I was a little tipsy by that point, so my response was more enthusiastic than I had planned. "Why the hell would you say that? It was your idea." I gave him an evil smile.
"Effie, I hope you're not pinning this on me. I just wanted to outline the options available to you. When you gain five pounds because you're sitting on the couch eating a pint of Ben & Jerry's every night while you watch romcoms, don't come crying to me." He laughed, the prick.
"Dammit, Jesse! Why did you have to mention ice cream? Does that party store down the street have it?" I couldn't stop thinking about it after he said it. "And shut up! I'm not going to do that every night. Only tonight."
Jesse gave me one of those award-winning, future-CEO smiles. "I think they do," he said. "It's two dollars more than at the supermarket, though. Drunk people are always willing to pay more."
"Yeah, and we're drunk people," I said proudly.
"You are. I'm only a buzzed person."
"And how much will buzzed people pay?" I asked.
"Somewhere between sober and drunk pricing." He finished his glass of wine and then filled it back to the top. "But I'll be joining you soon enough."
I felt really lucky to have Jesse at that moment. He was essentially the only friend I had in this gigantic city. We lived together, but hell, that could have meant so much less. You didn't have to be friends with someone just because you were roommates. Getting along was important, but friendship was never a requirement.
Suddenly Jesse's phone vibrated loudly against the table. I waited that crucial second to see if it was a call or just a text. It vibrated again. Call.
"Dammit, it's Laura. I'll just be a couple of minutes." He grabbed the phone and headed toward the living room. "Hey, babe, how was your day? He what?" His voice grew fainter as he moved down the hall, away from me. Some juicy bit of gossip was spilling into his ear.
In that moment, I didn't like being alone one bit, especially not after hearing Jesse talk to Laura. It made me infinitely jealous, my inebriation critical to that emotional flare-up. Immediately, I thought to call Jack, to tell him that I had made a mistake only a couple of hours after saying we needed a break.
I was thinking about his apartment and that fancy chair, his tongue against my tender, sensitive flesh. My quivering thighs, the grand rescue in the coffee shop, the dark secret from the past and the weakness and humanity around it...
"I'll go get ice cream!" I declared to no one but the nearly empty pizza box and wine bottles. I didn't want to wait for Jesse and I needed the distraction. I didn't want to be frail, but hell, tonight I was going to do what I wanted and make the most of it. Just tonight.
I grabbed my purse and took off down the stairs, clutching the railing for support. The sky was dark and it looked like a storm was imminent. The party store was only two blocks away though, so I decided to risk it all for some ice cream. It was just a little water, right?
After crossing the street, I noticed a figure that looked all too familiar, initially thinking it was Jack, due to my chaotic mind. And then, the figure turned around abruptly after noticing me. I walked forward and then curiously tapped on his shoulder. It was Sam.
"Sam! What the hell are you doing in my part of town? I thought you lived in Manhattan!" I should have probably been worried about my slurred speech, but I didn't really care.
He looked strung out and shocked to see me. "I didn't even know you lived around here! I'm... I'm meeting someone at a restaurant close by." Our eyes broke contact. "It's uh, a Greek place."
"It's not that super fancy one, is it?" I asked politely. "I could never afford something like—"
"Super fancy? I doubt that." His words were forced and cold. "I'm on a budget for the immediate future, so I hope it's not the super fancy one since I agreed to pay." He let out a really hollow, unctuous laugh. I could smell the strong scent of whiskey on his breath.
I tried to recall the name, but the Greek word just wouldn't come to my drunk mind. "Oh, whatever, Sam. Is everything okay?" Sadness oozed from his pores like sweat.
"Yeah, yeah. Sure." His phone buzzed in his pocket and he pulled it out and glanced at it. "I gotta run though, Effie. I'll see you tomorrow at work."
"Bye, Sam!" I raucously shouted at his back. He took off in the wrong direction, his brisk pace not unlike he was fleeing something. "I think it's the other way, Sam!" I wasn't sure if he heard me or not. He kept walking anyway.
I shrugged it off and headed to the party store, worried again about the storm. Sam had actually been a nice distraction, because now that I was alone, I felt weak and hopeless and wished he, the man that had heavily contributed to my confusing situation, were back. It was weird.
My feet moved independently of my brain, but it was quite an effort to keep going. My mind juggled images of Jack and me, as well as fleeting images of ice cream. It was purely ridiculous, but what control did I really have over my drunken thoughts?
I got into the party store and headed straight to the Ben & Jerry's display. I grabbed our poison—Red Velvet Cake for me and Phish Food for Jesse—and paid as quickly as I could. The rumble of thunder gave me a hostile greeting from outside. I hated
