I love you, Brad thought. And it felt right in his heart.
“I’m here,” Brad whispered in Ian’s ear, stroking his hair. “You have me.”
Ian sucked in a shuddering breath, tucking his face against Brad’s shoulder. “Thank you.”
Brad lost track of how long they stood in the hallway, Ian holding on to him, his body taut with stress. Brad kissed his cheek. Kissed his jaw, stroked his back.
“I should’ve done better,” Brad said. “Should’ve been here the first time. Hell, I should’ve been there when you gave birth to Gwen.”
Ian gulped.
“Were you alone then, too?” Brad murmured. “When you had her.”
Ian nodded, his fingers twisting into Brad’s shirt. Brad breathed out his guilt. “I promise I’ll be here every single time from now on.”
“Are you sure?” Ian asked, his voice muffled. “It’s not easy, Brad. It’s terrifying.”
“All the more reason why I should be with you,” Brad said. “So you aren’t alone.”
Ian shook against him, his body thin, the tension in his frame so high it felt as though he might snap.
Brad kissed his neck. Pressed slow kisses up his throat to his jaw, cradling his omega. “Mine,” he whispered. “I wish I could help. Wish there was more I could do.”
So he didn’t have to think about the surgery and Dr. Fenway cutting Gwen open, Gwen’s life vulnerable in the doctor’s hands.
“There’s no going back,” Ian said. “I can’t believe you told Gwen who you are.”
“I told you, I’m here for the long haul,” Brad whispered. “With you.”
Ian gave a disbelieving laugh, but he leaned into Brad, fragile. So Brad held him close, dragging his wrists down Ian’s arms, his back, marking Ian as his again. At least, this was something he was in control of.
“I’m fucking terrified, Ian,” he whispered.
“Of the surgery?”
“Yeah.”
“It’ll be okay,” Ian mumbled. “It’s always gone all right so far.”
“Doesn’t mean this time it will,” Brad said.
Ian hissed. “Don’t say that!”
But Brad couldn’t help thinking about it, his stomach twisting. “She’s so young,” he said. “I just… It’s so damn horrific having her in there.”
Ian breathed out against him. “So you love her, then.”
“Yeah.”
Didn’t even have to think about it. Gwen was his daughter, and Brad probably loved her as much as he loved Ian.
He hadn’t meant to forge these connections, but he didn’t know what he’d do without them now.
Ian chuckled, tired and sad. “I didn’t want to subject you to this, you know. It’s difficult. No one else should need to hang in this balance, never knowing what will happen. You don’t need the stress.”
“But you’re doing it no matter what. I’m just joining you so you aren’t alone.”
Ian swallowed, looking away. “There’s so much more you could be doing. Other people you could be dating.”
“Yeah, I know. I’m still here.” Brad slipped his hand between them, pressing his palm to Ian’s belly. “And this is my baby, too. I’m not leaving any of you.”
Ian cracked a smile, looking away. “I can’t believe I’m this fortunate. Sometimes I just… imagine what it’d be like if Gwen was born completely normal. If I could just change her defect, if I did better during the pregnancy. If I was healthier, or… if I was a better person, if I did better things…”
Brad pressed his lips against Ian’s temple. “It’s not your fault.”
Ian sighed. “You don’t know that. I should’ve stopped her earlier. I shouldn’t have let her get out of the truck. I should’ve just taken the day off work, and—oh, shit.”
Ian’s eyes grew wide. He fumbled in his pockets for his phone, breathing hard.
On his phone, there were eight missed calls, and twenty-four messages. Brad led Ian to the gray plastic chairs against the wall, made him sit.
Ian whined, turning his phone face-down on his lap. “I missed a whole lecture.”
“It’s fine,” Brad said. “It’s not gonna change your life.”
Ian hugged himself. “Harold’s going to find out, I’m sure. I’ve spent the last of my vacation days on Gwen’s hospital visits, Brad. Your dad’s going to fire me if the word gets out.”
Ian sucked in shallow, shaky breaths, and it made Brad’s chest tighten, seeing him panic like this.
So he took the phone from Ian. “I’ll call June. I’ll handle it.”
Ian covered his face. “You weren’t supposed to get involved. If your dad hears…”
“You’re mine,” Brad said, sitting next to Ian. He pulled his omega against himself, pressed a kiss to Ian’s lips. “I’ll fix this.”
“I’m older than you. I’m supposed to have my life together by now.”
“We’ll fix that later.” Brad squeezed his shoulder, unlocking Ian’s phone—he’d been with Ian long enough that he’d found out Ian’s codes. “Lemme handle this first.”
He glanced at the missed calls—two from the department office, and six from June. The messages were all from June, so Brad hit the latest one.
Brad here, he typed. Gwen’s in surgery right now. There was an emergency. Ian’s fine.
Ian turned away and pulled his knees up to his chest. Pressed his face against the wall. “He’s going to fire me, Brad. I don’t know how to deal with the bills if that happens. We’ll get kicked out of the apartment. I’ll probably go bankrupt.” Ian sucked in a sharp breath, covering his face. “That might be a better option.”
Brad linked their fingers together. The moment the phone screen lit up with an incoming call, Brad answered it. “June?”
June hesitated. “Brad?”
“Ian’s not gonna be fired, is he?”
Ian ducked his head, shoving his hands up his sleeves so he could pick at his scars. Brad caught his hand, held him steady.
“I covered for him,” June said, her voice worried. “There was a delay, though. The office heard about it. I believe they’ve been trying to contact Ian.”
“There was an emergency when we took Gwen out,” Brad said. “I’ll get receipts and everything. Is that gonna
