She had to make a decision about them and when she did, he had to know all about her past. No way would Del go into a relationship with dark secrets lurking behind closed doors. No way would she put herself in the path of a broken heart like that ever again. It had to be all or nothing. Now all she had to do was work out if it was worth putting her heart on the line and leaving herself wide open.
The thought of being hurt again, being put second because of what she wanted— as Peter had done—and now it seemed Blake would do the same, putting his children first. She couldn’t blame him, but the words still stung, no matter how much she ran them through all the logical loops in her mind.
Sad and frustrated, Del walked into the bathroom, stripped off her clothes, and brushed her teeth. Dressed in her cotton nightgown, she sat on the bed with her laptop to send off a copy of the contract to John. When she pushed the send button, Blake still hadn’t walked past her door. She tidied her room and lay down, her heart heavy as she tried to sleep, wishing for more than she thought she deserved.
* * *
In the morning, the sound of tapping on her bedroom door woke her. “Come in.” Del struggled to sit up, brushing her hair from her face. Her head throbbed from the restless sleep and disturbed dreams.
Lilly opened the door and stuck her head around the corner. Her face lit up when she saw Del sitting up in bed. She threw open the door and launched herself onto the bed, snuggling up with her arms wrapped around Delilah’s neck.
“Hey, chicken, what’s wrong?”
Lilly sobbed as she buried her head against her.
“She thought the snake killed you. That was the nightmare last night.” Blake stood in the doorway, aloof as he leaned there, arms crossed and lips pulled in a tight line.
Delilah’s heart clenched, warmth flooding her body while her stomach dropped and left a hollow ache in her womb. The tug at her maternal instinct to cuddle and comfort felt foreign to her, yet soothing at the same time. “Oh, baby. I’m okay, shh.” She hugged the girl to her, running her hand over her back in round, soothing movements. “You should have told me last night.” Her gaze locked with Blake’s, the accusation clear in her voice.
“I didn’t want to put you out. It was my problem.” His lips formed a tight, white line.
A deep hurt pierced her chest at his words. “I’m here to help look after the children. What you and I were talking about has no bearing on that, Blake.”
“Sorry, but I disagree. It has everything to do with it.” He looked at her again, the expression in his eyes inscrutable, before turning and leaving them alone.
She supposed she deserved his disdain after last night—ready to climb into bed with him one minute, bolting to her room and shutting him out the next. Not the nicest thing to do to anybody. It hurt more than Del would have thought, but it had given her time to think. Was she was ready to go down this path with this man?
Lilly lifted her tear-stained face to look at Delilah. “I got scared.” Her bottom lip wobbled as more tears flowed.
“That’s okay, honey. You were very brave yesterday though, and that’s what counts. Dreams can’t hurt you and I’m fine. Thank you for worrying about me.” She threw back the blankets and let go of Lilly. “How about you go and get dressed, and I’ll do the same. Then we can make breakfast. What do you think?”
Lilly wiped her hands over her eyes, and slid down off the bed. “I’m hungry.” She walked out, leaving her alone.
Delilah dressed and hurried out to the kitchen where Blake was setting the table. “Sorry, I must have slept in.” She hobbled to the fridge, taking out the milk and butter, and placing them on the table.
“It’s not late, stop worrying. I only just got up too.” He poured two cups of coffee, putting one down where she usually sat for meals.
“I’m sorry…about last night. I could have gone in and seen to her if I’d known. It was silly of you not to tell me what the nightmare was about. We could all have gotten to sleep a lot earlier than we did.”
He looked up at her. “I didn’t think you would want to help me soothe her.”
“Why not? Isn’t that why I’m here, Blake? Don’t let what happens between you and me get in the way of that. I would have helped with Lilly in a heartbeat. You make me feel as though I’m cold and calculating. I’m not like that at all.”
His eyes were inscrutable as he looked at her. With a sinking feeling in her stomach, she turned away. Last night had obviously hurt him more than she thought. “I’m sorry. I didn’t think. It’s just that you said you didn’t want children, and I thought it was all getting too much for you.” He stood and reached for her, making Del turn around and face him. “I got the impression you thought I was pressuring you.”
“Well, you got it wrong. What I said was my relationship broke up because I didn’t want children then.”
He shrugged and took her hands in his. “I can see you with a baby in your arms, Delilah. I think you’d make a great mother.” She read the sincerity in his eyes and trembled. Did he mean his baby? The thought warmed her, but scared her at the same time. It would all come if she let it, Del realized. It was the timing that was wrong.
She clenched her hand and punched him in the arm. “Idiot man.”
Embarrassed by the thoughts racing through her
