Everything in the room made me feel like home. I still felt guilty being here. I was finally fitting in and I was starting to enjoy my life again. I wanted to be brave and give Beau more, but I told myself one day at a time. One step at a time.
The Montgomery house was a rather large cabin and you could tell that someone had spent a good amount of time making it a home. I wondered if his grandfather had built this home with his own hands?
Little touches here and there made me think of my own parents. Their house would never be this fancy, but I remember how much time they put into making our much smaller house a home. I’d kept my promise to Mama after I’d moved out to call her nightly and I could tell that she wanted more, but I still wasn’t ready for more. Maybe, eventually.
“You just gonna stand there gawkin’ or you gonna join me on the couch?” Reagan was looking at me like I’d lost my marbles and some days I truly thought I had.
“Scoot over, loser. My butt’s bigger than that.”
“Pssshhhhh… we all know you have the nicest butt around. Just ask my brother, he’d verify it sooner than you can swat a horse fly.” My face blushed a crimson red in embarrassment.
I’ll admit Beau and I had gotten to know each other better the last couple of days but I still didn’t want to hear about him thinking my butt was delectable from his sister. Although, it was nice to feel desired even if it wasn’t coming directly from him.
My eyes drifted to the clock on the wall. “Speaking of, where is that brother of yours?”
“Well, he said he had some errands to run in town but that was a couple of hours ago. He should’ve been back by now.” He’s never this late. Right as I started to get worried, headlights flashed at us through the front window.
“Speak of the devil and he shall appear,” she said laughing. I shook my head. Beau Montgomery was far from the devil unless of course, you were talking about a handsome devil. Then, yes. He was definitely the devil.
I watched as he ran through the rain from his truck and I ran to the front door to open it for him.
“Hey darlin’, he said with a soft kiss to my cheek. “You happy to see me?”
The blush that had disappeared just a minute ago was back in full force. I ran to him automatically and I was really questioning what the hell was going on with me. I told myself that I couldn’t be with him yet and then I pulled a stunt like that. I had to wonder if my heart and head were confused about what we wanted. But I knew the answer to that.
“Maybe a little,” I said shyly. He picked me up and swung me around before holding me tight for a hug. I squealed in shock, but I couldn’t help but admit how much I liked being in his arms. I felt safe. He set me back on my feet again and I immediately felt the loss of his warmth against my skin. I didn’t like it one bit and that right there told me I was already in way too deep now. I wasn’t coming out unscathed. I was in this thing.
“I’m starving. What’d y’all have for dinner? Please tell me there are some leftovers?” Memories of the first night Andrew verbally abused me hit like a boulder. My breath caught in my throat as I remembered his words, cold as ice. “Where’s my food? You should’ve had it ready when I got here… I deserve more than leftovers.” An intense wave of fear flooded me. The room started to spin and I felt like I was going to throw up
“Cassidy Mae… baby? Darlin’ what’s wrong?” He was talking to me. I could hear him, but there was a fog.
“What’s going on?” He asked Reagan as he tried to figure out why I’d just dropped out of nowhere. I was shaking. My throat was closing up and my heart threatened to pound out of my chest. I couldn’t breathe. They were too close to me. I had to get away. I started scooting on my butt backwards as fast as I could go.
“Beau, think about it? What did you just say? Do you remember her saying anything about a missed dinner? Think bro… think…” Reagan shook Beau’s shoulders. I didn’t hear the words, but I knew they were talking about me. My world was crashing down. Spinning. “Shit… I mentioned being hungry and wanting dinner. The night she told him she was pregnant… He came home late and dinner wasn’t ready like he wanted… I screwed up Reagan. What do I do?”
“Help her.” He walked slowly towards me. My breathing was still erratic and I was still trembling all over. I hadn’t had a panic attack in a while but I knew these were the signs of one.
“Breathe, Cass. Come on darlin’… that’s it, slow breaths.” He took both of my hands and started raising and lowering them which was weird but was actually starting to help me.
“Ok, Cass. Name five things around you. The first five things you see. Come on, you can do it.” I was
