“I know. I don’t want that either,” I tell him, throwing my arms around his slender waist to hug him because I know he’s worried sick. I’m surprised at just how lean Tal is under my hands. He feels like a skeleton.
“Have you been eating?” I ask him when I let him go.
“Of course I’ve been eating,” he scoffs.
“Then have you been drinking too much or smoking too much? You’re really thin, Tal.”
“Better than being fat, right?” he jokes as he avoids my gaze and looks in the mirror over the sink to runs his fingers through his dark hair.
“I’m worried about you,” I admit.
“I’m fine,” he says before he turns away, opening the door and walking out.
I shut the door and use the bathroom, then wash my hands before I return to the living room, needing a few minutes alone.
After all these years apart, I never dreamed that Sage and I would get back together. Well, maybe the first year when Tal insisted that his brother would regret his decision and beg me to come back. But eventually he stopped saying that and I realized that, to Sage, fighting would always be the most important thing in his life. I think I even knew it when we were together but was content even though I never came first.
But then I focused on my classes and used Tal and his orgasms as a distraction from missing Sage. Eventually, I was able to think about him without it physically hurting. The past four years I’ve been around Sage more and more when I stayed the night with Tal. Never more than a few minutes before he was off to training or off to sleep to get ready for an early day of training, but it got bearable.
What if I get so caught up in loving Sage again that I fall back into that dark place where I’m so sad and lonely I can’t breathe? I don’t want to do that to myself, but at the same time, walking away now while Sage is recovering doesn’t seem like a possibility.
I love him.
I always have and I always will.
And not in the same way that I love Tal.
Sage was my world and I hated losing him.
But I’m stronger now. I’ve grown up a lot over the past eight years. I graduated from college with my business degree and now have my own, successful business. Working as a marketing manager for several companies fills up most of my days. It keeps me gainfully employed, while keeping my mind off the fact that I’m still, in a way, single and lonely.
Just one night and one more day with Sage, then I’m done. I won’t lose myself or my heart in the next twenty-four hours. Then, it’ll be time to start putting space between us, preparing myself for the moment when Sage remembers everything, including that he no longer wants me.
Sage
Sitting on the sofa with Eden curled up to my side watching action flicks is the best time I’ve had in…fuck, I can’t even remember.
“We should do this more often,” I tell her.
“Uh-huh,” she mutters, giving a noncommittal answer.
“You don’t want to, or you don’t think we will?” I ask for clarification. Then I go with the most likely reason. “You think I’ll be too busy training again soon and that I won’t have time for lazy movie nights?”
“Yes,” she answers with a sigh.
“I’ll make time,” I promise her, placing my lips on the top of her head. “Too much training will make me burn out before I’m even old enough to drink.”
When Eden’s arm tenses under my hand, I realize my mistake. “I’m already over twenty-one,” I remark.
“You are,” she agrees.
“I’m twenty…” I squeeze my eyes together to try and remember.
“Six. You’re twenty-six,” Eden says, lifting her face to look at me. Placing her palm on my cheek, she says, “It’s okay if you don’t remember. You will soon.”
“Yeah,” I reply, knowing I should be more concerned about the missing years of my life but not really bothered by it at the moment. Instead, I just want to spend every second with Eden, preferably inside of her. It’s impossible to be this close to her and not want to strip her naked and mount her.
Grabbing the back of her neck, I pull her mouth to mine, kissing her softly at first. When she parts her lips on a moan, I take the opening to stroke her tongue with mine. That’s all it takes to get me hard as a fucking rock.
With no effort at all, I pull her up so that she’s straddling my lap, my cock pressing right between her legs, so she knows how much I need her.
At first Eden’s entire body is tense, like she’s holding back, maybe because she doesn’t think I’m well enough for even the slightest physical exertion. But gradually, she lowers herself down on me a little more and kisses me back just as desperately as I’m kissing her.
I’m about to stand up to carry her to my room when my asshole brother clears his throat, interrupting us.
“What?” I ask him. Eden tries to scramble off of me, but I hold her in place.
“You’re on your own,” Tal grumbles. “Don’t come crying to me when it blows up in your face!” he shouts before he hurries out the door, slamming it behind him so hard it shakes the house.
“I don’t know what the fuck his problem is,” I tell Eden when I rest my forehead against hers. “What am I missing?”
“Nothing you need to worry about right now,” she says with a forced smile before she climbs off of me, sitting beside me again instead. “But, um, maybe we should take things slow, at least until you see the doctor.”
“It could be a week
