Tears jump to her beautiful eyes. “No, I’m not happy. Are you happy?!”
“No! I’m fuckin’ miserable. But that’s the way it’s gotta be. You’re ashamed of what I do! You want out! You felt stuck!” Throwing one arm into the breeze, I shout, “So there! I just unstuck you!”
She takes a step closer, looking at me like I spoke another language, voice stunned. “I’m not ashamed of what you do.”
In pain I laugh, “Yeah, you fuckin’ are.”
“I am not!”
“I heard you!”
“You heard me when?! When have I ever implied such a horrible thing?”
Glancing back I chew on my cheek while scanning what looks like twenty or thirty people. Even Ralphie. Of course her girls, too. Samantha has the same expression Cherry’s got, and Zoe’s just staring at me like she wants to wake from the nightmare.
Fuck.
No turning back from this.
They’ve seen it all.
Will this embarrass her?
Maybe.
She’s the one who judged me.
I can tell she’s aware we’re on display now but, like me, she won’t hide from it.
“I saw your face when I told you I was a mechanic after that first night. You got quiet. I could tell you were disappointed. And then on Saturday I heard you lie to Paige when she asked where I worked. I told you, no lies. And that one was the worst — it fuckin’ killed me — because I’d been waitin’ for it all along! And yeah, sure, I hoped I was wrong, or that the time we spent together might have made you not give a shit that I wasn’t some famous guy or whatever it is you think you deserve! But there it was.” I hold out my hands. “Just when you thought I couldn’t hear you, that lie slipped out and gave you away.”
She blinks at me. “Wait, so you disappeared because of that?”
“I needed a fuckin’ minute, Cherry!”
“And then…what?”
“And then what, what?”
“And then you were going to call and break up with me?”
Spinning around, exasperated, “No!” I grab my head and shout, “I was going to call so you could break up with me! I wasn’t ready to hear it. I needed a fuckin’ minute to prepare myself for losing you!”
She takes a step back, gentle now, like she might scare off a wild animal she wants to get closer to. It’s confusing me, the ways she’s searching my eyes. “Why did you think I was going to break up with you, after I brought you to meet my whole family?”
My volume lowers because this isn’t easy to admit. “After the months we’ve been spending more and more time together, practically every day, you tell Paige you felt stuck. I heard you saying that you didn’t know what to do! That even though you were happy you knew it couldn’t last, or something like that! And you said these things right after lying about knowing where I work. It was a one-two knockout punch to my gut, Cherry. We can’t go back from there.”
“You know what your problem is?”
My jaw barely moves. “I can’t wait to find out.”
“You think you know everything!” She walks up, her sweet scent lifted by the breeze as gentle fingers caress my cheek, confusing the hell out of me. “Gage, I wasn’t talking about you to Paige. We were talking about my future. About how she thinks I should be doing something that plays more to my strengths!” I frown, and she tilts her head, checking to see if I’m following. “Can’t you see how you misunderstood? You didn’t know the context of that conversation! It wasn’t about you at all, but a continuation of something she’d brought up before! And I am not the slightest bit ashamed of you being a mechanic! Paige asked where you worked. I said I didn’t know. Because I don’t! I’ve never been there! We have the same schedules and you never took me! And as for my reaction when you told me why you wear those sexy shirts with your name sewn into them, I had to search — just now when you were losing it — back in time to know what the hell you were talking about! And you know what?!! You totally misunderstood.”
“No, I didn’t.”
“Yeah ya did!”
“No, I freakin’ didn’t!”
She cocks an eyebrow. “Oh, it’s freakin’ now? Did you tone down your cussing because you’re confused and maybe…” she holds her thumb and finger together. “…a li’l less angry? Just a little bit?”
“When you asked what I did, and I told you, there was silence! All the way to my truck and everything. You’re used to—”
She cuts me off with a yelled, “Who’s judging now?!! Huh?!” lowering her voice now that she’s got my attention. “I was stunned because your house is almost better than my parents’ and I was wondering if mechanics really do rip us off like we always think they do!”
A ripple of laughter through the crowd.
I raise my voice for them. “I’m as honest as they come!” and to her add the question, “That’s really what you were thinking?”
“Sammy, what does Uncle Jake do for a living?”
“He’s a construction worker!”
“Water reclamation specifically. And what about Uncle Jett?”
“We can’t say!”
Cherry meets my eyes, clarifying, “But it’s not a job that rolls him in cash every night. My cousin Ben is a farmer. His father, my Uncle Jaxson, has a modest ranch with a little retreat called Sunflower that barely clears a profit. Wyatt’s a cop, as you know, and they make very little. Nathan is a firefighter—”
“Okay! You don’t have to go down the list.”
“I’m just saying, the only person who thought I looked down on your job was you. I run books for a yoga studio and barely make above minimum wage! I’ve got two roommates!”
Sam shouts, “Two awesome roommates!”
“But two roommates, so when you told me you were a mechanic after we fucked all over your two story, three bedroom craftsman,” more laughter from the crowd, ignored this time, “I was impressed almost
