The traffic light switched to green, and my mind accelerated with the car. I might be able to fix the bowl—find an epoxy or something to glue the pieces together. Charlie couldn’t eat from it then, but he’d be able to use it for something. Fix bowl landed at the top of my mental to-do list as I opened the door to our house.
Theo was nowhere to be seen but wouldn’t have gone far. He rarely pushed back against my preference for “no driving alone,” and his car was in the garage; I exhaled a large, relieved breath. Like it or not, Theo would have to wait and so would any discussion of my prior “bad parenting” moment. I would fashion a good excuse for my unacceptable behavior during my slight reprieve. Before I asked where Theo was, Charlie barreled toward me.
“Mom! I have that camp project to work on, and I want to be able to show the leader what I’m doing sometime this week. Can you help?” Concern flooded Charlie’s eyes as he handed me Lexie’s sippy cup, covered with stuck-on cereal bits and melted cheese. I worked to pry off the cheese, but there was no hope, so I tossed the cup into the sink for washing later.
“Yes, the project. I guess Dad can’t help with it, can he?” The habit of passing off work to Theo wasn’t something I engaged in, but if he handled part of the task, then I could prepare lunch for the five of us—a job Theo wouldn’t try to take on since some activities took too much patience.
“Well, no...but...come to think of it, I guess I don’t need actual help. I need to use the computer and printer,” said Charlie. “And Lexie can be with me. She can help me choose pictures.”
A huge smile passed across Lexie’s face as she reached out a chubby hand to her beloved brother. I leaned to pat Lexie’s bum, checking the diaper contents, and then straightened back up, smiling at my youngest daughter and marveling at her admiration for Charlie.
“Yes, of course you can use the computer. Go ahead and get my laptop but take it in the dining room. When you’re ready to print, I can help you.” Turning over the lunch possibilities in my mind, I strode to the kitchen. A trip to the grocery store needed to happen soon, but the thought of going to the store set my mind on edge. Instead? The babysitter. A note on the kitchen wall whiteboard would remind me to speak with Brooke later.
“Thanks, Mom. And by the way, the hospital called.” Charlie’s voice and face were devoid of worry, but the word hospital always caused a toothache. I turned around, my back to the kitchen sink.
“The hospital? Or the therapist? Did they tell you why? Did they leave a message?” What did they want? Despite his fatigue, Theo’s overall mental health seemed balanced. At least I thought so.
“I’m not sure, Mom. She gave me her name and number, and I guess I thought it was the hospital. I left the paper by the phone. She said to tell you she wanted to talk to you, and she’d be there until eleven thirty today.”
Charlie always got most the details right. I checked the watch on my wrist and exhaled a heavy breath. Practitioners normally called my cell phone. “Did you see if your dad was around?”
Charlie tipped his head back, looking at me sheepishly. “Well...he was asleep.”
Annoyance coursed through me, and I slammed my hands against the surface of the countertop. “Asleep?”
Charlie shrugged. “Yeah.”
“The whole time I was gone?” My irritation grew with each beat of my heart.
“Um, yes.”
“If he was asleep, who was watching Lexie and Delia?” Fury replaced irritation. I didn’t mind hiring Brooke when necessary—and in this case, asking her to come back—but Theo had to tell me when we needed her or to call her himself. He. Knew. That. Theo had said he’d be fine for sixty minutes. And I had been gone for fifty-eight.
“It’s okay, Mom. I—”
“Don’t argue with me, please.”
Charlie held up his small hand. “But you have to listen. Dad needed the sleep, really. So, I had the girls work on a craft in the basement, and I helped them. It wasn’t too hard for them and actually, we had a great time.”
With a sigh, I pulled Charlie into my arms and pushed my face into his hair. He was still young enough to embrace me back, his strong but wiry arms stretching around my middle. “Taking care of the girls isn’t your responsibility, Charlie. I’m so thankful you were an awesome big brother but looking after your sisters is my job or Dad’s or Brooke’s. Next time, call me.”
Charlie pulled away from me, his eyes big and round. “I did, Mom,” he whispered. “I called, but there was no answer.”
Bless me, Father, for I have sinned. Again. This time, I didn’t find the phrase funny.
Chapter 10: Theo
Monday morning came too soon. Fire raced underneath my skin, and my muscles coiled, ready for action. Once Brooke had left to take Lexie for a walk and Charlie and Delia had gone on to camp, Sadie and I were the only two left in the house. One thing I learned from Doc was the power of clearing the air. Now was the time. A clink and clank of dishes being put away meant Sadie was in the kitchen. As I entered the room, she stood at the counter, preparing her coffee for the road. I pulled a mug from the cabinet, poured myself coffee, and reached for the milk. With shaking hands, I splashed milk onto the countertop and knocked a stray water glass as I reached for the paper towels. In two steps, Sadie had the dishrag in her hand and sighed at the spreading puddle.
Sighs had always annoyed me, especially from Sadie, and my mind pushed back at the inclination to say something
