“We all feel like that. It’s the adrenaline. That’s the only way to survive a physical fight. If you don’t give yourself over to the moment, more likely than not you’re going to end up dead.”
Jamie was repeating the words Sam had said to him once. He could see so much of her father in her – Allyra had the same cool, logical mind and embodied the same strength of character.
Allyra was shaking her head, less than convinced. Jamie knew from long experience that she could be her own worst enemy, picking at a thread until the whole sweater came undone.
Jamie shook her firmly. “Stop it. You’re going to drive yourself crazy. We’re here. We survived. In fact, we won! Just hold onto that.”
Reaching out slowly, Jamie lifted her chin, forcing her eyes to meet his. Her expression was calm and serene, but her grey eyes were stormy and turbulent, a more accurate reflection of her thoughts. His first instinct was to comfort her – something he’d done so often before.
Acting on it, he leant forward, dipping his head down to kiss her. He drew her in, gathering her into his arms. She was soft and pliant – leaning slightly into him, so close now that he could smell the familiar scent of her, green apples and lime.
Their lips met and for a moment all was right in the world.
But before the kiss could deepen, she tensed up in his arms and drew back abruptly.
“I’m sorry.” She whispered, almost to herself. “I can’t – everything feels different – “
Seeing his stricken expression, she rushed to explain, her words tumbling out, fast and breathless. “I feel like I’ve been asleep for a really long time, and suddenly I’ve woken up and the world is a whole different place. Everything has changed and I can’t just pretend it hasn’t. I wish I could, but I’m not the same person anymore.”
She gasped and her voice hitched in her throat. “Our life before this meant everything to me, it still does. I’m just not the same person you fell in love with.”
Jamie couldn’t pretend that her words didn’t hurt, but he grabbed her hands fiercely. “Then tell me – explain to me how everything has changed. Help me understand.” He begged.
Allyra extracted her hands gently and rubbed her eyes tiredly. She met his eyes wearily. “I just need a bit more time – I’m trying to make sense of it myself. I’m sorry.”
He drew back, disappointed. Anger suddenly flared unreasonably within him. “I want to give you more time, I really do. But we’ve never kept anything from each other. What aren’t you telling me?”
“Never kept anything from each other? You’re joking right? What about all of this?” Allyra shot back.
They stared at each other, tension sparking like lightning between them.
Jamie drew away, shaking his head slowly. A crevice opened between them, filled with a thousand unspoken secrets.
Allyra reached out for him hesitantly, and as much as he wanted everything to go back to the way they were, the anger coursing through his veins wouldn’t allow him to go to her.
He got up and walked away, refusing to meet her eyes, afraid to see the pain in them.
Chapter 29 – Allyra
Allyra flinched at a scurrying noise in the darkness – she might very well be developing a phobia of the dark. It wasn’t so much the darkness itself, but the thought of what might be lurking in it; rats, snakes and other critters were the least of her worries. Somewhere in this thick, inky blackness were the nine other remaining Trials competitors and only one could be trusted not to try and kill her. At least she hoped Jamie could be trusted – she wasn’t so sure after a week of silence and avoidance.
She’d never felt more alone.
Despite the ever-widening distance between her and Jamie, distance she never thought could’ve existed, distance she regretted desperately, she still clung onto her secret – the secret of Alex. She wasn’t sure if it was plain naiveté, or blind hope, but she hung to the belief that Alex cared for her, that he wasn’t the power hungry Elemental High Master who’d led a generation of Elementals to their deaths.
Allyra was fighting for her survival, for her freedom. Yet, in the darkest corners of her mind, she acknowledged that she was still fighting to keep a promise to a man who hadn’t trusted her with his secrets. And in doing so, she’d risked everything, including the most important person she had left in her life.
The second Trial was the unknown one. She’d known from Alex’s lessons that the First Trial was different every year, but always based on teamwork. Check – she’d survived that particular piece of fun.
The third and final Trial was always one on one combat, until a single winner was left standing.
But on the second Trial, Alex could tell her nothing; he could remember none of it. Any person who’d survived the second Trial had their memories of it taken away. By power as old as the Five themselves.
The secrets of the second Trial had never been spilt.
There was no audience for the second Trial. No cheering, no excitement, just the eerie silence settling over her, as heavy as a thick winter coat. There would be nothing for the audience to see had there been one – the setting of this Trial were the tunnels underneath the Elemental College and without light, she’d done nothing but stumble around in the darkness, with no companions but those conjured up by her mind.
There had been few instructions. Marcus’ words had sounded more like warnings. He’d told them ominously that once they crossed the threshold into the second Trial, there would be no outside help, no one watching. The first two competitors
