No matter what Kit did, the ghost of Kirby would not leave her mind. The wounds were wide open again and she was desperate to find resolution and healing. It was time to take action and she knew exactly what to do.
Her eyes darted around the room, searching her immediate surroundings, feeling immense frustration knowing the scheduling book that contained her contacts was downstairs in her office—the last room in the house she ever wanted to go into again. She would find another way.
She got up, threw on her slippers and slowly padded downstairs. Steering clear of the office altogether, she headed into the entertainment room, where she was pleased to find Alexa.
“Hey!”
Alexa glanced over, surprised. “I thought you were still napping. How are you feeling?”
She shook her head. “I was out cold for a few hours. Feels strange to be napping so much, but I assume my body needs it to make a full recovery—at least that’s what Dr. Perry told me. I’m improving, still a little shaky. It’s more a mental thing than a physical thing now. My mind keeps going… Oh Lex, there’s so much. It’s so quiet in here. I’m assuming Sully, the band and the team are gone?”
Alexa nodded. “Yep. They left about an hour ago. Sully went in and told you goodbye and gave you a kiss. He told me you looked really peaceful and he didn’t want to wake you. He also told me to look out for you.”
She met her eyes. “And I will be doing that because I know how you are. Anyway, they’re wheels up out of Van Nuys. They’re in the air right now on their way to Miami.” Alexa surveyed her. “Is all the stuff plaguing your mind right now related to our conversation about Kirby a while back?”
Kit nodded slowly. “Yes and Sully and I had a big argument. Not to mention Sean providing me with some disturbing information. Trying to get my footing still.”
She gently rubbed her chest, as if protecting herself from an increasing sense of vulnerability, feeling a tenderness she assumed was not only from her surgery but related to the memory of her heated and heartbreaking conversation with Sully—one she wished she could forget. Not so. The conversation with Sean afterward did nothing but send massive shockwaves and solidify her initial motivation to separate.
She sighed. “It was a game changer.”
Alexa nodded, intuitively figuring it out. “The groupie?”
Kit met her eyes, feeling emotionally numb and still stunned from the information she received from Sean as she nodded her head slowly in confirmation. “Yes. More than one night. He’s having an affair. She stayed on tour with him for a few weeks or maybe a few months—who knows. It’s been going on a while. And I heard about it from someone else. He couldn’t even tell me. I can’t believe he lied right to my face and told me he hadn’t had sex with anyone. And he was convincing. That’s the thing—I can always spot when he’s lying and I couldn’t this time. That really disturbs me. There’s more.”
Alexa eyes widened and then narrowed as she shook her head in disgust. “Wait, what? There’s more? Holy fucking crap! That bastard. What? Tell me.”
She hung her head for a moment. It was all too much to take in and she was struggling with it. She looked up. “He’s got a full blown cocaine problem. I have no idea what he’s been up to lately because he’s been so high. He’s totally spun out. The last time I went out there to see him on the road, I could tell that he would dip in here and there, but it seemed under control.”
She sighed. “Even on tour breaks, he was managing, but now it’s different. He’s gone past the point of no return. He can’t go without it, Lex. He was acting like a fucking junkie.”
Her voice was barely audible as she continued. “I’m worried that he’s gonna branch into something stronger. No doubt, he’s reaching his threshold. He’s probably blowing through a thousand dollars a day or maybe even more at this point.”
Her eyes welled up with tears. “He will die if he continues this way of life after the tour.”
Alexa let out a long, defeated sigh and buried her face in her hands for a moment. She finally looked up and met Kit’s eyes. “Shit. It’s like he’s cheating on you twice. I feel like I’m seeing a repeat of a bad episode of Sully TV. It’s like 1987 antics all over again. The problem being he’s six years older now.”
She nodded slowly. “Yes. And I can’t do it anymore, Lex. I feel like I’m losing it. My head is so scrambled from the shooting and then the whole Kirby thing, which I still can’t figure out, and now Sull. My marriage is over. My career as their manager is over. Both dead as a doornail.”
She folded her arms across her chest. “Maybe if I would have been there for Sully like I had been on other tours, like I had been early on in our marriage, it would be different. I wouldn’t be sitting here in this position with him on tour high as a kite and fucking someone else while I pine for the ghost of an ex-fiancé. I’m at fault here too. I kept dismissing Sull, Lex.”
She couldn’t mask the regret and disappointment that encompassed her. “Truth is communication broke down a while ago and I was in denial. I made excuses for me, I made excuses for him. He’s been on tour for almost two years and he still has almost four more months to go. It’s changed both of us. It’s been beyond challenging.”
She sighed. “We said we’d never let the fame and our careers get in the way, but we have. We’re
