I must have lost all the coloring in my face.
“What is it?” he said.
“That’s his hat.”
Jacob looked at his feet and then reached for it.
“Don’t touch it,” I cried.
He froze, still bent over, his hand just inches from the brim.
“Why not?” he asked. “Maybe we can bring it to the police as—”
“No,” I replied. “Just don’t touch it. Please.”
What was I afraid of? That Jacob would somehow be tainted by the offending hat? I wasn’t sure, but every cell in my body wanted to be as far away from where we were as quickly as possible.
“I just want to go,” I blurted out. “Now. Will you take me home?”
Jacob had regained a vertical position. “Of course.”
We had accomplished absolutely nothing, but I wasn’t the least bit disappointed. I stole a few glances at Jacob on the way home, and for the first time in a while, I felt like smiling.
“Are you hungry?” he asked as we neared my apartment.
“Yeah, I am.” My stomach had been grumbling the last few miles.
We decided on takeout, and soon, just as we had so many times before, we were sprawled out on my living room floor, digging into food cartons.
“You haven’t been shaving again,” I said.
He ran a hand around the scruff that once again covered his jaw. “Yeah, suits me better.” His gaze fell on his food. “At least, that’s what I remember someone telling me once.”
My cheeks burned as I stabbed at another piece of sushi.
“So, you’re teaching classes at the dance studio now?” Jacob said before loading lo mein into his mouth.
“Yeah, just two nights a week.”
“How do you like it?”
“It’s good,” I said after swallowing a piece of sushi. “I, uh…I actually love it.”
He smiled, toothy with his deep dimples showing. It made me feel like I was full of sunlight.
I readjusted the chopsticks between my fingers. “It made me realize something…”
“What’s that?”
“My major. I went to my advisor’s office last week and declared one—teaching, elementary school.”
Jacob stopped mid-chew. “That’s really great to hear, Maeve.”
“You think?” I asked. I still wasn’t sure if the idea of me being a teacher wasn’t completely ridiculous.
“Absolutely.”
The smile I’d felt creeping up all day had finally broken through.
Jacob threw away the empty containers, and I wiped the coffee table clean.
“Thanks for checking on me,” I said.
“Of course,” he said. “We’re still friends, right?”
I nodded. “Sure. That’ll never change.” We each hovered on opposite sides of the room. “Well, don’t feel like you have to stick around. I know you probably have somewhere to be.”
“I don’t have anywhere to be,” he said without hesitation.
A tidal wave of relief washed over me.
“Do you want to watch something?” I said, gesturing to the television.
“Sounds good to me.”
I went into the bedroom to change into pajamas. When I came back into the room, Jacob patted the spot next to him on the couch.
I stood on the threshold of the kitchen and living room and just stared at him.
“What’s wrong?” he said with a tone of concern.
I soaked in the image of him, just sitting there, his beauty effortlessly improving everything around him, including me.
“Nothing,” I murmured. “Nothing at all.”
And as I slid into the spot next to him, his arm draping over my shoulder, everything felt right once again.
* * * *
That morning I woke up in Jacob’s embrace.
“How long have you been up?” I asked him. Every muscle in my body ached as I sat up.
“About twenty minutes.” His hand absentmindedly stroked my hair. “You want breakfast?”
I nodded and soon he was off to grab coffee and something to eat. I gingerly washed my face, realizing it was the first morning I didn’t feel like I’d woken up with a rock in my stomach. The swelling had almost disappeared, but the stitches in my lip were prominent. Purple and blue highlighted my cheek bones. The scrapes on my knees and butt were scabbed.
Jacob was back in fifteen minutes. I was almost sure he was afraid to leave me alone too long.
“What do you want to do today?” he asked after we were through with breakfast.
“Nothing.” I could have stayed locked inside of that apartment together forever.
“Maybe we should get you a new phone,” he said.
“I don’t have the money for a new phone.”
“Don’t worry about that,” Jacob said. “You need a phone, and I’m going to make sure you have one.”
“Are you sure you want to be seen with me looking like this?”
He looked me square in the eye. “You look beautiful. Fuck what everyone else thinks.”
Jacob coaxed me out of the door and to the mall. I cowered behind him as he led me to the right place. His grip on my hand never weakened.
I had to admit, having a phone again made me feel a little better. Like things were getting back to normal.
“Thank you, Jacob,” I said, trying to figure out how to check my voicemail as he drove back to the apartment.
“You’re welcome.” His smile quickly dropped from his face when he noticed my expression. “What is it?”
I replayed the voicemail just to be sure I’d heard it right. “Someone from the police station called. Said they found a guy matching my description. He got picked up for a DWI. He’s been in trouble with this kind of thing before…”
I locked my phone and let it fall into my lap.
“It’s going to be okay, Maeve.” He reached for my hand.
I believed him. But in the back of my head, I was counting down the minutes until he would go back to his life and wouldn’t be there to remind me of that every now and then.
Back at the apartment, we spent the rest of the day curled up on the couch, watching movies. We both seemed content not to move, only to pop in a new movie into the DVD player.
It felt so good where I was, wrapped in his arms. But I should have been forcing myself to get up. Tricking myself into thinking things
