Don’t get me wrong, I love many members of the media, and I work with them all the time. (And my own industry has problems too; many designers put girls on the runway who look like carcasses.) But I’m tired of being terrorized by the “news.” Over time, our perception and intention of ourselves and our lives can’t help but become aligned with this fear-based messaging. It can make us paralyzed instead of proactive.
At the end of last year, I was reminded of the way some members of the media like to fuck our brains out with fear when, on the day after Christmas, the entire East Coast was hit with a blizzard. I mean, blizzards happen every year on the East Coast, but for some reason this one made front-page news in all the major papers and merited around-the-clock coverage by TV networks. To watch the news, you’d have thought that it was dangerous to even leave your house if you lived anywhere north of Georgia! I happened to be down at my mom’s in Virginia, and when I walked outside and looked around, I made the decision that—despite several states’ governors having declared states of emergency, which was being eaten up by the media—I was from upstate New York, and I could handle this. I knew the Weather Channel was probably just thrilled about all the attention it was getting and blowing it way out of proportion, anyway.
I grabbed my daughter and got into my black SUV and we had a more than lovely drive, solo on the highway through several states. Sure, I went slow, but I made it to Baltimore in less than a day, driving mostly on black pavement. There, we checked into a four-star hotel and had a fabulous dinner. Meanwhile, Philly, one town over, was on near lockdown, as the Weather Channel continued to inform citizens of the dangers all around them. They bought water, firewood, and extra food. “The Eagles game will be cancelled! New York is totally shutting down!” You could practically see the local weather people wetting their pants with excitement. For them, this wasn’t about protecting the citizens—it was their big moment! Their brand was blowing up!
It all reminded me of living in L.A. in my twenties, when on several occasions I was chilling at my friend’s house on Mulholland, floating around in an inner tube in the pool with Joe Strummer from the Clash, when old acquaintances from New York would call me. “Are you okay?” they’d ask. “Have you seen the news? L.A. is on fire!” I’d say, “Really? Where?” And they would say, “Topanga!” which was eighteen miles away. Of course, the news stations would be carrying on as if the whole city was burning to the ground.
The truth is, it’s a reporter’s job to report; they have to report on news—or create it—to keep their jobs. National tragedies are not happening 24/7, but the news cycle is. As a publicist, I can tell you there’s no one more receptive than a newsperson on a slow day. It’s a gold rush: they need content! At the same time, you’d better hope Tom Cruise doesn’t rescue a civilian in distress and that no one jumps off the Empire State Building on a day you’re launching a press campaign or issuing a news statement, because you’ll be fucked. It’s the same reason you can’t launch a new fashion label on Election Day. Sometimes you just can’t compete.
Even the best news stories should just be a starting point, not the final word.
We can use them to pique our interest, but then we need to do our own research and create our own beliefs. There are too many capitalistic interests at work in the media—the media brands themselves plus the publicists and lobbyists whose job it is to influence them—to take any of it at face value. Everyone thinks news organizations exist just to inform us, but really they are distribution networks for branders, advertisers, and publicists, all of whom try to roll their ball down the lane and get a strike—that is, impact consumers. Think of the whole system like a big bowling alley, or better yet, an octopus whose tentacles are all intertwined.
As a publicist, it’s my job to work with the media to get the word out about my clients’ brands. Let me tell you how this works in the fashion world. If, for example, you’re a publicist who has just taken on a new client—a hot young designer you want to blow up—you may start by making sure he or she is sold in the “right” five stores, because you know the fashion magazines will like this, and it will help you get a strike. Then, you’ll want to “gift”—send the clothes completely free to—twenty or so really cool celebrities, editors, and stylists. Once those packages have been signed for, technically you can say that Miss Major Movie Star rocks your product.
Another useful tactic is to simply call the celebrity’s manager or agent and throw down a money offer for the celebrity to wear the brand, whether exclusively through a three-, six-, nine-, or twelve-month contract or for a specific event like the Grammys, the Golden Globes, the MTV Music Video Awards, or the Oscars. This way you don’t have to worry about celebrities dropping your brand at the last minute, because their publicist or friend from high school thought your competitor was cooler. It’s a legal deal, babes. And this kind of thing has now has become its own industry: smart
