Ginny let out a sob and pushed her chair back. She leaned over and pulled Constance to her, kissing the top of her head. Constance couldn’t stop the tears from spilling over, and as they traced their way down her cheeks, she felt a part of herself close down.
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Constance was dragging her heels, her brown suitcase banging against her thigh as Ginny urged her on. They were making their way up the long driveway to Saint Augustine House. ‘We’re expected at eleven, Constance so do come on we don’t want to be late. That would get things off to a bad start.’
The Mother and Baby Home was set well back from the road and hidden away from prying eyes as the driveway curved around it loomed in front of them. It was a sprawling manor house shrouded by trees with a curtain of ivy clinging to the bricks around the front entrance. Its abundance of chimney stacks gave a clue as to the many rooms tucked away inside. It would have been rather grand in its day, but now it looked as though it were sagging under the weight of time. Tiles were missing from the roof, and the paint on the gables had all but flaked off. Its myriad of windows made Constance feel as though they were being watched and she was assailed with an urge to turn on her heel and run. But where would she go? She couldn’t go home not until after the baby was born. Her hand rested protectively against her belly as she reluctantly followed Ginny’s lead up the stairs to the imposing entrance.
The front door swung open before Ginny had a chance to rap the lion’s head knocker. A woman of indeterminable age whose austerity was not softened by her drab grey matron’s uniform stood before them and taking in her pinched features, Constance felt her knees beginning to tremble.
‘Constance Downer?’ she asked in an accent Constance couldn’t pinpoint other than it was northern. She gave Constance and Ginny a tight-lipped smile, which did nothing to soften her severity, as Constance managed a nod. ‘I’m Matron Holt; I’ve been expecting you. Reverend Hayles’ church has been a generous benefactor of ours in the past which was why I’ve made room for you. We have twelve girls here at any given time, but we found an extra bed when he wrote and informed me of the situation you find yourself in. And you must be Mrs Virginia Downer?’ She looked down her long nose at Ginny.
‘Yes, good morning Matron Holt. Thank you for being here to greet us. It’s very good of you.’ Ginny was bright and breezy, determined not to be intimidated least Constance pick up on it.
‘Very good. Right well, don’t just stand on the doorstep girls, come in. We have some paperwork to do, and then I shall give you a tour of Saint Augustine’s.’
The door shut behind them and Constance felt trapped as she stood in the gloom of the foyer. Her sense of foreboding intensified as she followed matron’s clicking shoes. Matron Holt bypassed the sweeping staircase with a nod in its direction. ‘The front staircase is for our nursing staff and visitors only. There is a back entrance and staircase the girls use. I shall show you where it is once the necessary forms have been filled in.’ She ushered them into her office. ‘Have a seat please.’
Ginny and Constance quickly sat down in the empty seats in front of matron’s desk while she took herself around to the other side and settled herself before opening her desk drawer. She produced a pair of glasses, which she slid on to the end of her nose before opening the file that sat on the top of a pile of identical ones stacked on the desk. She took a sheet of paper from it and handed it and a pen to Constance. ‘I need you to sign this please. And you too, Mrs Downer, in your capacity as Constance’s guardian while she is staying with us here at Saint Augustine’s.’
Constance wasn’t sure what it was she was signing, but she obliged by putting her signature to the form. She had no wish to experience the sharp end of matron’s tongue by questioning her as to what it was for. Ginny took the time to read over the document before doing the same and sliding it back across the table. Matron Holt gave it a cursory glance. ‘That’s all in order,’ she said, placing the form back in the file and closing it. ‘If you’d like to follow me please.’ She got to her feet and smoothed the creases in her skirt before marching forth.
Constance’s eyes were wide as she looked around at what would be her home for the next four months as matron led them further down the hallway to where what once would have been the servants’ entrance and staircase were located. There was a sense of sadness about the house, she decided, and the weary furnishings and peeling wallpaper did not help it.
‘We’re very fortunate to have a maternity wing here at Saint Augustine’s for when baby arrives, Constance. It’s on the Southside, for the sunshine.’
Constance wasn’t sure if a reply was expected from her or not, but before she could decide whether she should voice her agreement that yes they were fortunate when she felt anything but, matron spoke again.
‘We’re all about routines here at St Augustine’s; we find it makes the time pass quickly for our girls if they know what is expected of them each day. The girls rise at seven o’clock and then we have prayers at seven-fifteen followed by
