‘So?’ The front door swung open and Ned’s smirking face popped into sight. ‘Are you going or not?’
Charlie
The heat, permeating through the ceramic of the cup was almost painful as it turned my palms red. Little tendrils of steam rose from the surface of the milky tea and brought with it that unmistakable herbal smell.
How different my life was now from when I’d taken refuge here on the day that I’d been heading for the clock tower. I’d been so sure of my plans that, if someone had told me then that I’d be sitting here, months later, waiting on a girl, I’d have laughed in their face and deemed them mentally deranged, but here I was. I lifted the tea to my lips and took a sip.
The sound of the café door opening made me turn around hopefully. My stomach sank when I saw that it was just an employee going outside to fetch some chairs in. I sighed and turned back to my cup. I’d hated being away from Nell and truth be told, I’d even missed Magnus a little. But that’s what the therapist that Kenna had found for me had said to do. ‘Only by gaining a little distance can we also gain perspective,’ she’d said and, in the end, even though it had been almost impossible, I’d distanced myself.
Nell had been right, back when she’d said that the timing had been wrong. Neither of us had been in the right place to fall in love, but that was exactly what we’d done, even though the Abi-shaped wedge between us did its best to keep us apart.
I think, truth be told, Abi was not someone I’d ever be able to get over completely. I had loved her more than anything in this world. All I’d wanted to do was hold her and spend every waking moment in her presence, then all of a sudden, I wasn’t able to do any of those things anymore. I don’t know if grief ever really goes away completely. It’s like a game of pass the bomb: you carry it, never knowing when it will go off, the threat of it terrifying. Until one day, when your time on this planet is up, you exit stage right and pass the grief on to someone else. I guess that death isn’t quite as final as people say it is. It remains in this world, until the last person who loved you, is no longer here.
But even though I knew that there would be days to come that would be worse than the others, anniversaries and birthdays where I’d go quiet and reserved, I knew that I wanted Nell by my side through all of them.
I hoped more than anything that she wanted the same, because we had already spent far too long apart.
I heard someone clear their throat behind me and I turned in my seat, almost falling from it with the enthusiasm with which I spun around.
My eyes found the face of the person behind me and my heart sank.
‘Excuse me, sir. Would you mind if I just wipe this table down, just so we’re ready for when this place turns into boozy housewife central?’ the young girl asked with a blushing smile.
‘Of course not, go ahead,’ I said, lifting up my cup and letting her wipe away the crumbs and coffee rings left by the patrons of the day.
She thanked me, smiled and walked away as I placed my tea back down.
There was no telling if Nell would even come. God knows that I brought a boatload of complications into her life, which had been just fine without me, and in the time that had passed since, maybe she’d realised that the quiet life was what she’d actually wanted all along.
‘Excuse me,’ a voice came again.
‘I didn’t spill anything, I swear,’ I said, turning with a smile on my lips.
My breath caught in my throat as I was met with the large brown eyes that I’d been craving for months.
Her hair was shorter than it had been all those months ago and she looked happier, more alive than I’d ever seen her before.
Her lips drew up into such a wide smile that my mouth had no choice but to mimic it.
She cleared her throat. ‘Excuse me,’ she said again, repeating the first words she’d ever said to me. ‘Do you mind if I sit here?’
‘Be my guest,’ I replied.
She sat down nervously, her hands cupping in her lap as she tentatively looked up at me through her lashes.
‘It’s so good to see you again, Nell.’ I almost sighed the words. The relief of being so close to her again was almost overpowering.
‘You too,’ she responded. She frowned a little, her brows creasing in that adorable way that I remembered so vividly. She looked as though she was trying to figure something out, mulling it over in her brain and weighing up the options.
‘What’s wrong?’ I asked, reaching out a hand and placing it on her arm. It felt strange to touch her again, as if I wasn’t sure if I was allowed to anymore.
‘Nothing. Nothing’s wrong,’ she replied, her eyes meeting mine and her brow unfurrowing. ‘I just want to ask you a question, is all.’
‘And what question is that?’ I asked, my heart thumping so loudly that I worried I wouldn’t be able to hear her question when the words finally left her mouth. ‘Ask me anything.’
Her lips curled into a smile, lighting up her eyes with a sense of excitement that I hadn’t seen her wear before. ‘Are you up for an adventure?’ she asked cryptically.
‘I’m up for anything as long as it’s with you.’
‘Good. Then, how does New Zealand sound?’
From the café, neither Nell or Charlie heard the tolling of the clock tower bell as it struck the hour. The
