I walked back to the living room and looked through the windows at the back of the house toward the mountains. Heavy clouds still clung to the peaks, and this time it looked like it was going to rain in earnest.
Movement caught my attention out of the corner of my eye. Declan was on the deck, pacing back and forth. He pulled out his phone, peered at the screen, then typed something before returning his phone to his pocket. At some point, he’d donned a simple set of jeans and a T-shirt, but his feet were bare.
It was his face, however, that caught my attention the most. He looked…vulnerable. Concerned. And everything in me just wanted to comfort him, even if I had questions.
I wanted to give him a little bit of what he’d given me the last several days.
I bit my lip and debated. I didn’t want to bother him, but it had been nearly an hour since he’d stepped away.
I opened the door slowly and stepped outside. The slight chill in the air made me snuggle deeper into his robe. I padded across the deck in his thick socks. Declan turned and saw me, and he froze.
His expression went from vulnerable, to surprised, to completely blank. I came out here to comfort him or to let him know I’d listen, whatever he needed. But now, it just looked like he wanted his space.
“I’m sorry,” I told him. “I just thought…never mind, I’ll leave you alone.”
I turned back to the house, but then felt a flutter of air behind me. Suddenly Declan’s arms were around me.
“You don’t have to go,” he murmured in my ear.
“You look like you still need some space.”
“Not from you.”
I tried to turn his grasp, to see his face, but his whole body tightened. He kept one arm around my waist and the other dipped into the slightly parted robe to press against my belly, holding me against him. Even through the thickness of the robe and his jeans, I could feel how hard he was and I could feel the heat radiating from everywhere else.
It was tempting to give in, knowing that intimacy would take away some of the distance between us, but I couldn’t. Not right now.
“I should probably call my dad,” I said softly. “Or maybe go back and spend some more time with him.”
“I thought we were going to go tomorrow,” he said, voice gruff.
But you don’t seem to want me here anymore, I almost said.
“Talk to me, Royal,” Declan murmured.
“You’re not talking to me,” I ground out, my voice betraying hurt that I’d tried to keep tucked away. “I thought we were being honest with each other.”
He’d told me the truth about his abilities and I’d told him the truth about my past and how insecure that relationship had made me feel. And we were both still here, still invested.
“We are,” he said, though his voice sounded strained.
I shook my head. “It doesn’t feel like it.”
I tugged against his arms until he finally loosened his hold and let me turn around to see his face. At that moment, he didn’t look like he was keeping anything from me. He just looked tortured, pained, like he knew exactly what he needed or what he wanted to say, but he just couldn’t get it out.
“Then what do you need?” I asked him.
“You.”
My breath caught at the heat I saw in his gaze. Then his hand slid inside the robe and down to my ass. He squeezed. A breeze blew past, but I could barely feel it when his arms were around me.
“Declan,” I sighed.
He either heard or saw my hesitation because he took my hand and lead me to a lounge chair at the side of the deck. It was up against the house, which blocked some of the wind.
It still had a great view, the mountains rising in the distance as fog and clouds hovered around the peaks.
Summer was taking its time getting here.
Declan sat and pulled me onto his lap so I was straddling him. Face to face, there seemed to be little I could keep from him. Not with his eyes on me in scrutiny.
“I need you to talk to me,” I told him, my voice so quiet it was almost swept away in the breeze.
“I’m trying.”
“What is it?” I asked. “What’s going on that—”
“Royal,” he warned, voice low.
“What? Is that so wrong of me to want to know what you’re keeping from me or—”
“It’s not—fuck,” he hissed, eyes shutting briefly. “You’re worrying about something that isn’t a big deal. It—”
“Not a big deal? The truth isn’t a big deal?” I gave a humorless laugh. “Of course. Make it seem like I’m being irrational here.”
“That’s not what I said at all,” he grumbled.
I shook my head, anger threatening to boil over. “Now, I’m the one who needs some space.”
I shifted on his lap and started to set my hands on his shoulders to stand but Declan grabbed both my wrists in a solid grip. “Royal, please.”
“Dammit, Declan—” I yanked my arms but he only held me tighter. “You’re being an ass.”
“Just take a breath so we can talk—”
“A breath?” I burst out. “Fuck that. I’m leaving.”
“Royal,” he growled.
When I struggled harder, he stood and turned around. Suddenly, I was laying on the lounge chair and his body was pinned on mine, my wrists still in one of his hands while the other tipped my chin up.
My breath came out in a gasp to find myself under him in the blink of an eye. I stopped struggling immediately, knowing there was no way I could beat him.
