“Do you drop spoons with your dad too, or only me?” he asked.
“Dada,” Jenn answered, looking expectantly at him.
What would it feel like to be Jenn’s dad? Eric had offered him the option a couple times, and Ollie had thought about it.
It seemed like such a huge responsibility, caring for Jenn. Even more than his own child, because Jenn was still Alice’s, and Eric had loved his wife. Maybe it was better for Olivier not to think of Jenn as his own. Alice would be mad at him if he did, wouldn’t she?
His heart pattering, Olivier replaced the spoon on Jenn’s tray. Jenn threw it off again.
“Ugh!” Olivier made a face. Jenn laughed.
By the time she dropped her spoon for the tenth time, Ollie had given up. He sat on the floor, waiting until she dropped the spoon again. Then he reached up and set it back on her tray, and Eric stepped into the kitchen.
Eric paused. “What’re you doing on the floor?”
“I’m tired,” Ollie said. “She’s making me exercise.”
Eric laughed. “How?”
“By doing squats.”
As though it was an invitation to demonstrate, Jenn dropped her spoon again.
Olivier groaned. Eric grinned, crossing the kitchen to Ollie’s side. Then he crouched and tipped Olivier’s head back, pressing a soft, damp kiss to his lips. Eric smelled like cedar, and the spring breeze.
“Mm.” Olivier’s eyelids fluttered shut.
Eric kissed him again. “You’re doing great,” Eric murmured. “I brought you salmon. Best I could find. Pigeon’s didn’t have it—I had to go to an Asian market where they had a sushi stand.”
Olivier’s heart skipped. “Thank you.”
“You’re really going to eat it raw?” Eric looked askance at him.
Ollie nodded. “Yeah. I hated it the one time I tried it... but I need to have some now.”
His stomach growled. Eric shook his head, handing the bag over.
The fish was expensive, at twenty-four dollars a pound. Olivier winced at the price tag, then ripped into the foam tray, rinsing the block of pink-orange meat at the sink. He patted it dry and sliced it thin. Dipped a chunk into a ramekin of soy sauce, and popped it into his mouth.
Eric shuddered with disgust.
The fish was cool, firm, almost crunchy with how fresh it was. Ollie savored the sweetness of its flesh, and the salty tang of the soy sauce.
The entire block of fish was gone before he knew it. Eric was still watching, enthralled and revolted.
“It’s just fish,” Ollie said.
“But it’s raw.” Eric made a face. “And you used to hate it.”
“It’s better than I expected.” Olivier licked his lips. “Do you want a kiss? For making the trip to get this.”
Eric hesitated for a long moment. “Think I’ll pass. Maybe if you rinse your mouth.”
Ollie laughed. Eric leaped at him, catching him in a tackle-hug.
“I’m not kissing you,” Eric said. But he dragged his nose up Ollie’s cheek, just sniffing at him. “Well, just your mouth. I can kiss everywhere else.”
That made Olivier smile. Eric kissed down his neck, and Jenn babbled, reaching out for her dad.
Ollie looked at Jenn’s red hair, her green eyes. Blurted, “Were you ever like this with Alice?”
He shouldn’t have asked it. He knew he shouldn’t. The moment the question left his lips, Eric froze.
But Olivier wanted to know. Whether Eric had been this intimate with another omega, whether there was a chance he could do the same with someone else. His heart thumped. “S-sorry.”
Eric shook his head. “Kinda. It isn’t the same, though.”
But he’d held someone else in his arms, he’d kissed Alice. Hell, Eric had slept with Alice, hadn’t he? And Olivier had no right to judge Eric for it, because he’d done worse.
All the same, Olivier couldn’t help feeling envious. He blew out a sigh, trying not to feel that way. “Sorry. I shouldn’t have asked.”
Eric rolled his shoulders. “It’s fine. You have a right to know.”
Jenn began to cough. Olivier tensed. Eric turned, worry flickering through his eyes. He stopped by Jenn’s side, thumping lightly on her back. Jenn’s face turned red, and she wheezed.
“She’s choking,” Eric said sharply.
Ice slid down Ollie’s spine. What do I do?
He hadn’t the least idea how he could help. What if they couldn’t dislodge the food?
Eric picked her up, turning her onto her front. He balanced her on his forearm, then thumped hard on her back. A piece of egg flew out of her mouth, bouncing off the floor.
Jenn wheezed. Olivier stared at the egg.
She’d been choking on that. He should’ve cut it into smaller pieces, shouldn’t he? Jenn didn’t have enough teeth to chew her food properly.
Ollie’s stomach twisted. He should’ve been watching her. He shouldn’t have distracted Eric. What if Eric hadn’t been here, and Jenn choked to death?
Horrified, Olivier stepped back. Jenn wailed. Eric bobbed her in his arms, murmuring. He looked shaken.
I shouldn’t have thought I could care for her. Olivier pressed himself against the sink, his heart beating too fast. Shouldn’t have thought I could be her dad.
When Eric met his eyes again, Ollie stopped breathing. He couldn’t help being afraid. Eric would say, You fucked up. I shouldn’t have asked you to be my omega.
Instead, Eric asked, “You okay? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”
Olivier shrugged, his joints stiff. “I messed up.”
Eric frowned. “I did. Should’ve been watching her.”
“I should have.”
“We’re both at fault, then,” Eric said.
Olivier gulped. How many times could he mess up before Eric decided he’d had enough? Olivier had left too soon to find out that very first time, back when they were teenagers.
Eric rubbed Jenn’s back until she calmed down. Then he crossed the kitchen, sliding his arm around Ollie’s waist. Olivier’s belly bumped against his hip; it was an awkward hug.
“What’re you worried about?” Eric murmured, stroking his back.
Olivier shrugged.
“Tell me, Ollie.” Eric kissed his forehead, his lips a whisper against Ollie’s skin. “Is it Jenn?”
Olivier hesitated. “Yeah.”
“I should’ve been watching her. She’s my responsibility, you know.”
“You trusted me to watch her. So... it was my fault.”
“Still mine, too.”
“She could’ve
