Atlas trudges to us, and I exhale, hands dropping to my side as I whisper, “You okay?”
He opens the door for me. “I’ll have some pie, Ceels,” he answers loudly enough for Luke to hear. The three of us start to go in, but Luke calls to Sean that he wants to talk to him.
We leave him out there, walk inside and head for the pie though neither of us really wants any. As soon as normal conversations restart in the TV room, Atlas quietly grumbles to me, “What’s that about? Why does he want to talk to him?”
Sofia was listening, and she snaps, “We were the ones who found Sean, remember?” The club goes silent as she growls, “Luke wants to see how he’s doing here. That okay with you, Atlas? Not everything revolves around you, you selfish...” Her lips tightly lock against the cuss word, not allowing it to fall from her sharp tongue. We Ciphers don’t call each other names when we really mean them. Teasing, yes. In anger, no. Words can cut if you’re not careful. And it’s a wound that can take years to heal, if it ever does. This house may be huge but it’s too small for that bullshit.
With everyone looking at him, Atlas storms out, ashamed, embarrassed. Helpless.
We hear Meg and Honey Badger returning from the grand parlor where they’d eaten their meal with Jett and Luna. Out of view, they ask Atlas where he’s going.
He mutters, “To bed.”
Sage rolls her eyes, which disgusts me.
Upset, I look for support, scanning the faces of everyone present—Fuse, Melodi, Scythe, Denita, my dad, mom and my brother. “We’re a family! We stick together! And we forgive.”
Meg and the Badger pause at my words as they walk in. Their eyes flicker with comprehension that something happened in here with Atlas. They turn around to go help their son.
But Sage’s voice rings out, “No! It’s gotta be me.”
Surprised they watch her disappear and Meg locks eyes with me to whisper an emotional, “Thank you!”
Clearing her throat, Melodi offers, “I’ll make him some hot cocoa with marshmallows.”
My brother rises from the couch. “I’ll bring it up to him. I’m the least involved.” At my look he shrugs, “It’s not a big deal, Ceels. Don’t worry about me.”
“I would if you’d stop pointing out that you’re on the outside.”
“I don’t point it out. I’m just stating a fact. If I go up there, Atlas won’t bite my head off because I’m not really a part of any of the drama here. I’m like Switzerland.”
Sighing I lean against the granite counter and take little comfort in that cocoa delivery.
CHAPTER 23
SEAN
A s I tug on my sneakers to head into the house after training a couple days later, Celia asks me, “Can you hold up a second?” Hesitating, I walk back onto the padded ground, barefoot and sweaty like her.
“Sure, what’s up?”
“Is everything okay between us?”
Bouncing my mitts against one leg I offer a noncommittal, “We’re fine.”
“You seem a little distant.”
“Just focused. Lot to learn.”
And your heart is somewhere else.
Plus, Luke said…
“Yeah,” she whispers, eyes traveling to her fingernails as she brings one up to bite it. Deciding against it, she crosses her arms. “You want to see a movie later? Maybe get the group of us to go?”
“I’m going to watch some videos on guns. See if I can’t get ahead of the game before we start that round of training tomorrow.”
Her smile grows as she releases her doubt. “Such a badass.”
Snatching her boots off the ground she heads inside with them lightly swinging. I stare after her.
Her instincts are right—I’ve been distant. But I can’t tell her why.
I’ve got all kinds of ideas of how to make that lonely look in her eyes go away. Gritting my teeth I stare off into the backyard and shake my head once, irritated.
In the kitchen I discover Sage teasing Atlas, a welcome sight since she and her brother have barely spoken since I got to Louisiana. They must have buried the hatchet because they’re both laughing as he grabs a protein shake from the fridge. His eyes flick to me. “You wanna shower first?”
“Yeah,” I smile, catching the shake he throws to me so he can keep talking to his sister.
In the hallway I run into Celia’s father. Tonk Sr. is lanky, a big guy, not as grey as Jett, but also blonde. Celia and Sofia Sol have that bi-racial thing in common, but both look less white, more Latin.
“Lemme talk to ya a second, Sean.”
“Sure, Tonk.”
He glances around to make sure we’re alone, “Listen, Jett told us about that guy you saved. The real story. Now don’t shut down! We need to know this shit if you’re going to become one of us.” I relax a little, because it’s true. No denying I need all their votes. With respect in his tone he surprises me by confiding, “When I was a kid, my dad was a real piece of work. That’s why he’s never met Celia or Junior. I uh, went through what you did.” He holds my look to infer he means the abuse. I nod and he inhales, staring at the wall like the memories are before him all over again. “I’ve had dreams about him, me telling him what a shit-hole he was, how much I hate him. If I came up on him now, I’d like to think I’d knock the fucker down.” Meeting my eyes he admits, “But I probably would have saved him, too. Lucky for me I’m old so he’s probably long gone. Must have sucked being you that day.” Clapping a hand on my shoulder he leans in. “I respect the hell out of what you did.” He moves on and I exhale the rest
