and throw her shoe at him. “Can I ask you something?”
“Sure. I think we’re past having secrets after all that we’ve been through, don’t you?”
“You say something happened at the house. This may not sound very professional but bear with me for a moment. Was it anything like what happened to you at the Easter Show when you blanked out?”
Wind rushed in her ears and her stomach flipped, making her swallow down the rush of bile surging up her throat. The dark space at the back of her mind seemed to open, forming a tunnel to memories that wouldn’t stay closed.
“Billie?” Hamish reached for her, but she held up a hand.
“Don’t touch me.” Was it possible that he was onto something? For the life of her she’d tried to figure out what was going on but she couldn’t. “If you must know the truth, it started when Stephen died and I made the decision to move here. I put it down to stress at first. Now I’m not so sure. I just know I have to figure it out before I go insane.”
“There has to be something triggering these episodes. I wish I knew what it was.”
“Are you going to take me back?”
He studied her from under hooded lashes. He frowned and bit his lip, still not giving her the answer she wanted. “Fine, then. I’ll get a taxi.” She twisted away, bitterly disappointed and strode to the door.
“Okay.” Hamish stared at her with his cool gaze. “I’ll take you. But I have to warn you, Billie, I’m not sure that what you’re doing is right.”
“I never said it was, Hamish. Some things aren’t found in your medical tomes. Sometimes you have to go with your gut and this is what I’m doing. I was dragged back to that house for a reason and I have to finish what I started.” She opened the door and called to Alex to get in the car.
When they drove up to the house, she could feel the same magnetic pull that had grabbed her from the start, only this time she understood it better. A sense of coming home, of belonging washed over her. She had to recreate what she’d walked away from this morning or she would never settle down.
Hamish parked beside her car. “Right. What can we do to help you?”
“I don’t know.” She opened the door and got out, stood looking at the house. “Wander around and see what happens, I guess.” Billie smiled as Alex let Maggie out of the car. She immediately scarpered after a duck sitting at the edge of the lake, rolling down the dry bank as the duck flew away. “She’s such a character. I’m so glad you picked her up, Hamish. She’s just what he needs.”
Hamish stood beside her. “Every boy needs a dog. I’m afraid I’m biased in that regard.” He slid his hands in his pockets, making no move to touch her and for that, Billie was grateful.
“I know this is hard for you to understand and you probably think I’ve totally lost the plot. I don’t blame you and I’m grateful that you haven’t said it out loud even if it’s what you’re thinking. I really am.” She noted the small lift of his lips at her words. “I feel I have a connection to this house and it has something to do with my mother, with Lucy and why she’s so secretive.” She glanced at the window above the door on the second level, a shiver going over her skin. “I feel as though I’m living in a parallel world or something. I don’t know what the connection is but it has to do with my mother’s secrets. I’m positive it does.”
“It would be helpful if she would tell us what happened to her sister.” He cleared his throat. “And for the record, I don’t think you’ve lost your mind. There are some things that science can’t explain. I get that and even understand to some extent that these kind of things exist.” Hamish rocked back and forth on his heels. “So whatever you want me to do, you only have to ask.”
Billie glanced at him again and saw something she hadn’t noticed before in his eyes. Understanding, a deep sense of kindness and dare she say it, belief? Her stomach did a flip and she pressed a hand to her belly and tried to stay the butterflies that soared under his cool stare.
“Thank you.” Her gaze followed Alex as he ran with Maggie through the rose gardens. “Did you leave a message for Frederick and Lucy to meet us here or
