“Brooks, please...” I pleaded with him, but it was like he didn’t hear me. He was off in his own world. I earned every dagger he sent my way. I did this to him. I caused him all this pain. I caused this.
“Do you have any idea the theories that went through my mind after you took off? I wondered what I did wrong. I wondered where I went wrong because I would have done anything for you. I thought there was some other rebound guy you were seeing who happened to say all the right words to you—the words I didn’t know how to express. The words that were on the tip of my tongue every single second of every day.”
I slid to the ground and held my face through my cries.
“You left me broken. You left me to go through my divorce alone. She met someone new, and I was still laying where you left me, broken. You, Erika... you broke me. She never broke me. I never loved her.” He laughed. “Can you believe it took me so long to realize I never even loved her? It was an enormous weight lifted from my shoulders when she moved out that day. I never shed one tear for her. I shed them all for you. Every single tear I cried was from you, and for you.”
I begged for him to stop.
“I don’t know what I ever did to make you disappear like you did. Understand how I feel. How you left me. I came here to see you one last time. Just to see you. I don’t even know why, but I needed to see you. And you know what? All those feelings are still there. It hurts me so much to see you, but I love it. I’d hurt every day like this if I could see you. That’s what I told myself. There’s something about you that makes me feel alive, even if it’s almost too painful to bear.”
He knelt in front of me and set his hands on my shoulders. He then tilted my head against the wall and stared in my eyes. “I am so in love with you,” he confided as he wiped my eyes and kissed my lips. “Don’t do this to me.”
“I don’t know what I’m doing...” I sobbed. “I don’t want to make you feel that way ever again. I hate myself for how things ended, for how things went. I’ll never forgive myself...”
“Shhh.” He put his finger over my lips. “It’s over. The past is the past. We can move on from here.”
I nodded.
Both of us jumped at someone knocking on the door.
“It’s your neighbor,” Brooks said in an offended tone. “Why does he always show up unannounced like this?”
“I’ll take care of him,” I said as I stood, dried my eyes, and headed for the patio doors.
“Hey.” I smiled as I let him inside.
Easton looked at me, then at Brooks. “Ah... Am I interrupting anything?”
“No,” I answered as I blotted my eyes again.
Easton gave Brooks an awkward glance.
“You ever have someone in your past just show back up out of the blue, and you realize how much you love that person? But you regret how you left things?”
Easton just stood silently as I closed the patio doors.
“Well,” I continued. “Easton, Brooks and I... go back a few years, and I moved here without ever saying goodbye. Now, I’m just regretting how I just up and left and...”
“Oh, dear,” he responded as his eyes darted back and forth between Brooks and me.
“You’re Mr. out of the blue, I’m guessing,” Easton said as he stared at Brooks.
“Convicted and committed.” Brooks smiled.
“I’m just going to tell you two one thing...”
“What’s that?” I asked.
“Make up. Work it out and never let each other go. With that being said, I’ll go. I just wanted to make sure both of you were doing okay.”
Brooks and I grinned.
“Yes, we’re both doing fine,” I replied as I wandered towards the island and sat on one of the tall chairs.
“Okay, well, I’ll let myself out, and you two work it out. Let me know if you need anything.”
“Thank you,” Brooks and I spoke in unison.
Brooks followed him to the patio door and latched it after Easton left.
“I thought you said he rarely comes around?” Brooks asked.
“He barely does. This is the most he’s stopped by in months.” I shrugged as I took some deep breaths. “Also, this is the first winter storm I’ve been through up here, so maybe he’s just checking in to make sure I’m handling things okay.”
“There’s something odd about him. The way he looks at you. The way he comes to your patio door like he’s more than a neighbor.”
“Brooks, you need to stop right there.”
“Well...” He shrugged his shoulders. “Just from my observations.”
“Well, they’re wrong. I hardly know the man. In fact, you probably know him now, just as much as I do.”
“I need to take a shower,” he blurted as he left the room and headed upstairs.
I didn’t say anything. It felt like both of us needed some space and a little time to sift through everything that was said. I didn’t blame Brooks for hurting, and I was ashamed he had to carry that inside all these years. How was I to know he was alone? I didn’t have the energy to bring up her name yet and why I avoided talking to him altogether. It was nothing he did, it was her. And I wasn’t talking about his ex-wife. I could’ve dealt with the hatred from his ex-wife, but this other girl. She pushed it all over the edge. And he hadn’t brought up her name once. Why?
Chapter Five
