"It will take time," he said. "But, if we become an Apostle, we’ll be part of the Infernalis and able to enact change. Convince others to listen to us. And do more than what we’re doing right now. And it could even take less time, since some Disciples are allowed into the Infernalis too. It depends. But it’s all the same in the end."
"So what do we do until then? Just let it continue happening? Do I just ignore what’s going on right in front of me?" I glared at Karna, as I waited expectantly for his response.
He looked down at his palms, and slowly balled it into a fist. "These injustices, they should not— no, they can not— be tolerated. It reviles me, knowing that people like Victor are committing such acts while pretending to be a Dark Crusader. And it angers me, knowing that my people are treated with contempt across the world too. But all these feelings— I use it to give me strength. To make me stronger, so I can do something about it."
He wanted to fix the problem from the inside, and prevent it from happening again. It made sense: that would help a lot of people. But still, that solution did not satisfy me.
"I don’t think I can do that, Karna. It’s… too much for me."
The Goblin walked up to me, and placed a hand on my shoulder. "Then I’ll give you the strength you need. After all, we’re friends, right?"
I stared at Karna, and I saw his resolve, his determination to do what he believed was right. And I agreed with him. I was grateful to him for trying to help. So I smiled. But…
There is still something.
Later that night, I could not sleep. I tossed and turned in bed, even though I knew it never helped with falling asleep. I could not stop thinking about that young woman— the Captain in charge of Fort Conon.
I was nothing like her: she was a soldier, while I was a slave; she was from this world, while I was from another; she had been raped, while I have only had nightmares of it. And yet, I felt for her.
It was not because she was a girl. There was more to this than being the same sex as her. And it certainly was not because we were both Humans. If I found a Beastkin or a Goblin in the same situation, I knew I’d be as equally reviled.
It was like torture. But even torture had a goal. This was senseless torture. An act only to derive pleasure for Victor.
There was no logic behind it; no justifications for it.
Gerritt told me to compromise. To give up some of my values to benefit as many people as possible. I could see his logic in that.
Karna told me to change the Dark Crusaders. Climb my way up the hierarchy of the Infernalis, and end the system which enabled innocents from being hurt, obviating any future suffering. I could see the justification behind that. But there was something still there. Something which I saw, that they did not. And that was:
Victor. And he stood over a young woman and—
I saw the young woman suffering, but they didn’t. In a literal and figurative sense, they did not see what I saw. That allowed them to see something else— to gain a different perspective from me.
But I saw what I saw.
I liked Gerritt, Karna, Ihsan, and I had liked even Victor— despite his actions. I had to change him. Maybe with a compromise. Whatever it was, I just had to stop him from doing it ever again.
So if a compromise was necessary, then let Gerritt compromise. If change was necessary, then let Karna bring about change.
They were not wrong; they were right in their own way.
And I was right too. She was suffering. That was evinced by the look on her face.
So I had to stop it; put an end to her suffering. I was not an idiot. I was hoping— praying to any god who would listen to me— that this went smoothly. I knew that if this went badly, I would make an enemy out of the Dark Crusaders.
But still, I have to help her, I told myself.
Help her? Why would I do that?
Because I can help her.
But why?
To help her.
It was a circular reasoning; flawed in many ways. But she was right in front of me.
I couldn’t help it. I had to do something.
And as I stood alone amongst the growing fire; as the young woman and the other prisoners made their escape; as Victor stepped into the burning building, approaching me with unbridled rage, I finally knew...
It was the right decision.
Chapter 37: The Right Decision
I stood amidst the flames as the wooden building collapsed around me. The fire was scorching through the entire structure, tearing down the walls of the dungeon.
It was hot. Raging. Burning. But it did not touch me. It engulfed everything in its path, but was staved away by my magic.
I could have left. I could have joined the young woman and the other prisoners when I freed them. They looked apprehensive; slightly afraid of me. But they were grateful. They were even willing to bring me with them.
And yet, I chose not to go with them.
Instead, I stood here. Because I was waiting.
I was not going to run. I made my decision, and I was going to stick to it. So I waited.
And he came.
***
Victor was annoyed.
What should have been some good alone time was quickly soured the moment Melas found him. She got mad at him, and stormed off— ignoring everything he had to
