“Lady Gorem,” Alex interjected. “What a pleasure to find you here.” The words were nice, but his tone belied the sentiment. “I’ve been hoping to find a moment to speak to you about courting your daughter.”
Abigail’s eyes widened and her heart rate quickened with alarm. What was he doing? Her gaze flickered to a stricken Lily and a clearly horrified Marigold. It was the sight of Marigold that had the pieces clicking into place at last.
The kiss.
Marigold had told Lily, that was why they were here. Word must have spread and now the major was trying to do right by her at the cost of his own happiness.
Oh, Alex. Kind, noble, selfless Alex.
Her heart twisted in her chest as her mother’s mouth flapped open and shut. It would have been comical if Abigail’s world was not being thrown upside down. “What is the meaning of this?” When her mother finally spoke, the question was aimed at her, accusations clear in her eyes. “What have you done?”
“I beg your pardon, Lady Gorem, but I believe this is a conversation best had between you and me. In private.”
“Pardon me?” Abigail managed, anger rising up inside of her and bringing with it some semblance of clarity. What did he think he was doing?
Saving her. The answer was obvious. He thought he was saving her reputation.
Her heart was still twisting—no, breaking in her chest. But anger was familiar and gave her strength. “You mean to discuss my future with my mother? Don’t you think you ought to consult with me first, Major?”
His gaze shifted to her and landed on her like a weight. She tried not to flinch again at the heaviness of it. Of the heat and the passion that she saw there.
“You’re right,” he said. “Apologies. I heard your mother say she would choose your husband and thought perhaps I’d best make it known to her that this would not be necessary.”
“And why not?” Her mother drew herself up to her full height. “I don’t know who you think you are, sir, but—”
“I am the man who means to propose to your daughter,” he said. His tone was steel, his words arrows that pierced straight through her heart.
It was everything she wanted. She realized that as soon as he said it. With his words came image upon image of what a life with this man would look like and it was...well, it was heaven. A life filled with love. With understanding. With learning and growing and being challenged. Her heart ached as an image of a family filled her mind and took her breath away.
She loved him.
Oh goodness, she loved him more than she loved herself. More than she’d ever loved anything or anyone.
But this…
His gaze moved to meet hers once more and all she could see was his righteous anger on her behalf. In his eyes she saw resolve. Determination.
Not love.
She swallowed past a knot in her throat that threatened to choke her. Everyone in this room was staring at her. Waiting for a response.
He was offering her everything. A dream come true. The life she’d never dared to imagine for herself.
But it would be at the expense of his happiness. He would make her his wife because he was so good. So upright and moral, and so much better than she deserved.
The silence as everyone waited for her to respond grew deafening but she could not speak. She couldn’t even breathe. Her heart was hammering as her mind raced. Her hands were shaking so badly she had to clasp them in front of her as she tried once more to swallow, to breathe.
One more seemingly endless moment of silence passed before everyone seemed to start speaking at once. Well, everyone but her.
“Major, I don’t know who you think you are,” her mother started.
“Perhaps Abigail and I might have a moment alone,” the major was saying over her in that calm, determined voice. The voice of a major on a mission.
“Lily and I will just excuse ourselves,” Marigold said as she tugged on her friend’s arm, though Lily was still gawking and made no move to leave.
Their voices were drowned out by the sound of her blood roaring past her ears. Humiliation, and anger, regret and despair. The emotions were too many and myriad to name, but all that mattered was she was drowning in them.
She needed air. She needed space.
Abigail knew not how she ought to respond, but she knew that she could not stay here.
She drew in a deep, steadying breath and heard Alex say, “Please, Lady Gorem. I must insist on a moment alone with your daughter so we might discuss—”
“There is no need.” She shocked herself with her cool tone and every person in the room grew silent and wide-eyed as they turned once more to face her. She forced herself to meet the major’s gaze one last time.
She bit her lip to hold back the urge to weep at the thought that this might be the last time she looked into his eyes like this. “There is no need,” she said evenly. “There is nothing for us to discuss. I have no intention of marrying you, Major.” She hitched up her skirts, looking away like a coward before she could see his response. “Now, if you’ll excuse me…”
She was already heading toward the door and no one tried to stop her. Only silence followed her, but the moment she shut the door behind her she heard the voices start up at once.
She didn’t stick around to hear what they said. Her steps were far quicker than a proper lady’s ought to be as she made her way through the hallways, ignoring other guests as she headed toward the stairs leading to her rooms. Her eyes stung with unshed tears, her breath was coming in harsh gasps. She’d finally made it to the bottom of the staircase when Lily’s voice stopped her. “Abigail, wait.”
She wanted to ignore her old friend, but Lily always had been faster than
