“I can see why, but you need never be ashamed of your struggle. It’s the shame, not the struggle that will consume your self-worth.”
I shook my head, trying to make sense of what he’d just said.
“But Papa, how could you have let him treat me that way? Couldn’t you have helped me avoid this situation? Now, all I can think about is an escape but how can I? I’ve become so entangled in this mess.”
“You had the power of choice and self-will. I couldn’t save you from the situation. Not like you think. We all have to live with the consequences of our choices. As you know, the fact that you’re an Eri, with access to Luenah doesn’t exempt you from trouble.”
“Am I being punished like Jonah?” I groaned. “Like Jonah, I should have known right from wrong. Papa, have I done an unforgivable thing by choosing Albert?”
“I don’t think you fully understand, my dear. Jonah was not swallowed by the big fish as retribution for his crime. God doesn’t derive pleasure in punishing His people. Jonah was swallowed to receive protection from the sea. Now, picture this. The belly of a whale is large. There was air. Jonah could breathe. Then, think of the alternative. If the whale had not swallowed Jonah, one of three things could have happened. He could have been swept away by a current, drowned, or been eaten by a shark. God allowed the whale to swallow Jonah, so He could protect him while He matured him. Even though he disobeyed God and stubbornly chose the path he thought would bring him happiness while ignoring directions, God still had a plan for him. Like Jonah, your entanglement with Albert does not signify the end of the road for you. Though it may sound ludicrous, you need to have faith and recognize that the situation may have arisen for your benefit. It may be God offering you protection and an opportunity to mature. What Albert did to you is an abomination, and it was not your fault, so you need to stop beating yourself up.”
“I understand now, Papa, but I blew it. I’m sure all this has something to do with the box and the exchange it’s supposed to receive. I felt it in my heart and soul the moment Okem disappeared. Even now, I still can’t fathom what I should have given in exchange.”
“Every choice we make has its own set of unique outcomes. You love Okem, but because you focused on pursuing what you thought would bring you happiness, you missed your chance to be with him. Even before Okem disappeared, you weren’t sure if you should give up the comfort Albert could afford you for the plain life Okem would have given you. The fact that Okem eavesdropped on your conversation is irrelevant when you consider that the exchange was completed long before that fateful day. You weren’t really sold on him, and he knew that in his soul. Exchanges have time limits. If one misses the chance to give the foremost exchange for love or duty and focuses on their quest for happiness, they must wade through life waiting and searching for the next opportunity to provide a worthy enough exchange to get them where they need to be.”
“How long must I wait? And will things stay as they are?”
“I can’t say, but here is an encouraging thought: We humans often miss the foremost path. Most times through our own fault and sometimes, through no fault of our own. No matter what, God will still deliver you to your destination. The subsequent paths will be more arduous than the foremost one, but regardless, you will learn all the lessons you need along the way. You may have missed your first route, but don’t panic. Remain steadfast, and you will soon get back on the right track as soon as your exchange is complete.”
“Encouraging? Yes. Calming? Not so much,” I said through pursed lips.
He shrugged.
“If only you knew who walked with you, you wouldn’t say that.”
“But Okem is the only man I have ever loved. Is it too late? Will I ever see him again? Will I ever achieve my purpose? And what if someone doesn’t give an exchange at all?”
“Of course, you’ll still achieve your purpose,” my grandfather said, shaking his head. “And if someone doesn’t give an exchange at all, life will offer one for them. You see, my child, there are multiple paths to one’s purpose, and exchanges are made at the point of choosing a path. If you fail to make the right exchange at any point in time, you may have difficulty getting on the right path, but you’ll eventually get there. You’re probably closer than you know. The detour does not have the power to keep you from your destination.”
“I guess I missed my way then. I boarded a ship to Tarshish instead of Nineveh.”
He chuckled. “You’re only human, and you’re still alive, so there is still a chance for you to turn things around.”
“Haven’t I already missed out on love? I’m sure Albert is not the one and Okem—”
“Shh,” he said, placing his index finger over his mouth. “Be careful what you say. You should have learned the power in your words by now. Just like your thoughts, your words have immense power to either transform or sustain your reality. That is the power of invocation.”
“I understand, Papa.”
As he spoke, I sighted the pointed tips of the shrine in the distance. Something about the halo effect of the clouds around them, reminded me of the people I’d seen walking around earlier with wreaths over their heads. I opened my mouth to ask my grandfather about them, but he spoke before I could utter a word.
“You see,” my grandfather continued, “I want to explain this without confusing you. The right love will impact your purpose, which, in return, will impact your duty. When all these elements work together in harmony, you find fulfillment—the greatest
