“The Hund will not speak until we are both present. That is his way.”
Jiminy Cricket! It appeared today was going to be full of impromptu meetings—first Cooper at Doc’s; then Jerry here, now Mr. Black up at Prudence’s. With a séance on my schedule for tonight, I could hardly wait to find out who and what came next.
“If you are not here within a quarter hour,” Prudence continued, “it will cost you a tooth.”
I winced at her threat, knowing she meant it and would take pleasure in the bloody process. Prudence was prone to violence first and foremost. It was probably due to her Executioner blood. I understood that tendency all too well. Violence was my middle name these days.
“I’ll be there as soon as I can.”
“Do not delay.”
“Didn’t I just say I’d be—”
The line went dead.
“Son of a peach pit!” I pocketed my cell phone and slipped inside a stall to take care of business now so that Prudence wouldn’t scare the piss out of me later.
After a quick pep rally in the bathroom mirror, I headed back out front. Jerry had returned and was pulling a credit card out of his wallet. I asked if the meeting was over, mumbling Cooper’s name and throwing out “a potential house in Lead” as an excuse to leave. Jerry gave me a thumbs-up while Mona nailed me with a suspicious squint and Ben wished me good luck. With a fake smile and a “Thanks for breakfast,” I was off, stuffing my arms in my coat as I raced out the door.
My cell phone rang as I crossed the parking lot.
Crikey! What in the hell did Prudence want now?
A glance at the screen made me breathe in relief. It wasn’t Prudence or Zelda this time.
“Hey, Harvey,” I answered.
“I need your help,” he shot back.
An idea floated my way. It was actually more like a lifesaving ring “I’ll be your huckleberry, but you have to do me a favor first.”
He hesitated. “Maybe I’m barkin’ up the wrong tree. How about we hang up and I call your aunt instead?”
“Too late.” I unlocked my Honda and slid inside. “You’re on the hook.”
“More like I’m snake-bit,” he grumbled.
“Where are you?” I started the engine.
“I’m where I’m always at when I’m not serenadin’ the pretty ladies at the senior center—your stallion’s place.”
“Good. Grab your coat and wait outside for me. I’ll be there in two shakes.”
“Wait! Where are we goin’?”
“I’ll explain when I pick you up.” Before he could buck any more, I hung up and shifted into gear.
A few minutes later, I pulled into Doc’s drive.
Harvey was waiting in the driveway with his favorite shotgun in hand. He opened my back door, sliding Bessie under the back seat, and then climbed in front next to me and closed the door. His stiff canvas coat rustled as he settled into the seat.
The smell of sweet baked chocolate had me sniffing his way. “Why do you smell like brownies?”
“I’d just finishing makin’ some when you called.”
“You called me.”
“Right, and I’m thinkin’ that was my first mistake.”
I backed out of the drive. “Why are you bringing your shotgun?”
“In case this so-called favor of yours ends up bringin’ about my second mistake.”
“You don’t need a gun for this.”
“I’ll be the judge of that. When it comes to you and favors, things get pretty dicey. Settin’ on a powder keg while smokin’ a cigarette is less risky.”
“Come on now.” I started down the street. “I’m not that bad.”
“Sure ya ain’t,” he said, nodding that I was. “So, where are we headin’ then?”
I hit the automatic door lock. “Lead.”
His gaze narrowed. “Where in Lead?”
I waited until we were back on the main road out of town. “A beautiful house.”
“Sassy-frassy! We’re headin’ up to see that goldurn, ring-tailed tooter, ain’t we?”
“Well, if by ‘tooter’ you mean Prudence, then yes.”
“Pull over.” He unlocked his door.
I hit the lock button. “No. Last night you said that the next time I go to Prudence’s place I should take you with me, remember?” There might have been a “probably” in there somewhere, but there was no use dwelling on the past. He was coming along.
“Maybe I changed my mind.”
“Too bad. I can’t handle going up there alone.”
He knew how skittish that house made me ever since I’d nearly been sacrificed by a whack job with a wish to use my womb to help spawn a pustule-covered demon named Kyrkozz. Prudence and her human ventriloquist acts had only made me want to cower in a corner even more.
Half of his face pinched in a cringe. “I don’t like the notion of bein’ that fireball’s puppet.”
“Neither do I, but I need you to help me deal with whatever monkey poo Prudence is going to fling today.”
He harrumphed.
“And in exchange, I’ll deliver on the favor you were calling about.”
I glanced out his window as we passed Bighorn Billy’s. Jerry’s Hummer and Mona’s SUV were still in the lot, but Ben’s Subaru was missing. I wondered what the two ex-love birds were chatting about inside.
“What was the favor you were going to ask from me, anyway?”
He crossed his arms. “I didn’t want a favor. I just wanted your help.”
“Same difference.”
“It ain’t.” He glared at me. “Besides, you swindled me into this favor of yours. I was openly asking for help, no trickery involved.”
We passed under the old trestle and started winding up the gulch toward Lead.
“I didn’t trick you. I just omitted one tiny detail.”
“Girl, do you think I just fell off the back of a turnip truck?”
I knew better than to reply to that. “So what did you want my help with?”
“Coop’s birthday is coming up next week.”
I snorted. “That makes total sense.”
“How’s that?”
“Cooper’s a Capricorn.”
“Yeah, so?”
“Capricorns are die-hard worker bees. They like to make their own rules, and they will give up everything to achieve a goal.” And by everything, I was thinking of Cooper’s rendezvous with Natalie behind the Purple Door Saloon years ago when he’d given up
