“Uh, what are you doing?”
He’s not out there when I look again. I stand fully in the window then, searching both directions.
“I must have imagined it. I thought I saw someone I used to know.”
“Someone you like?” She frowns. “Because you look terrified right now.”
I run my hand down my neck and take a deep breath. “Someone I hoped I’d never see again.”
“Tell me everything.” She leans in as I sit back down.
“I…I’m not ready to talk about it yet. It’s…he’s someone who brought out the worst in me and my family. He’s the reason my mom and I moved across the country—well, one of them. He ruined my family.” I press my lips together and a shudder crosses my spine.
Luci reaches out and takes my hand. “It’s okay. Maybe you imagined it was him. Do you see him now?”
I shake my head. I’m not imagining anything. Luke is here. And it’s only a matter of time before he comes to get whatever he’s after.
I don’t tell my mom about seeing him. I make sure the doors are locked every night and I look obsessively on pound websites for a dog that could protect me.
Chapter Fourteen
All it took was my permission for my mom to start seeing Stefen again. She’s floating around the house again and swears that my trouble with Raf is over. I’m starting to believe her. Since the day on the beach, he won’t even look at me.
I miss his eyes on me.
He will never know it.
I thought his hatred was the worst thing, but it turns out that his indifference is far worse.
Heidi walks by while I’m closing my locker and she cocks an eyebrow, far too smug for my liking.
“Looking lonelier every day,” she pouts. “Turns out your porn star mother didn’t teach you all her tricks on how to satisfy a man.” She runs her tongue around her candy red lips and simulates a hand job.
My mind runs away with me at the thought of Raf turning to her since he’s leaving me alone. It’s what she wants me to think. Every chance she gets, she’s saying things like this, trying to poke the bear.
I walk past her like I haven’t heard her and it’s not enough of a diss, but I know she hates thinking she’s not affecting me.
Luci falls into step next to me. “You going to the game this week?”
“Yes. Wanna go—?”
“Stay away from the game,” Raf says as he passes us. “Off-limits. Don’t push me on this.”
He keeps walking while Luci and I stare after him. I’m shocked he spoke to me.
“What is his problem?”
I shake my head. “So many things, but I’m not letting him keep me from the game. I promised Ashton I’d come…Raf can eat it.”
She laughs and I do too, but dread and anticipation wrestle inside at the thought of defying him.
I’ll be ready for him this time.
I don’t bother with school colors. I have no school spirit for Longlake. But I do paint Ashton’s number—56—on my cheek. I have a tight sweater and my favorite jeans on and when Luci shows up, she’s decked out in navy and green, school spirit from head to toe. She wrinkles her nose when she sees my outfit, but I turn my cheek to the side and point out the number painted on my face.
“Okay, that’s more like it. You could’ve at least worn one of the school colors.”
“Longlake doesn’t deserve my allegiance.”
She shrugs. “Fair enough.”
“You ready?”
Mom knocks on my door and when I open it, Luci gasps. I turn toward her, surprised to see the awe on her face when she sees my mom. She flushes and holds out her hand, and my mom shakes it, laughing.
“Well, hello. I’m Sarah, and you must be Luci.”
“Such a huge fan,” Luci says.
“God, Luci! You never told me that.”
She grins and ignores me. “The way you broke society’s perception of pornography…made it more of an art form. Huge, huge fan,” she repeats.
I roll my eyes as my mom titters with the attention.
“I’m not sure how I feel about a high school student being so familiar with my work, but it’s nice to hear.” Mom’s cheeks are pink and she presses her lips together, giving me wide eyes.
“On that note, we’re gonna go. This is weird.” I grab a jacket and my phone, tucking my license and cash in a wristlet.
We get to the car and I turn to Luci. She holds up her hands. “Sorry. I couldn’t help myself.”
“How did I not know you were such an avid fan of my mother’s?”
She bites her bottom lip and cringes as we get in the car and buckle up. “Did I come on too strong? I guess I thought it was something you might not want to know, but yeah…” She lets out a breathy exhale and I shake my head staring at her and holding up my hand.
“No, do not go all breathy when we’re talking about my mother.”
“If she wasn’t your mother, you’d be in awe. Just sayin’.”
“I don’t want to know this,” I yell.
She starts laughing and eventually I join in. By the time I pull into the school parking lot, we’re in hysterics. I wipe my eyes and can’t even look at her without laughing. I open the door and the blast of cool air reminds me to grab my jacket. I reach in the backseat to grab it and when I turn back around to step out, Raf is standing there, blocking me.
“Why do you insist on being so difficult?”
“You don’t get a say in what I do.” As tricky as it is to get out of the car with him so close, I manage. My chest hits his and both of us take a quick intake of breath. It makes me feel a slight bolt of power and I stand taller. “Step away.”
He holds his hand out as if leading the way. “Remember I warned you. Go home. Nobody wants you
