But I wasn’t thinking about the car. I was thinking about how damn handsome he looked.
Even after all this time, I still couldn’t shake thinking about how chiseled he looked…how much his presence overwhelmed me…how he had such an intensity to him that I’d never felt anywhere else.
Granted, even considering there was no deal, not everything had gone according to plan. Having the OBGYN on call had probably proved to be a touch too optimistic and a waste of some money. I’d meant to ask him about some family history questions so I could get a sense of any potential health concerns. At least if he said yes, he’d have to answer them anyway, but I would have preferred some clarity over no clarity.
Still, I got as much as I could have out of the night. It was weird, it was awkward, it was funny, it was bizarre…but there was chemistry, and there was still a possibility.
Enough chemistry, in fact, that I sort of wondered if we might yet end up doing it the old-fashioned way.
But I dismissed such a thought as silly. And in some respects, it would be counterproductive. Burke would probably decline the contract if I fucked him, something about not violating the third rule I’d heard about from Kelly.
But then again, those boys had shown a willingness to break their own rules for the right woman. And maybe I was the right woman in the long run for Burke. But that was a question not worth examining for the moment—only the short term mattered.
I think.
The Next Day
I got to sleep in on this Saturday morning, which was a damn good thing since my mind was racing with possibilities from the night before.
I began my day by trying to clear my mind with an early morning jog. It was something of a Saturday morning tradition, so at least it wasn’t breaking from character too much. I couldn’t say it worked perfectly, but there was something nice about breaking a sweat and letting the mind clear itself a bit.
When I got back to my place, I made myself my customary morning smoothie, a healthy mix of kale, bananas, peanut butter, and a few other ingredients. I liked to say that while I couldn’t guarantee the day would go well, I could always guarantee that at least breakfast would. And given that I was bound to see, or at least hear from, Burke later, I had to make sure something went right today.
I hopped in the shower, taking my time and enjoying the warm water running down my body. When that came to a close, I wrapped a towel around me and headed to the kitchen to grab my phone. I unlocked—
BAM BAM BAM BAM.
A series of knocks came at the door, followed by a buzzing sound.
That was…odd. Not frightening or disturbing, but it wasn’t exactly like people dropped in unannounced. I figured it was probably a next-door neighbor of mine, Kate, a woman that loved to gossip, but maybe I’d forgotten about the UPS man or something. I retightened the towel around my body and headed for the door.
I peeked out and felt a rush of excitement when none other than Burke was standing there.
“Hi,” he said, showing no shame about eying me up and down.
“Oh my God, what…what are you…how did you…security doesn’t…”
Burke chuckled. I should have known. This was the kind of shit that he did for a living. A security guard working the front desk of a nice complex, no matter how well paid, was never going to match the efforts of someone in DOM.
“I hate to break it to you, but your security sucks,” he said, looking like he didn’t hate having to say it at all. “Since we’re going to talk, I figured I’d come over anyway. Mind if I come in?”
Jesus. Was this really going to happen right now?
Why did I think it was so possible that he’d just rip that towel off of me and do whatever he wanted with my naked body?
Because I want him to and because if he knew he could, he probably would.
“I’m a bit underdressed, but, uh, sure,” I said, knowing I was probably redder than a tomato in the face. “Come on in.”
His lips barely moved, but there was enough there for me to know that he was smirking. He wanted this. He wanted to regain that position of power that he was used to having. It was…intoxicatingly arousing.
I took a deep breath.
“Relax,” he said, “I’m just here to continue yesterday’s conversation.”
I nodded. He walked past me, and I half-hoped he’d grab me and take me right there. But that moment didn’t happen. When he was out of range, he sat on the couch, leaned back, and looked like he belonged in my home.
For a brief moment, I had a flashback to how Sean would do things. He, too, had shown up unannounced. But unlike Burke, he had a violent streak and wasn’t afraid to grab me to make his point. My therapist would point out Burke is reintroducing me to old patterns with new outcomes.
But still, it was not the way I expected my morning to go by any stretch of the imagination. At least arousal was a far better outcome than anxiety.
“Well, um, I think I should get dressed first,” I said, my voice cracking.
“Don’t on account of me,” Burke said.
I couldn’t tell if he was saying it as a sort of weird taunt, like he knew I was uncomfortable but curious, or if he was genuinely interested in me. I deferred to the safer option and made my way to my room. I shut the door,
