“Where to?” I asked with a grin.
“One of my favorite restaurants in the area,” Hamilton replied vaguely. “I thought since you’re practically living with me and fucking my brains out every night, the polite thing to do would be to take you on an actual date.”
I gulped. “I’m not living with you,” I teased nervously.
“Does it sound like I’m complaining?” Hamilton countered. “Between your mother, my family, and Saint wanting to hassle you, I’m more than happy to have you under my roof…and in my bed…and under me.” Hamilton’s voice trailed off as he leaned over the center console to kiss me deeply. I smiled against his mouth. A car honked. He grabbed my breast and kneaded it over my knit sweater.
“Fuck, you’re addictive,” he rasped while pulling away, his lips shining from the gloss on my lips.
I was in a daze, my eyes lidded from lust as I sat back in my seat and pressed my thighs together. “What does one wear to your favorite restaurants in the area?”
“Something short and sexy. Also, panties aren’t allowed. I want to be able to reach up your skirt and feel your needy cunt at all times.”
Fuck. Hamilton was so good at dirty talk. It was ridiculous how easily his words had my pussy weeping for him. I wiggled in my seat, making a satisfactory smile break out on his face. “No panties, hmm?” I asked as we drove down the road toward his townhouse. The leaves on the trees lining the street were turning a golden hue.
“None. I’ll even wear a suit, if you’d like. Maybe after, we can go to this bar I like? Stay up all night and watch the sun rise.” I dipped my brow. “Actually, we have all day. We should call Jess. Go do something crazy. What if we drove to California? Yeah. We could do that.”
“Whoa. You’re planning a lot. We can’t just go on a random road trip,” I said with a giggle while shifting in my seat to get a better look at Hamilton. Now that I wasn’t riddled with lust, I noticed a slight tic in his jaw. His strong hands were gripping the steering wheel, and his spine was so rigid that it looked uncomfortable. “Are you okay?”
“Of course I’m okay. I’m better than okay. Do you want to go get ice cream? I really want some ice cream. And maybe some sex. Can I eat you out when we get home?”
Hamilton seemed manic and like he was avoiding something. “Did something happen this morning, Hamilton?” I asked. I was only gone an hour, but he was very fidgety.
He turned onto his street and let out a sigh. “No. Nothing happened.”
“Then why are you acting so…”
“I don’t want to sit still today,” Hamilton murmured softly while parking. Once the car was off, he pressed his forehead to the steering wheel and breathed in deeply.
“Why not?” I asked before reaching out to massage his neck.
“Because when I sit still, I think. And when I think, I see her face.”
“Who?”
Hamilton sat up and stared at his hands for a long moment. “It’s the anniversary of my mother’s death. I just need to do something or—”
I quickly unbuckled and reached across to hold him. Hamilton trembled a bit, and I felt his pain like it was my own. Hamilton was usually so cocky, mischievous, and playful. He walked around like he owned the world. Nothing could tear him down.
But not right now. Right now, he was like a shattered piece of glass, the shards cutting at my skin with painful clarity. I hated this for him.
“I saw her that day. I was the one that found her, you know,” he whispered. “I just don’t want to see her, Vera.”
“I know,” I replied while stroking his back. But honestly, I didn’t know. I didn’t know what the right thing to say in this moment was. I was at a loss. Hamilton needed help right now, but I didn’t know how to give it to him.
A knock on the window made me pull away, and Jess stood there with a forced grin. She was decked out in black armor, with goggles pushed up on top of her head. Strapped to her thigh was a paintball gun. Hamilton wiped his eyes and rolled the window down. “Hey there, asshole. We’re going paintballing. I also found a monster of a hike to go on. Then rock climbing. Racquetball at the gym. I’ve got every minute planned for the next twenty-four hours, so you better suit up so I can kick your ass.” Jess turned to look at me and winked. “I know we usually go to the strip club and get baked on the day we shall not name, but I’m thinking Vera can’t handle that. Infinity will stab me in the clit if I go.”
Hamilton let out an exhale, and the tension seemed to escape his shoulders. “Fuck yeah,” Hamilton exclaimed. “That sounds like an epic day. I did promise Vera I’d take her to dinner though.”
Jess arched a brow. “Oh? Where to?”
Hamilton swallowed and looked out the windshield, avoiding both of our gazes. “Romero’s Italian Restaurant.”
Jess went quiet. “Your mom’s favorite place,” she murmured. “You sure? You want me to go too?”
Hamilton reached out to grab my hand. “Nah. I think this will be really good.”
An awkward silence settled over the three of us for a few seconds, but Hamilton ended it with a clap of his hands. “I better go get my gear then, huh? Winner has to buy drinks later.” Jess whooped. I felt like I had whiplash. How could Hamilton go from falling apart to talking about paintball so quickly? We got out of the car, and Hamilton ran up to the front door. “Be right back.”
I stood on the
